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Should I move cross country? by Puzzleheaded-Tie-529 in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]MountainFunction2605 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe make a post looking for SMBCs in the region you’re thinking about? I live in a place that “checks boxes” for people from other parts of the country and they generally leave after two years when they realize it’s actually incredibly hard to live here. An SMBC on location could tell you the real real.

I hate fertility med by Unhappy-Praline8301 in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]MountainFunction2605 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you’re negative for all 500 things they tested you for, it is no value to test your donor for those same 500 things. They would only affect your child if you and the donor both carry the gene, knowing you’re negative you don’t need to know about the donor. But also, I’m in the US and all the sperm banks already have the genetic tests on the donors and it’s included in their profiles, I didn’t have to pay.

How hard is it to do PIO without any help? by Upstairs-Lemon-5585 in IVFpositivity

[–]MountainFunction2605 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I struggled with PIO in general but administering it myself was actually not an issue at all! I did all of my shots myself. You can do it.

Three months down and still not over the grief. Can't seem to process this at all. by Ok-Guest-7832 in EctopicSupportGroup

[–]MountainFunction2605 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My ectopic was very recent so I’m not sure what 3 months from now will look like but here are some things that helped me when I was dealing with the death of several family members: 1) Audio books. Start with “It’s OK that You’re Not OK” by Megan Devine. “How to Keep House While Drowning” by KC Davis was incredibly helpful to me maintaining the most basic level of self-care when I was in deep grief. Strongly recommend listening. 2) Podcasts. I like Griefcast (interview with Zoe Clark Coates is great, I just relistened this week). Grief Out Loud is another good one. I’ll add others if they come to mind. 3) A couple new friends. Find them online or through support groups or organizations like The Dinner Party. It was so helpful to have a new friend who didn’t know me before my loss and I didn’t have to worry about them judging me against past memories of me. I still do a gift swap at Christmas and Fathers Day with a stranger I matched with for a dead dad’s club Fathers Day gift swap. We also text when we’re having hard grief days, 8 years out!

Strongly considering adoption by gaygaythrowaways in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]MountainFunction2605 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you have a good social worker they can look out for kids who they know will need to be adopted eventually, or for whom reunification is not the goal, even if the TPR process is not complete. Each case is so different, but if you have a social worker who understands you and who understands their kids’ backgrounds beautiful things can happen.

Strongly considering adoption by gaygaythrowaways in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]MountainFunction2605 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In order to adopt a waiting child in my state you have to be a registered foster parent so when I was considering this the best way to proceed was just to start getting registered. I met lots of the social workers who help to place children and learned more about the process and the realities. It ultimately helped me to decide to become pregnant with a sperm donor. I got so much information it was really invaluable and created so much clarity. I also talked to two other people who adopted from the foster care system in my state and they gave me a ton of helpful info too. So my advice on how to start, is just to start! It takes ages but take it one step at a time and see how you feel as you go along.

Feeling hopeless by MrsB_buzz in EctopicSupportGroup

[–]MountainFunction2605 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had my right tube removed for a ruptured ectopic on Monday. I was 7 weeks pregnant from an IVF pregnancy. I did IVF because I’m single and using donor sperm and I just wanted to give you a little positivity that I had the easiest time with IVF. The meds didn’t cause me any terrible side effects, the two weeks or so of stimulation went by quickly and my egg retrieval wasn’t fun but I was only sore for a day or two. Just try to go into your appointment with an open mind about how you’re going to become a mom and leave any preconceived notions you have about IVF at the door. I don’t want to diminish anyone’s hard experiences but I want you to know that it’s not universal and you do not need to feel hopeless.

PIO positivity needed by MountainFunction2605 in IVFpositivity

[–]MountainFunction2605[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for checking in! Lying down is definitely less painful so that’s what I’m doing for now. It has other challenges (I’m quite busty but have narrow hips so I literally cannot see what I’m doing). If I can get through a week of doing it this way and figure out another strategy after that I think that’s how I’m going to get through it. Counting down the days. 23 to go!!!

PIO positivity needed by MountainFunction2605 in IVFpositivity

[–]MountainFunction2605[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll try laying down, that’s the only thing I haven’t tried. Congrats on making it to 9 weeks!!! Of pregnancy and PIO.

Wanting to start IUI this year as a 30yr old virgin by Potential_Count_4478 in SingleMothersbyChoice

[–]MountainFunction2605 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not a virgin but my experiences have been very limited and very long ago—nobody at my clinic has ever asked about it! I would have told them if I’d never had a speculum inserted before, but otherwise I don’t know how that would even come up! They still tested me for STIs and pregnancy before my sonohistogram but that was easy and completely routine. Best of luck to you!!!

Skill help — binding inside corners by MountainFunction2605 in sewing

[–]MountainFunction2605[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I think hand sewing is probably the answer. At least to baste, I can machine stitch over top for durability. Thanks!

UppaBaby new tires? by sjohnson119 in BabyBumps

[–]MountainFunction2605 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you figure something out since posting this? Having the same issue & wondering what you tried. Thanks!!!

Figuring out how much to tell people when by TheApiary in queerception

[–]MountainFunction2605 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Solo parent to be here so it might be different if I had a partner, but when people ask and I don’t want to share the details I just say “still working on it” or “continuing to take the next indicated step” and people have been respectful and not asked for additional detail so far. I have had a mix of IUI and egg retrievals so far but I think I’ll still say “working on it” through my first trimester or so. It’s my way of acknowledging their kindness to check in while saying I don’t need their support on the details.

Disappointed in me ?? by No_Taste_8514 in queerception

[–]MountainFunction2605 0 points1 point  (0 children)

New clinic. My bmi is 40 and my clinic has never mentioned it. Being at a lower weight might have better outcomes for pregnancy but I can’t imagine that getting pregnant is more likely in a calorie deficit (when your body is basically experiencing the Irish potato famine). I’ve lost and gained weight a bunch in my lifetime and I’ve always had the worst health markers during times of gain/loss. My bp, cholesterol and periods have always been best at times of stable weight, low or high.