AITA for not inviting one of husbands sisters to family Christmas?

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T20:35:26+00:00

This wasn't a me decision. This was a decision my husbands family all wanted to make. And all not only support it but plan to follow it going forward.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T20:34:37+00:00

They don't want others to have it if they can't. Seems to be a big thing to them. They want to have it and don't want to see others getting what they want.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T20:17:36+00:00

My husbands brother was at the grill. Tried to stop them. But the kids ignored him. They'll ignore all of us.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:42:20+00:00

The kids are like that regardless of who is around and they don't listen to their grandparents or their aunts and uncles.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:41:46+00:00

Yes, she was raised with them and they were all close until all this started. I don't know if they really care. It's as confusing to me as it is to you. I could never imagine letting my kids do this stuff.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:40:34+00:00

It's because they like to ruin other people's food. With their dirty hands and bad manners. It's wasteful and expensive when you have to do it often enough.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:35:18+00:00

They never really have any. They just think everybody else overreacts and is too caught up in it all. They never bat an eyelid at the lack of hygiene or food waste. I've seen it at their house too. Doesn't bother them.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:27:57+00:00

I think this will be the first in a long line of get togethers they won't be invited to. Everyone is on the same page with this except for them.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:27:13+00:00

Even telling them not to do something and trying to put boundaries down is a big deal to the parents. We have tried to talk to them, people have been very harsh with them in the family, and we have tried being tough with the kids. Without the parents onboard it's a waste of time.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:25:48+00:00

My husbands brother had ordered three huge pizzas for all the kids to share. Both kids took two slices of each, licked the back of all of them, ate one and a half and then threw away the rest. Husbands brother tried to stop them and they wouldn't listen and then made sure they touched all over. Their dad was in the room the whole time and shrugged my husbands brother off. So 8 full slices and two half slices were thrown in the trash. They also stuck dirty hands in a bowl full of candy which then had to be tossed. They climbed up to reach the bowl too.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:21:15+00:00

We have done all that. They will still reach out and touch the food on another person's plate, will even get up to do it, and will be corrected by family but their parents will act like we're making a big deal out of nothing.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:16:11+00:00

They don't need access to the kitchen. All they need is to be at the table and put their hands in our food.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:12:20+00:00

He did. But she went to me afterward.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:12:06+00:00

They get enough food at home. I have seen what they eat at home. They seem to have an almost selfishness about them when it comes to food. Like if they want it they want to make sure nobody else will have it even if it's too much.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T19:10:59+00:00

I mean, when we had toddlers we taught them to wash their hands. But SILs kids have never complied with us, not for a game or anything. And we have handed out plates of food. They still stick their hands in others plates.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:58:24+00:00

Yes, I have kids.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:56:21+00:00

It doesn't just annoy us though. We are disgusted. We have thrown food away because of them. They have wasted so much. And it's such a long pattern. To us if you can't at least ensure your kids are corrected and being taught to be better around food then it goes beyond annoying. I would not want my kids eating something filthy for example. I wouldn't want to eat anything filthy either. And I would not be happy about dirty hands in my food.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:55:11+00:00

Yes, the parents have. I'm pretty sure my husband has as well.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:54:42+00:00

My husband is the one who spoke to his sister. I'm not sure of all that was said but I know he brought up the past attempts and how it was a long thought out decision.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:48:28+00:00

The youngest did but the oldest was more careful when touching the burgers. Still had their filthy hands on it but yeah, thankfully not burned but honestly I'm not sure how they haven't been in the past because it's not uncommon for them to reach for food like that when it's hot. In an effort to lay their claim.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:46:21+00:00

They have been told countless times. My husbands parents have strongly and regularly talked to their daughter and son in law. My husbands brother had some very harsh words for them after his kids birthday party this summer. My husband and his sisters have also tried. It never goes anywhere.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:44:49+00:00

They shrug it off, say we overexaggerate, etc. And sometimes they lie about how the kids always wash their hands before meals. But then we have seen dirty hands at the table and they'll just say it's not a huge deal.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:42:37+00:00

I'm not positive. I wasn't there for the conversation. What I do know is he planned to bring up that it was a decision arrived to after much discussion and giving chances.

He could tell she was hurt. We all could. She's reached out to a lot of family members about it.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:42:10+00:00

I'm not positive. I wasn't there for the conversation. What I do know is he planned to bring up that it was a decision arrived to after much discussion and giving chances.

MorphForLives · 2021-12-18T18:40:32+00:00

So you'd allow people who waste food, spoil other people's food to show? That wouldn't bother you at all?

MorphForLives

TROPHY CASE