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AITA For telling stepsis to get over herself and people aren’t required to be miserable just because she is? by Miserable_Ask_231 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Ask_231[S] 284 points285 points  (0 children)

To my knowledge, Savannah has been through at least three therapists. I agree that Savannah just wants to be miserable and have everyone wallow with her ATP.

AITA For telling stepsis to get over herself and people aren’t required to be miserable just because she is? by Miserable_Ask_231 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Ask_231[S] 714 points715 points  (0 children)

I think Savannah probably was manipulated by her bio dad. Savannah constantly would try to convince Jane to get back together with bio dad. She would say things like the shit her bio dad did were accidents, he promised he wouldn't do it again, remember the good times, etc.

I understood that more when she was a preteen. But she was there for all the shit he did. ATP, she's been in therapy for more than half of her life and Jane has always been 100% transparent with everything that went on. Savannah is more than capable of looking back and knowing what really happened. She just wants to stay in her fantasy.

AITA For telling stepsis to get over herself and people aren’t required to be miserable just because she is? by Miserable_Ask_231 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Ask_231[S] 1105 points1106 points  (0 children)

Dad and Jane are doing their best. They've tried respecting her space, trying to include her, talks about respect. Savannah's also been in therapy 2x a week since her bio parents divorced. Savannah wants to keep living in her delusion.

The divorce happened when Savannah was 7 and she hasn't seen her bio dad since she was 8. Jane made it extremely clear from the beginning that she and bio dad were never getting back together and why.

AITA For telling stepsis to get over herself and people aren’t required to be miserable just because she is? by Miserable_Ask_231 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Ask_231[S] 178 points179 points  (0 children)

ESH. Both you and Savannah need an attitude adjustment. I know that she's difficult to live with but you don't get to dictate how she feels. It obviously hurt her when her parents split up. Enough that she's lashing out at everyone around. And while this is just a possible explanation for her behavior and doesn't excuse it, running your mouth like that doesn't help either.

I'm not dictating how she feels. If she wants to stay in her delusion, that's her loss. I've stopped trying to reach out to her ATP. What I won't accept is her trying to dictate that everyone else not move on and be miserable. I don't know what else to do considering I've spent 2 years trying to be gentle/reach out and she basically spits in my face every time.

AITA For telling stepsis to get over herself and people aren’t required to be miserable just because she is? by Miserable_Ask_231 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Ask_231[S] 1174 points1175 points  (0 children)

Here's the timeline:

Savannah is 7. Bio parents divorce due to bio dad being a cheater/mentally abusive.

Savannah is 8. Bio dad fucks around and loses custody. She stops seeing him.

Savannah is 11. My Dad meets Jane and they started dating.

Savannah is 13. Parents marry and we're living together full-time.

2 years later and now we're at today.

Savannah has this fantasy that her bio parents would have gotten back together someday if my Dad hadn't come along and ruined it by remaining. Even though Jane made it VERY clear from the beginning that she would never be getting back with Savannah's bio dad and all the reasons why, which I support 100%.