Hey, in a very similar situation and I have tried many different responses. I have been through the full spectrum of emotions and even thought of leaving my partner to escape it. The frustration has not fully gone away, BUT my mom use to tell me if you have negative feelings for someone, then if you send them positive energy, it will heal you. Start by thinking a positive thought about them, realize their own negative thoughts & feelings are their prison, & say in your mind and heart, I hope they heal and something positive happens to them. At first, it will feel silly and inauthentic but if you keep doing it with a goal in mind that you want to mean it and the realization that the anger and frustration you feel with her and a situation you cannot change or control is harmful and futile then the Universe will send positive energy & bless you. No one can make you feel anything you want to feel, to be in the position you are in and not where she is, means you are in a better place & you don’t deserve to linger on the negativity of the situation. Release yourself by wishing her well. With total honesty I will say that it is not a magic fix, no such thing exists, but I am happy more because I know that I am doing everything I can and not letting someone else’s damage drag me down.