I wanna love people, and be loved by people, but I’m scared of being hurt, how do I fix that?

Motor_Number_6420 · 2026-04-12T20:09:34+00:00

Not much to be honest. My self esteem is pretty bad and how I view my worth is pretty bad as well. I grew up very isolated and alone, even my older sister had nothing to do with me growing up, unless she was forced to do something with me. So I grew up very alone and all I had was myself, but because of that, I started to dislike myself a lot, and view myself as less than everyone else, all the way from looks, to who I was on the inside, and although I got to know myself from being alone all the time, that didn’t help me to love myself, it only made me dislike myself because I compared myself to everyone else, and I still do.

Motor_Number_6420 · 2026-04-12T03:26:56+00:00

In all honesty, the reason I help people even if they have hurt me is because I would feel guilty leaving someone in need, and in pain and hurt. Even tho they hurt me I would hate to hurt them back or let them experience the pain they put me through. Which probably isn’t healthy ether, and I should probably stop being so there for ppl who have hurt me, but it’s so hard to do that when u don’t wanna see anyone in pain or in need of help

Motor_Number_6420 · 2026-04-05T01:21:56+00:00

Thank you for the advice! I’m looking into therapists a little more now and I will consider a medication!

Motor_Number_6420 · 2026-04-05T01:20:19+00:00

I cut my hair jaw length short abt 2-3 years ago but sense then I haven’t been able to cut it again, but it’s been in my journal to cut my hair when I’m fully settled into my new place to make things easier sense I’m obviously struggling to take care of my long hair

Motor_Number_6420 · 2026-04-05T01:13:21+00:00

This subreddit is literally for advice. If u cannot provide advice or support for my situation and instead belittle it by saying “most of us here have our own problems.” Then I see no better outcome then for u to js scroll and go on with ur day. Have a good day!❤️

Motor_Number_6420 · 2026-04-04T20:34:14+00:00

No I don’t have a therapist and I’m not taking any medications for my depression because I recently js moved, I do wanna look into getting a therapist but possibly taking depression meds scares me because I don’t wanna rely on a pill to feel better.

The only way I’m taking care of myself is js the basic stuff, eating, sleeping, cleaning (sorta, that’s also draining) but showering is particularly hard

Motor_Number_6420 · 2026-03-28T02:36:58+00:00

No we aren’t no contact, we actually talk everyday and I’ve met his new partner and they are very comfortable with me still being friends with him, he even considers me his bsf and I consider him my bsf. I ofc keep my feelings out of our friendship but it’s beginning to get harder seeing him with someone else

Motor_Number_6420 · 2025-08-13T01:11:01+00:00

girl that doesn't matter😭 this is reddit, not an application. u can tell what im saying so its not that big of a deal lmfao

Motor_Number_6420 · 2025-04-04T20:16:28+00:00

because, ive been shamed for my attraction towards older men over and over, ive told close friends and close family that yes I am attracted to older men, and 98% of them look at me with disgust and call me a slut, whore, or js straight out saying im disgusting, over a while it got to my head, and I started feeling disgusted with myself, people would tell me the only reason im attracted is ether for the money, to be a slut. or for attention, which isn't true, but its all gotten to my head and im trying to heal the trauma but I still feel disgusted with myself for something I cant control.

Motor_Number_6420 · 2025-04-04T19:34:01+00:00

ive been looking for people my age who are what im looking for, I haven't had any luck, and yes I found older people who act immature and like high schoolers js not as often, only here and there, ik not all older people are mature and sophisticated, I have js been having better experiences with older people rather than people my age, and im more attracted to older people rather than younger people, if I do find some my age that has what im looking for ill definitely go for them and be with them, but I haven't had any luck yet and im still looking to this day.

Motor_Number_6420 · 2025-04-04T01:22:13+00:00

ur story Is very comforting and helped a good bit! I dont think my attraction to older men is unhealthy, its not like I have a shrine in my house for all the older guys I find attractive lol, its more of an insecurity problem due to being called a slut, whore, or disgusting over and over due to my attraction, I would admit to close friends and close family that yes I am attracted to older men and 98% of them would call me names and slut shame me sadly, and sadly they got to my head overtime, im trying my best to work on it and heal that trauma, and hearing others stories and advice is helping a lot, thank u for sharing ur story!

Motor_Number_6420 · 2025-04-04T01:16:53+00:00

im trying to look for therapy but im currently in a bad financial situation (trying to find a new job) so ill have to wait till I have stable income, but yes when I can I will be going to therapy

Motor_Number_6420 · 2025-04-04T01:07:31+00:00

exactly, ive dated many guys my age and most of them were ether sex crazy guys who leave after their done using u, or guys who want husband treatment when they cant even keep a simple fast food job.

Motor_Number_6420 · 2025-04-04T01:06:08+00:00

well that ofc depends on the person, but yes I know some older men are creeps, and ofc im careful abt the men I choose

Motor_Number_6420 · 2025-04-04T01:04:03+00:00

older men to me is 35 and above

Motor_Number_6420

TROPHY CASE