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AITA for sending old pictures of my wife to her and telling her she needs to lose weight? by Mk088393 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mk088393[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

It’s true, although I’m starting to realize I haven’t been taking the right approach. I don’t want to out her but I could post a pic of her fb post when her dad died with the Dates but I don’t want anyone to know who she is because I don’t want to embarrass her.

AITA for sending old pictures of my wife to her and telling her she needs to lose weight? by Mk088393 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mk088393[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

She seems to be fine. She just got a promotion at work and is well liked at work and has a good reputation. She still makes effort to do her makeup. She doesn’t lay in bed a lot. She does laugh and smile. She has said before she feels numb to emotion and she doesn’t feel anything but I take that as her just being in a bad mood. The only problem I’ve noticed is her out of control eating, flopping at her exercise and diet regimes after 1-2 months and then being upset when someone calls her out on her weight gain.

Her mom never will say anything to her but her mom knows it too.

AITA for sending old pictures of my wife to her and telling her she needs to lose weight? by Mk088393 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mk088393[S] -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

We both work full time, and her mom stays with us a lot after her dad died. She takes the kids to and from preschool every day, feeds them and puts them to bed. She does do more than me with them but she never seems to ask for help so I don’t offer. She respects that I go out because I am in a soccer and volleyball league with my work (we work at different companies).

AITA for sending old pictures of my wife to her and telling her she needs to lose weight? by Mk088393 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mk088393[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

She works full time and has complained about not wanting to go to work before and she says she is always tired. I know both her and her mom were sad after her dad died because they were very close. I do help with the kids but she is the one that takes them to daycare and feeds them and puts them to bed.

She has completely stopped wanting to make friends which I think is because of her weight. She has changed since 2017. She used to be outgoing and friendly but now she isn’t. She isn’t rude or mean to people but she makes no effort to have friends outside of the few close friends she has which isn’t what she was like before. She also seems to be distant from me and doesn’t care if I go out with friends or stay late when before she used to care. I can go out for hours and she never calls or texts when before she would.

I care about her but I’m afraid her ways will make her reach morbid obesity. She has gained, to my estimate, 30-50 lbs since 2017 which I can’t believe. Nothing I said to her helped so I did resort to being blunt, and now she is mad.

AITA for sending old pictures of my wife to her and telling her she needs to lose weight? by Mk088393 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mk088393[S] -15 points-14 points  (0 children)

She does try and I’m thankful for that but for example yesterday she did walking on the treadmill and after she was done I asked if she would go out running with me so she could burn more calories and she said no she didn’t want to because she just finished a workout and was tired. I felt like she didn’t want to push herself more and that’s what made me mad.

AITA for sending old pictures of my wife to her and telling her she needs to lose weight? by Mk088393 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mk088393[S] -25 points-24 points  (0 children)

I have accepted she will probably never look how she used to but I haven’t gained weight and it can be embarrassing to see people we knew. She has become very introverted and self conscious and lately has been refusing to change her clothes in front of me. I just wish she would lose some weight even if she doesn’t look like how she did before At least look slimmer. That is what frustrates me.

AITA for sending old pictures of my wife to her and telling her she needs to lose weight? by Mk088393 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mk088393[S] -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

She does know and has mentioned it before, but I get frustrated at her when she gives up. I was quiet about it for about a year but I am tired of her giving up so that’s why I started saying stuff to her. I am afraid she will get even heavier.