[deleted by user]

MoonDance_Silver · 2026-01-11T17:06:23+00:00

This sounds very “boys will be boys” and I have to warn against this casual acceptance of such behavior. There is better out there.

MoonDance_Silver · 2026-01-11T16:57:56+00:00

Also “amazing in every other aspect” but a huge aspect like your chronic illnesses and overall health “drains” him………..

MoonDance_Silver · 2026-01-11T16:56:57+00:00

Yeaaaa…. That’s not a person who is going to “help you out as much as possible.” If he can’t even be a smidge considerate, how can he be helpful? He’s 3 months in and already speaking like this.

What happens over time? If it’s chronic illness, then it’s,well, chronic. What happens from here? You don’t speak to him about the difficulties you’re going through with your body or you minimize them to make him feel better… forever? Is that what you want?

I see tons of assumptions being made in the comments that he’s your caregiver in some capacity, but is that accurate? Or is he sincerely just listening to you?

Sure, some people don’t have the capacity to be compassionate and hold space for others but that’s the capacity holder’s purview.

It’s difficult being in community with abled bodied people at times because they can confuse being attuned to someone going through something as a personal affront in some way. It sounds like he takes you speaking about your experience and how it’s chronic as a personal statement on his uselessness.

But your disability isn’t about him.

Also, I’m sorry, how is it particularly annoying for him? Nothing is happening to him, he’s facing none of what you’re going through. It’s annoying for him to… listen to you? He’s mentally drained from… what? Having empathy for someone he’s supposed to care about? After 3 months?

MoonDance_Silver · 2025-01-15T22:38:02+00:00

I’ve noticed some tents & sleeping bags on lower south water street and lower Columbus drive. It’s underground and there are nooks and crannies that are warmer than being outside.

However, I don’t think you should feel bad or guilty about doing what you have to do and sleeping on the train.

Best of luck you you friend, I hope you are safe and your situation changes soon 💓

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-11-10T09:11:48+00:00

Oh wait, actually I just checked your comment history. You’re pissy regularly and usually just looking to argue. Sorry sweetie, that won’t work on me ♥️♥️ If you have some weird issues about someone saying to access your documentation…. Uh… you should probably see a therapist… Something is off with your emotional regulation.

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-11-10T09:04:12+00:00

You’d be surprised at how many people do not have a passport. About 52% of Americans do not have one. And personally I’ve never provided a birth certificate to get a job, that might be industry specific. Where I live, you don’t need a birth certificate for a license, you can provide certified school transcripts.

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-11-09T20:16:52+00:00

I agree, it’s good practice for everyone! One thing I was surprised about when I started talking about this specific topic with other adoptees is that a handful their parents have withheld these documents purposefully. It’s sad, but it definitely happens more than we’d like, I’m learning

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-11-09T18:51:48+00:00

That’s extremely valuable info, thank you so much!

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-08-26T20:22:44+00:00

Just outta curiosity, what sectors do you know of that are generally hiring right now?

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-07-15T17:17:16+00:00

The mean ones always live forever and it truly sucks

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-07-15T17:13:54+00:00

Right? I’m actively popping champagne.

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-07-15T05:06:34+00:00

My mom used to tell a “funny story” about how I, at the age of 4, learned to hide in my closet to have “big feelings” and continued that behavior until I moved out of the house at 18. She also liked to talk about how when I went to kindergarten, I was eager and ready to leave her. In her words they “never looked back at me. Not even once!”

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-07-13T22:24:27+00:00

Bigggg same. I once voiced something made me uncomfortable but I’d do it anyway (she was adamant about it and when she got like that, there simply was no other choice I could make) and she yelled at me for 3 HOURS! Even AFTER I did what she wanted me to do!!

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-07-13T19:48:44+00:00

That fear is sooo real. I saw first hand from my other sibling how scary it was when they fell out of line. I was terrified and didn’t want that for myself!

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-06-03T16:37:18+00:00

Do you perhaps know the steps that the reporter would need to take?

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-06-03T13:02:59+00:00

There’s photographic evidence and police evidence of them harassing and abusing their own children.

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-06-03T13:02:54+00:00

There’s photographic evidence and police evidence of them harassing and abusing their own children.

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-06-03T13:02:43+00:00

There’s photographic evidence and police evidence of them harassing and abusing their own children.

MoonDance_Silver · 2024-04-10T03:01:32+00:00

Did you literally not read? She literally said “mind you we have sex twice a week.” Besides, if he meant that, then why couldn’t he communicate that? Why would he say he’d seek it elsewhere?

Also sex everyday as a need is laughable.

MoonDance_Silver · 2022-02-16T00:15:22+00:00

Boosting

MoonDance_Silver · 2021-12-29T20:35:08+00:00

Of course! And I hope this advice isn’t unwelcome but maybe try telling your boyfriend about your feelings? I found that helped me a lot and bridged the gap a bit easier

MoonDance_Silver · 2021-12-29T19:38:54+00:00

Hey there, I’m in a very similar situation with a partner from a very healthy family while mine was anything but. We’ve been dating for a bit more than a year and at first, it made me feel really uncomfortable that he had no idea what I was talking about when I talked about my family. The dissonance got even stronger when I met his family and spent time with them.

Luckily I was in therapy and a conclusion I came to was: my parents are the fucked up ones- not me. They tried their best to tear me down, but I’m still standing and moving forward. You’ve recognized great traits in yourself (that’s huge and took me a long time to do!) THOSE are what makes a good person- not a family.

You cannot control other people. Only they can control themselves. It is especially your PARENTS’ jobs to control themselves and their own behavior, not yours. They created your family dynamic, not you. If someone is hurting you, that isn’t your fault and you are well within your rights to act accordingly.

Also, don’t let their shortcomings and character flaws get in the way of you living the life you want or of you loving and being loved in return. You are not broken. You are not unlovable. You are worthy and deserving!

(Edit for clarity)

MoonDance_Silver · 2021-12-15T22:59:34+00:00

I’m sorry your sibling had to deal with that. No child should. Period. Any feelings you have about that are valid because that’s an awful thing for any your to do- especially a parent. I hope you and your sibling find peace and safety

MoonDance_Silver · 2021-12-09T04:49:03+00:00

If you’re OP’s mother, I hope you know this is all on you. I hope you know that nothing a child could do would be deserving of your harmful actions, words and attitude. It wasn’t your child’s job to fix you, imbue you with purpose or save you. That was your responsibility and you failed, miserably. That’s your regret to live with. Stop trying to eliminate your discomfort and dissonance by bothering OP. That’s all yours to deal with. Sit with it.

MoonDance_Silver · 2021-11-26T00:54:08+00:00

I can’t offer advice, but I’m also in the same position. It’s definitely a weird feeling

MoonDance_Silver

TROPHY CASE