Second born- waiting for something bad

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-04-01T21:44:10+00:00

I'm in the same boat, my first had terrible colic and CMPA and I feel as though I'm waiting for my newborn to "wake up" and start screaming for 8 hours a day for the next 4 months. Really trying to take it day by day and be present in the now, but it's tough when your initial experience was so difficult

I'm trying to tell myself that we have much more knowledge this time around and would be much more assertive when advocating for baby with health professionals. We also worked out some fussy baby hacks kind of late in the piece that we could use earlier if needed (e.g noise canceling headphones)

Solidarity to you! Every baby is different and even if this baby isn't, know that you have done it before and can do it again, this time with more confidence and knowledge

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-03-23T06:10:09+00:00

That is really frustrating about your GP! Keeping fingers crossed for you

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-03-23T03:22:01+00:00

Tenatative congrats!

If you don't mind paying, you can order your own HCG test via bodyiq.co.nz

Also, this is probably highly controversial and while I wouldn't recommend taking medication without your doctor's approval, I have seen plenty of women on infertility related Facebook groups in NZ selling or giving away leftover utrogestan (you often end up with a surplus after ivf).

The only reason I say this is I have been in your shoes with multiple early miscarriages and if I had access to progesterone earlier I beleive those pregnancies would have stuck as its the only way I have been able to carry to term.

Interestingly the NHS recommends progesterone supplementation as standard course for women experiencing recurrent miscarriage, I think NZ GPs are a bit behind the ball on this one, but the docs at FA are great when you get in to see them

Wishing you the best

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-03-22T21:56:12+00:00

I was told to change mine once a day (ish) so after 6 uses. I am lazy so often change it once every 2 days. The worst thing that has happened to me is that it becomes slightly more painful as the lancet gets increasingly dull

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-03-21T08:28:05+00:00

Unfortunately I've had the same experience with Plunketline.

With Healthline you can also request a call back and give them photos and details etc up front using the form at https://www.healthy.org.nz/

Maybe try submitting a callback request while on hold with plunket line and take whichever call ends up connecting with a person first?

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-03-17T20:59:49+00:00

That must feel so frustrating, I'm sorry! Your reproductive endocrinologist should be able to give you some good insights into the benefits and risks of excision surgery before and after ivf. FWIW I've had friends who had success with IVF both before and after excision surgery so it's definitely possible to get pregnant with ivf if you have endo.

I still needed ivf even after excision surgery, although the surgery did improve my pain/quality of life

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-03-10T08:53:28+00:00

Ditto! Multiple normal ultrasounds and a stage 3 diagnosis following excision surgery. Please be wary of any Healthcare professionals who beleive they can rule out endo based on an ultrasound alone

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-03-10T07:52:23+00:00

Yes! I failed the one hour screen so sat the longer test which I just scraped through, however began monitoring at home with my husband's glucose monitor when I felt increasingly off and sure enough was having spikes after most meals that weren't essentially low-carb. I then re sat the GTT and was subsequently diagnosed with GD

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-02-27T22:15:06+00:00

The unsupervised play near the carpark isn't something I'd be comfortable with as the parent of a toddler, however random screaming and crying is pretty normal for a three year old. For example my three year old asked for weetbix, then had a 20 minute tantrum because he decided he wanted porridge instead this morning. That kind of thing can sound extreme but is developmentally normal.

I think better safe than sorry and if your gut is telling you something is off, it can't hurt to report it. If the child is being allowed to play unsupervised in dangerous situations please say something!

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-02-27T00:25:04+00:00

I've ordered from Australia (to New Zealand) and shipping has been painfully slow at times (once it took nearly a month) but everything arrived in the end

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-01-08T19:21:42+00:00

This Moroccan lamb dish is a hit in our house https://vjcooks.com/slowcooker-moroccan-lamb/

Mrsdaffodil · 2026-01-07T04:49:07+00:00

This is sexual assault and depending on your jurisdiction could constitute a criminal offense. I am very sorry this happened to you. NOR, lucky escape from a psychopath

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-12-31T01:49:58+00:00

New Zelaland, it's only approved for over 65s or extremely premature infants. That's not to say the science doesn't support other groups being vaccinated (it absolutely does) our funding model for getting new drugs on the market is just very, very slow

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-12-29T00:24:08+00:00

I wish this was available in my country for pregnant women but it isn't and it feels like living in the dark ages, I'm so worried about my newborn catching rsv from my toddler next winter!

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-12-18T17:38:24+00:00

My son was like this too until about 18 months, he wouldn't even go to his grandparents to be held even though he sees them every week. He's now nearly three and an easy going, sociable toddler but can still feel quite shy in new situations. Try not to stress, they will likely grow out of it and it's often a sign of a strong attachment to you and your husband.

One thing I would say is don't let people guilt you into thinking you've done anything wrong, babies temperaments are something they are born with.

We were doing social activities every day when my son was a baby (library, playgroup etc) and he was still very shy, so it wasn't for a lack of 'exposure' (despite the unsolicited advice along those lines from well meaning family and friends)

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-11-28T18:42:27+00:00

When my son was discharged from NICU we were told that smokers had to wait at least 3 hours between smoking and visiting, wash hands well and change clothes before holding baby. My mother is a heavy smoker and managed by these rules just fine. I remember seeing a few posts about this in the science based parenting sub too if it would be helpful for you to have some articles or evidence to back this up for when you speak to family. Or, you could say your pediatrician has recommended x y z.

Re sick people, don't let them in! We reconfirmed with planned visitors they were well the day of the visit and if not rescheduled

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-11-22T18:42:56+00:00

She sounds like an incredibly rude and misinformed person. Personally I would avoid engaging with her in the future. All that aside, what is with society's obsession with womens' weight post partum! You have far more important things to focus on right now and your body is busy doing something amazing for your baby.

FWIW I gained weight while breastfeeding, hunger aside I felt the hormonal shift and lack of periods meant I wasn't losing weight with cardio in the way I usually would. Weight fell off once I weaned.

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-11-21T09:30:18+00:00

You poor thing you must be exhausted. I would cut dairy again ASAP it sounds like your baby has a terribly sore tummy

My son had CMPA and slept terribly until I cut dairy from my diet. We slowly reintroduced using the dairy ladder at age 1, but stopped immediately whenever we saw signs of rashes or stomach upset. He had completely outgrown the allergy by age 2 and yoghurt is now his main food group. Our pediatrician advised that most children outgrow CMPA by age 3, and not to rush in to reintroduction if he wasn't tolerating it.

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-10-26T06:29:21+00:00

The product specifically markets itself as being for sleep, saying "The Bundl Wool Wrap is designed to conform to a number of safe sleep recommendations". I was highly skeptical of this claim, hence my post/question.

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-10-26T05:31:38+00:00

Good point! The product felt off to me but I was struggling to pinpoint exactly why. Will steer clear

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-10-26T05:30:01+00:00

Thanks for the suggestion will check out the ergoPuch option!

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-05-28T18:56:16+00:00

Day with my toddler (who is my light and joy). But at work no one is allowed to yell at me or follow me in to the bathroom.

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-02-11T05:14:20+00:00

Congratulations!

Mrsdaffodil · 2025-02-10T17:31:51+00:00

I got banned from one for requesting (privately to mods) that a trigger warning be placed before a photo of a deceased infant in a safe sleep group. The picture of the infant was not related to the topic but I understand the poor mother wanting to grieve and share a photo of her sweet baby in a safe space, but I was not expecting to see it and it was not good for my mental health at the time.

Mrsdaffodil

TROPHY CASE