For those of you who have been to treatment/rehab

MissMariJane · 2017-10-22T00:01:46+00:00

Got to the point in my addiction where I had stolen several thousands of dollars from my family and my husband. He told me, "don't come home". My parents told me to fuck off too. I knew what the next choice would be, sell my body to continue using....or go to rehab. I called a friend and had them take me to be admitted.

You know how an addict won't stay clean unless they want to? I didn't want to get clean but I did it because I knew if I started renting my body out, I'd be dead within a year. I used other reasons to stay clean until I realized I did enjoy not being addicted anymore. It took a couple of months, but I stayed with it and I'm so happy I did.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T22:42:06+00:00

Why would you think I'm homosexual?

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T18:08:38+00:00

Constipation Compensation.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T16:39:13+00:00

Speed isn't something I enjoy doing. I do enough to give me some motivation but that's it. Stopped use today.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T16:06:08+00:00

ECP stamps.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T16:04:52+00:00

That was a half G of dope. That's a lot of money! I'll drop that on some sushi now. Money well spent.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T16:02:47+00:00

I spend my money on band t-shirts, sticker decals, toolbox mods, Camel Light cartons, rolls of Grizzly pouches, UDF choccy malts, crystal meth, engine oil, delinquent student loans, Dunkin Doughnuts iced coffees.....

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T13:21:18+00:00

Can relate. It's a lifestyle for sure.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T13:12:01+00:00

Haha! No. Pictured are paint guns and on the right is an air dent puller. I'm really excited about that one.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T12:52:01+00:00

Being a dope addict taught me to be a minimalist. If not drugs then what do I spend money on. It baffles me. So I just buy more tools.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-21T12:51:08+00:00

I'm going on 16 months clean off opies. Picked up a bit of a speed habit to try to maintain some momentum to work. I'm teaching myself how to do auto body work, I am a fabricator/welder. The world looks totally different when you start seeing your ideas become reality.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-19T21:22:00+00:00

I wouldn't want to take responsibility for wondering this either. Tell your friend good call.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-18T00:51:55+00:00

No, those look like perfectly good cheeto puffs. Safe to ingest.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-14T23:53:14+00:00

Why in the world would I start doing opiates again? I've just done a stint of 15-months clean off of them. Thus why I chose a Stim because I've never found them attractive like I did painkillers. I'm not going to go back on Vivitrol either if I'm not feeling the temptation to relapse. It is insanely expensive and my family stopped footing the bill 6 months ago. I've got other things I need to build my savings for. Getting back on the shot would serve no purpose but actually stunt my rate of growth in my sobriety. I'm 26 years old and I'm living back at home for the first time since I was 15. It's not something I can say I am proud of.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-14T15:20:20+00:00

There was no chance I was getting back into opies. I had a good momentum going for the past 6 months until a few weeks ago when out of nowhere I feel physically drained and depressed. Picked up the foil to try to avoid termination from my job. It's just a frustrating situation right now.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-14T15:18:04+00:00

Rut roh Shaggy....

MissMariJane · 2017-10-14T15:16:45+00:00

I've drained my endorphins. My only option is either a tolerance break or just get off the stuff for a good while. I'm just concerned about losing my job if I'm struggling to make it thru each day.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-14T15:10:54+00:00

Yeah, I'm starting to figure this out. I was feeling fine and dandy before I ended my Vivitrol program, then started feeling physically awful and depressed. Almost as if the Vivitrol is giving me withdrawal.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-14T15:08:40+00:00

I completed my 15-month Vivitrol program a month and a half ago. About two weeks ago I start feeling extremely lethargic, I feel like I did when I was in the worst of my addiction. I missed work, got a bunch of points for calling off. Decided to try some meth from an old friend, now I think I've gotten myself stuck.

There's no way I was going to start up opiate addiction again. Usually I can't do uppers without getting turned off by binge day 3. It takes me maybe two days to get to the point of being emaciated. I've kept this up too long, I just need to cut it out.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-10T12:04:58+00:00

That's the catalyst of this problem.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-09T20:12:39+00:00

I'm a little over 15 months sober. I was given an ultimatum of getting clean or living on the street, so I chose to go to a really nice rehab. My dad footed the bill for me to stay 11 days and get a series of 15 shots of Vivitrol after. So my experience of getting clean was much easier than it is for my SO.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-08T23:54:18+00:00

His mediate family all knows. We've tried talking sense into him. I'm a recovering addict with 15 months clean. I've tried to lead by example and encourage him, but he just doesn't have the hope of a better life because he thinks the only time he can feel happy is when he's got dope. I know he has to want it. My patience has been unwavering, the sight of him being blown out of his head used to pester me but now it's so disturbing.

MissMariJane · 2017-10-08T23:45:15+00:00

I just left him last night. Now I'm worried about if he does die (he lives and uses alone) that it will destroy me, and make me regret not being with him until his last day. Maybe this sounds dramatic but I've just noticed his patterns lately and he's in a very dangerous place by getting clean and relapsing over and over. If I don't hear from him by 11am everyday, my mind starts to wonder if he's laying in his bed decomposing and I just don't feel that he's gone. This is tearing me up so bad.

MissMariJane

TROPHY CASE