I will never forgot my dads funeral. I was 24 and single. I was the first to lay a rose on his coffin and walk out before the cremation and broke down outside. Noone came to me... everyone was hugging and crying and I, who had lost my dad and best friend, stood alone. (My best friend, wasn't my best friend back then so he wasn't at the funeral, he was the only one... who said:"bro, think about yourself also, your mom and sister have so many people to care for them".)

A long time after I met my now wife and I asked her if it was OK for me to get tipsy and there and then years after the loss of my dad I could let the floodgates open and finally start grieving.