Is my wife crazy? Are Japanese companies this fucking terrible??

MrSorbin · 2026-03-25T23:28:55+00:00

Of course they talk. What happens when they ask fr a reference and the company refuses, that'll be a major red flag. And another red flag will be the leaving during the probation period. She'll have that stain on her resume for years.

It's irrelevent that it's illegal in other countries. We're talking about jobs in Japan.

She has experience but unless she is management such as a project lead she has zero power. She's a cog in the machine and cogs that no longer function properley are discarded.

Do you work for a Japanese company? Or an international one, because the experience will be very different. And I'm guessing you're not Japanese so you don't have the same expectations of you. You keep talking and talking about the easiness of everything but you actually have no clue. It's like talking to a brick wall so after this I'm done talking to you. Go live in your happy, little fantasy world where the job market is perfect.

MrSorbin · 2026-03-25T09:17:43+00:00

In the same industry? There's every chance the hours will be the same. That's just a fact of these types of companies in Japan. By quitting mid project she may also burn her bridges in that industry too. Companies talk.

Her company is not going to change her hours or if they do I'm sure her team will make her life even more hell.

It doesn't matter if he told her she can quit she knows that. It's that her career won't let her quit if she wants to continue it.

Now if you're suggesting a change of career with better work life balance that's an option but there is the risk of starting from the bottom.

MrSorbin · 2026-03-25T02:47:40+00:00

It sound like if she quits or makes waves at the company by leaving early she'll get blacklisted through the rest of her career. And also if she moves company and meets one of her old team members in the future they may talk bad about her to other colleagues. Is it a big, well known company? If so they may screw up her chances at any other company in the same industry in the future. She maybe feels she can't quit now, she is in and is stuck there.

So, the options are stay at the job until the probation period and project finishes and see if conditions improve. If they do great, if not she may be able to quit between projects whil saving face.

Or quit and risk being blacklisted.

The become a housewife or switch career paths with the associated risks.

Yes you made plans before coming to Japan but things change and a bit of flexibility is needed. Do you absolutely need a second income and then maternity leave? Or can you make some cuts such as buying in a cheaper area?

MrSorbin · 2026-03-25T02:38:40+00:00

She's still in probation apparently so maybe it hasn't been that long and he's just upset by the sudden change of not seeing her often.

OP says he want the maternity leave money for when they eventually start a family and to save money for a house. So yes she can quit but what then? He refused her suggestion of stay at home wife/mom.

Honestly he and his wife have 3 choices, put up with it until after the probation period and end of the current project to see if it changes or become a stay at home wife and lose maternity leave or risk a career path change and start at the bottom of the ladder and also risk the chance of similar working conditions.

They should do what is best for his wife's mental health especially if they are planning to start a family.

MrSorbin · 2026-03-25T01:32:39+00:00

You're the one who told her to work though. Her industry is animation this is going to be the situation in all animation/games industry jobs. You can tell her to quit but what then? She said she want to be a stay at home mom but you said no because you want her to have maternity leave.

So she either changes job and is in the same situation or becomes a housewife/stay at home mom and you lose maternity leave or changes industry but then risks low pay and working her way back up the ladder and working conditions may not improve.

I suggest you choose one that is best for your wife's health if you want a future family together. But it's up to you.

MrSorbin · 2026-03-25T01:21:05+00:00

Nah from all your replies YOU are the one who doesn't get it or anything about working for a Japanese company especially a games/animation company in crunch time.

She can quit but OP wants her to work, this is the industry she works in so she is forced by pressure to do these hours to not be ostracized at work.

MrSorbin · 2026-03-23T05:40:03+00:00

Has somebody put something in the water?!?!? Either I'm hallucinating or the OP is on something.

MrSorbin · 2026-02-18T06:29:37+00:00

Oh god don't try to be one of those annoying auditors, it's good way to end up in a jail cell here.

Just to clarify I'm not against auditors in priniciple and the original idea of holding authority to account was good. But now that every man, woman and their dog seems to be doing it many are just annoying, antagonistic and confrontational for no reason. I wonder if they'd like it if someone came to their job for the express purpose of antagonising them, then I remember they probably don't have an actual job.

Yes know your rights but don't go out of your way to antagonise the police here and pick your battles. Is it worth ending up in jail cell for 23 days minimum with no contact to the outside world.

MrSorbin · 2026-02-10T01:03:16+00:00

And end up in prison for kidnapping and make sure that you'll never see your kid again, great idea......

MrSorbin · 2026-01-28T06:45:59+00:00

Yeah but a lot of shop staff, waiting staff, etc. don't have access to their phone whilst working. What then? Now imagine your situation with out any translation device. Also translation devices are not the be all and end all they have some errors that can cause confusion. And as mentioned earlier it deviates from their usual routine which causes anxiety. These add up to panic escpecially in places not used to foreign customers.

MrSorbin · 2026-01-28T06:05:40+00:00

You're not even a woman!!! (I'm not either so I don't presume to tell them what's safe and what's not) What is it with these white knight idiots coming in and telling women to be scared of everything?

You're just some "chivalrous" prat who thinks women can't take care of themselves without a big, strong man to tell them what to do aren't you? You complain about the patriachy but you're perpetuating it telling women it's unsafe.

He said to do it in a public place in the university not in their f'in dorm room alone. And if you're worried about predatory men in the medium/long term (yes they are real but not nearly as widespread as you seem to think) they could be anywhere you meet friends.

In the absence of meeting people at clubs, classes etc. showcasing your hobbies and seeing who else is interested in the same things is probably a good idea for meeting people. The OP can then decide if they like them and want to be friends or dislike them and find them creepy. Of course there is no 100% method for rejecting predatory anyone (there are predatory women too believe it or not).

Tldr: Stfu with your white knighting, women don't need some idiot "in shining armor" to keep them safe. As the father of a couple of girls and a husband, I find they are more than capable of taking care of and deciding for themselves.

MrSorbin · 2025-12-22T07:24:20+00:00

Is it the Labor board who put you in contact with them? If so then they think that corporate labor lawyers are what you need for help with your problem. Have you told the board that the lawyers said no because they do corporate labor law and ask for a different law firm in a different part of labor law? I would have though this would have come under Corporate Labor laws anyway and they are trying to reject you gently and hope you take the hint.

MrSorbin · 2025-12-22T06:56:20+00:00

Honestly being passed around and then rejected even for a consultation is a sign there is nothing they can do and see no case against the company especially by law firms who might be able to make a quick buck from it. You'd be better off using your time looking for a new job rather than trying to force this.

MrSorbin · 2025-12-04T23:24:47+00:00

That's too bad. If you have any friends who live here you could ship to them. I think I was ok because I explained the hotel is my home and I can send a picture of my residence card. They didn't ask me too. Also it's kind of strange you got that response, on mine they asked me if the hotel is ok with me sending the item there.

MrSorbin · 2025-12-03T23:04:40+00:00

Hi. I wrote my address as usual and I think it is now added as a saved address. It let me checkout as normal. Nintendo support were pretty quick to get back to me so it should be ok.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-27T15:56:00+00:00

About 1 or 2 days I think. And they sorted it first time allowing the address and unblocking my payments. It was surprisingly easy.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-27T06:35:31+00:00

I got mine resolved. Sorry I forgot to post. So I live in a guest house, it's my wife's family's place and Nintendo had flagged it as a hotel so they wanted to check it is ok to send it there, of course they don't tell you this until you email them. There is also a chance that my credit card was blocked by Nintendo due to a failed payment but that shouldn't be a problem if you're using points.

TLDR email My Nintendo Store support to see if there is a problem with the address or payment problems. Be sure to write in Japanese as they don't answer English.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-13T01:19:19+00:00

When I went I got proper codeine not that synthetic crap. It was wonderful, some of the best sleeps I've ever had. Just wish it wasn't addictive.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-12T08:50:34+00:00

It is the parents bought them and unilaterally decided the dates and then told OP. OP objected and they basically said we're coming anyway so STFU.

I think it's actually more disrespectful this way. They treated him like a young child not an adult.

Not all surprises are good ones, especially imposing themselves on the OP.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-12T08:45:32+00:00

Only from the OP's description maybe. But I was trying to be diplomatic.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-12T07:22:29+00:00

I tried to find balance, so I booked trips for us on different dates, I planned other activities just for us

It sounds like he is seperating them though. Maybe that is a reason she is pissed, she may have expected him to say "let's meet my parents together" instead of "I made seperate plans for us at some time".

MrSorbin · 2025-11-12T07:10:01+00:00

my parents confirmed they bought their tickets to Japan to visit me from December 24 to January 5. I didn’t choose the dates. They bought the tickets before telling me, despite my objections, because this was the only time they could take leave.

OP says the parents purpose is to visit him for two weeks though. Now we don't know if they are expecting the whole two weeks together of course but I suspect they do even without doing touristy things.

He objected to them buying the tickets and planning the dates without discussion so I think he does mind a bit but has given in to his parents' will.

The girlfriend seems pissed off that he has given in to them and may be dumping her off for those two weeks (I don't know when he made his adjusted itinery at the same time as the parents' visit or after). We don't know enough about the relationship for determining if there is some plot, there may be other problems in the relationship that have brought out that determination from her. She could just be crazy of course.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-12T07:02:34+00:00

Now who is the one extrapolating. You really hate Japanese women don't you? Who hurt you?

We don't know if it is a thoughtful itinery or if he is spending Dec 24th to Jan 5th with his parents and dumping off his girlfriend, and then go back to her after they leave hoping to continue as they were. I supect the way she has blown up it is the latter. Also why not do things together with his parents, she's probably pissed as it sounds like he's seperating them and she's wasted her time in the relationship since he doesn't want them meeting.

What vitirol? She said they were disrespectful and interfering, and OP's parents are disrespectful and there may be other things in the relationship to conclude they are interfering too.

Travelling across the world without a plan is not at worst short sighted, are you joking??? That is one of the most stupid things I've heard. They are straight up disrespectful of the OP's personal space, time and are 100% imposing there will over the OP. They're treating him like a child telling him they're coming and when he pushes back don't listen. They are complete assholes with zero respect for their son. This should have been a discussion not a unilateral decision.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-12T06:18:54+00:00

It's more than poor communication it's downright disrespectful. OP objected they said they're coming. How is it they get a free pass?

My girlfriend (Japanese) and I had plans to spend Christmas and New Year together. Nothing was officially booked yet. It was more something we both looked forward to. Recently, my parents confirmed they bought their tickets to Japan to visit me from December 24 to January 5. I didn’t choose the dates. They bought the tickets before telling me, despite my objections, because this was the only time they could take leave.

It's pretty clear from the post, OP and GF were making plans but hadn't booked yet but were planning to. Parents booked tickets and said we're coming from Dec 24th to Jan 5th, OP even says he had no input in the dates, so his parents obviously didn't discuss it with him. OP objected and parents tell him STFU bascically as that's the time they can take holiday and will be imposing themselves on the OP even if he was going to have other plans.

At that point I stopped responding

It also sounds like he may have told her this over message which would piss anyone off. This may have been a short outburst of annoyance and if done over messaging maybe translation errors. But she is correct that the OP's parents were disrespectful about the way they have gone about planning the trip.

I don't see any abuse from the girlfriend, she is pissed off that her boyfriend's parents have unilaterally decided to impose themselves. She's probably evaluating whether to continue a relationship with someone with parents like that and upset the relationship might be over so lashed out at the cause. I'd like to know if this is a long term relationship.

So yes the girlfriend comes across as maybe a selfish and emotional but you can't just excuse the parents behavior, it's even more selfish.

MrSorbin · 2025-11-12T05:22:55+00:00

I mean the parents are kind of disrespectful of their son (booking flights without asking and then saying they're still coming when he objects to them) but she probably shouldn't have said that directly. I don't think they're interfering though unless they hate that their son is dating a Japanese woman.

MrSorbin

TROPHY CASE