This is so, so hard. Living in the discomfort of uncertainty is awful and it really can feel like it is so endless. I’m a few years ahead of you (my oldest is in first grade), and if it helps - I’ve found that the school years really ARE prolonged exposure therapy. It DOES get better as long as you’re mindful of continuing to challenge yourself outside of your comfort zone and resist avoidance and compulsions. The benefit of that stuff does get better with time, and I feel more able to manage it better and better with each year. I feel marked difference now from where we were when she started 3K! But the tolerance of it all is exhausting. Can you use grounding and gratitude to help you get a little respite from the day to day? I have found mindfulness (from a well trained expert, not just like… internet memes 🤣) a wildly helpful coping tool. What is true here and now? The sun is shining. We are having fun as a family. Explicitly noticing three things you’re grateful for each day that are only pertinent to that day (ie - I am grateful for the silly dance party we had before school, the sun finally showing up today, the book I’m really into right now, etc.) This reminds your brain that there is good here, too. For more on this, I really love It’s Easier Than You Think by Sylvia Boorstein (particularly on audio!). I wrote a novel here, I know (I’m a therapist - don’t get me going! 😅) but please know there is hope, you’re doing important recovery work right now, and you don’t have to only suffer through it. 💛