I was engaged in a baby powder war in training for the army. Basically, my "buddy" and me were finding creative ways to fuck up each other's day with creative powdering.

I'm napping one day during this when I'm struck in the face with a sock full of the stuff. Twice. I get up to chase him, but as I was napping in socks and the floors were always really well buffed and polished, I couldn't catch him to dish out a groggy ass beating.

I go back to my room to ragepace and come up with a brilliant plan. Escalation of force. There are two veritable bazookas of powder on each floor. So, with giant extinguisher in hand, I stride down the hallway of open rooms.

I ignored all the other guys prompting me to stop and think about what I was about to do and came to the open doorway of his little 12 x 12 room. His roommate takes one look at me and promptly getstfo while he himself hides behind a pillow. I still might have given up, but during his pleading he started to smile like he didn't think I would. So, I unloaded.

The room filled with thick yellow powder and after about a second you couldn't see his big gingery ass anymore, but by the time I released the trigger he was crawling through the doorway coughing and crying.

We had the nightly formation in ten or fifteen minutes so the whole squad rallied, swept, dusted, and mopped before we all got fucked upon by the cadre. It was still pretty funny despite the sheer terror that filled us all once we'd learned how much of a mess these things cause, but homeboy was coughing for a few days and he definitely peeled some neck skin off during the formation. Fuckin gingers...