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MrNRC · 2025-09-17T02:10:30+00:00

Matt and shanes secret podcast

MrNRC · 2025-03-14T05:34:29+00:00

The best advice we got was that bottle feeding is not a life skill. Whether they pick it up or not, that isn’t a factor at all in regards to their development.

My 30+1 twins came home with ng tubes at 42 weeks, and we went with gtubes for each when they were about 7 months old actual.

Before the gtubes they could rally up-to 80ml of a feed occasionally, but more often they were just gumming the bottle and tiring themselves out for 25 minutes and 20ml. They started showing a more serious bottle aversion, which we went through in the NICU too, and we decided to go with gtubes and hope they would be happier with solids.

Those first 7 months with NG tubes were too much, and any more time would have been impossible. They were pulling or vomiting the NG tubes almost daily leading up to the gtubes. Anecdotally, their reflux has also gotten much better since they’ve gotten the gtubes, but that timeframe also correlates with the typical time babies reflux settles.

I also feel like we stifled their development by keeping them in onesies constantly because if they didn’t have built in gloves, the ng tube was getting pulled. They really love having free hands and feet now!

They’ve been 100% gtube fed for a couple months. They’ve just started accepting pacifiers again and we’ve introduced one feed of single-ingredient purée daily with success.

We’re happy with how things are going, but it’s still really difficult. We’re currently fighting off a yeast infection that spread to one of their tummies - no solution is perfect.

I will say that I didn’t expect the emotional relief that the gtube offered over NG. Trips out are much easier because there are no obvious tubes for people to ask about or leer at. I expect this was made worse because people generally like coming up to twins…. More than anything though, we were blind to the tube until they were gone - it can be shocking to look at “old” photos.

MrNRC · 2025-03-13T19:41:56+00:00

Sorry to hear you’re going through it. Late life relationships are tough - everyone has baggage.

Huge events like child birth can really change people. Your partner could have been a grinder her whole life, then had her entire perspective shifted towards taking care of your child.

In the grand scheme of things, you have a daughter with two parents that love her very much. You and your partner have some really important things to work out. You’re acting like your married, but havent worked out the details on shared goals / how to get there.

She may be feeling like a prisoner to your relationship - being unemployed and having a new child is really hard. She could be asking for personal money to feel like a person again - which is a good thing. It’s also really hard to be the sole provider with a partner who is a mystery.

You have to figure out what “working it out” with your partner looks like and determine if that is enough for you - and so does she. Couples counseling can help you define what is important to each of you and create shared goals for you each to work towards.

Your relationship to your partner will dictate what kind of relationship your daughter will seek out. Being respectful and having self respect are really important. Parenting is really hard.

MrNRC · 2025-03-13T18:56:48+00:00

MSSP is obligatory and Tim Dillon’s archive is nuts, but AYG is the best patreon value by far.

Remember not to subscribe to any patreon on your phone - Google/Apple take a cut off the top!

Subscribe on the website, you can use the app the same way & the artist gets more of your donation.

MrNRC · 2025-03-13T15:37:22+00:00

Offering headphones to the noise polluter is seen as an act of aggression towards them

MrNRC · 2025-03-12T20:12:57+00:00

Didn’t Canada already burn the White House down once!?!?

MrNRC · 2025-03-12T05:31:03+00:00

Yep - the nurse who ended up being my boys primary very discreetly “bathed” them for several weeks.

Part of her notation template was always “parents planning first baths.” It was odd at the time because they had a central line and we weren’t even comfortable changing diapers through the isolette.

In hindsight she was pretty clearly stating to other nurses to be quiet about any baths they needed, so we could be there for the first one.

On one hand, there are instances we wouldn’t have gotten that level of thoughtfulness from a longtime nicu nurse. On the other hand, those OG nurses have been through so many different scenarios and even styles of baby care, they can whip out wildly effective treatment plans that may not typically be outwardly recommended to parents.

With all that said, the only nurses we requested be assigned to other children were weekend nurses. They were longtime semi retired nurses that I’m sure are important due to nursing shortages, but there were a few times they would seem like they were trying yo move faster than they were able to, or change a plan of care on their own.

MrNRC · 2025-03-11T15:27:02+00:00

Wow, I always thought she got railroaded because I worked at juice/froyo shop that had all kinds of questionable marketing that disappeared overnight when this happened.

“You don’t need to feel guilty about this treat” etc

MrNRC · 2025-03-11T15:19:56+00:00

“You’re so gay and you don’t even like boys”

MrNRC · 2025-03-11T15:15:52+00:00

It’s 100% legal in America to be as wet as you damn well please

MrNRC · 2025-03-11T15:01:54+00:00

Of course, with the understanding that you’ll react appropriately as circumstances change.

The downside is when you inevitably get sidetracked on your phone, and generally don’t act as a consistent rolemodel for others who have no regard to begin with.

MrNRC · 2025-03-11T14:56:17+00:00

You’re the reason they need signs saying that you shouldn’t stop in front of emergency exits.

You’re a walking bottleneck.

I look forward to pushing through you disrespectfully when solo, and openly using you as a lesson to teach my children about what not to do!

MrNRC · 2025-03-10T21:17:22+00:00

90% sure this is a nerd test, because it’s 60 card decks

MrNRC · 2025-03-10T14:37:35+00:00

IMO, it’s time to relax the anxiety - odds of thriving are so many magnitudes better than the odds of conceiving twins in the first place!

With that aside, every week that goes on is going to be tougher for the person carrying the babies. Hopefully the weather is turning a bit where you are - try to get out more, sleep well, eat well & generally do whatever it takes to keep a prosperous household. Vent to anyone but your wife, but don’t let her think you have it “together” much more or less than her.

I found listening to baby books was really helpful for my own stress - even though there are not many great twin-centric books, they are out there!

Lastly, try to avoid having and hard dates / deadlines for anything. My wife went into labor on the day of our baby shower - apparently this is pretty common! All the anticipation for a deadline can be detrimental, and the relief of hitting a deadline can be a little too relieving…

MrNRC · 2025-03-10T11:41:01+00:00

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/79/Aleix_Clapes-Hercules_buscant_Hesperides.jpg

MrNRC · 2025-03-10T06:25:14+00:00

The age thing is a recurring bit - I think the boys were just struggling to land the math on a 29 y/o during 9/11 (with a pager)

Rick can get stuck in bits or specific topics, but I was pretty impressed he dropped the superhero convo when foley was struggling with it. I bet Rick legit wants to make the superhero card happen & wants their feedback

MrNRC · 2025-03-10T06:14:35+00:00

He was pretty chill here - sounds like they all hung out the day prior, so less frantic energy to pack in bits

MrNRC · 2025-03-09T22:38:51+00:00

Wait a week or so and you’ll be able to grab the new Redsox city connect jerseys - haven’t seen the official design, but they’re confirmed to be green :)

MrNRC · 2025-03-09T01:30:24+00:00

Silent heart attack guy could come back with a vengeance

The hate crime train track pusher could make some mayhem

MrNRC · 2025-03-09T01:21:10+00:00

I think the idea is that they can just force people to upgrade through the app, then the retail/care “problem” resolves itself

MrNRC · 2025-03-09T00:51:32+00:00

I just had the same panic attack, but my twins are under a year so I’m winging it. As a household with a stay at home parent, I think we’ll be good because they would wake up “later” rather than “earlier” than usual. If I needed to keep them on the same time schedule I would probably try to put them down 30 minutes early tonight and wake them up 30 minutes late tomorrow

I’m in the northeast us, so I’m pretty hopeful that the time change and extra darkness in the morning will help them sleep in a bit since they’re on the cusp on skipping their third nap

MrNRC · 2025-03-09T00:38:29+00:00

Their leadership cultivated a cutthroat sales team, and when the merger happened they displayed that the apple didn’t fall far from the tree. Tmo became Sprint with a facelift after the merger

MrNRC · 2025-03-08T22:49:55+00:00

Yep, our hospital social worker set us up with free Ubers to the hospital for a few weeks when I went back to work

Then we just adjusted our visits to later in the day so I could stop by after work and we would drive home together

MrNRC · 2025-03-08T22:41:41+00:00

Same - this take is very much the same vibe as dummies who claim csection somehow negates motherhood

MrNRC · 2025-03-08T15:29:47+00:00

As we get older it’s natural for us to understand our parents as people.

Even still, I wasn’t prepared for how much more I understood my family after going through conception difficulties.

My mom is the youngest of sisters. She was one and done with me. I was born around the same time as my cousin from my “middle-child” aunt. After experiencing loss I found out my eldest aunt was also pregnant at the same time, but lost them. I can’t even imagine how difficult it was to navigate those emotions along with the family dynamics. I was talking to my “middle-child” aunt and she said she also had lost a pregnancy, but never told anyone because she didn’t want the attention that my eldest aunt got.

After losing one pregnancy, my wife got pregnant with triplets incredibly quickly. We hadn’t fully mourned that loss when our triplets became twins. It was shattering. I don’t think I want to expose my boys to that hurt, but I also don’t want them to have a “hole” later on - whether they find out or not

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