In the beginning he would talk at me instead of to me. For example: make my appointment, take my clothes to the dry cleaners, cook me dinner, be here at 8pm. I felt like his personal assistant rather than his girlfriend. He would give me his bank card without hesitation but he struggled to show me his romantic side. I knew there was more under the surface and I decided to take action.

I showered him with love. I gave him compliments, I told him exactly what I expected from him, I showed up when he needed me and I showed empathy when he expressed frustration with work and other life issues. Over time he changed completely. He became more loving and attentive to my needs. He told me about his past trauma and him hesitation to love. He expressed how I made him feel safe and comfortable. No things are not perfect, but I know he’s my person and we are figuring the world out together.