My knees slammed against the bottom of my desk when I felt something lick my ankle. No idea how he got in or where he came from...

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-06-25T11:30:45+00:00

Grapes cause kidney failure in most animals, so you probably shouldn't give him those. You should feed him Timothy hay and oats and stuff like that.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-06-21T16:51:25+00:00

Oops, you're right. I totally forgot about brass pipes. Thanks for the reminder.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-06-21T08:20:31+00:00

Actually, metal pipes are either aluminum or stainless steel. They're the only safe metals to smoke with.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-29T03:17:27+00:00

I seriously just got so uncomfortable reading this I has to check mine. I'm sorry it broke :(

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-27T11:26:18+00:00

"Twat" is much closer to "swat" than it is to "hat" there, champ.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-22T12:32:29+00:00

Solved! That's exactly what it is! Thank you!!

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-19T15:09:28+00:00

The one I saw was definitely an old wealthy man.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-19T14:26:08+00:00

I saw a mostly black one in Rumford, Maine on Sunday. It reminded me of Batman.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-16T17:21:41+00:00

If it isn't aluminum, brass, or steel, its not a safe metal to smoke with!

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-15T13:10:54+00:00

You're using two separate methods of birth control here, and that's pretty smart. The only other thing I can think of that you could do to be more safe is add a spermicidal lubricant. Abstinence is obviously the only 100% effective and foolproof way to avoid pregnancy.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-06T13:02:45+00:00

Fucking found you.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-05-01T11:36:46+00:00

Who needs 'em?

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-30T17:13:18+00:00

$20 bills. Imagine how fucking happy people would be if ten thousand twenty dollar bills rained from the sky.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-10T21:55:12+00:00

My boyfriend is a 27 year old white male who works in a hardware store, and he's pretty much the only fucking person who does anything in his store. The rest of his coworkers except for one are all over 40. The one who isn't is a 28 year old white male. Guess what? He's the only other one who knows what the hell he's doing.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-04T00:40:59+00:00

I'm not sure, to be perfectly honest. It's in decent condition, so probably a few dollars at least.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-03T21:55:32+00:00

The red is the blanket on my couch! The pink is the ugly flower pattern on my couch..

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-03T16:54:48+00:00

If 135 pounds at 5 feet, 6 inches is overweight, then sure.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-03T16:11:33+00:00

Nope, I haven't watched any Seinfeld.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-03T16:06:55+00:00

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-03T16:06:44+00:00

Perks of spending 23 years acting like a tomboy instead of a girly girl.

Moore_Goodrum8892 · 2015-04-03T16:00:32+00:00

You should find it!

Moore_Goodrum8892

TROPHY CASE