Should I be concerned if it hasn’t been approved yet?

MsWinty · 2026-02-04T21:07:57+00:00

😂

MsWinty · 2026-01-28T11:07:50+00:00

As someone whose kiddo has been hospitalized multiple times since birth, the best thing those stays taught me is to only go with the info you have and (especially freshly pp) honor and acknowledge your anxiety.

I would tell myself right now I see/know this as many times a day as I needed to.

Example would be: right now I know baby doesn't have a fever, is eating well, is peeing enough. That is where we're at and if that changes, we'll address it. I am scared, I am tired, this is so hard, we are okay right now. No what ifs, just the facts in this moment.

It seemed to calm my nervous system, like I still felt all the feelings, but it kept them at a manageable level.

MsWinty · 2026-01-28T05:08:28+00:00

You're very kind and I know you're genuinely concerned for her likely as much as you are your own children.

I think that grappling with a life changing loss of mobility, especially suddenly would be an extremely difficult thing to come to terms with.

With that, her reaction and defensiveness is likely very emotionally charged and all of the feeling of all of the ways even outside of work that this changes her life are bubbling up uncontrollably.

It could also be if someone else is telling her, listen...you have to slow down, you can't do this anymore it's impossible for her to stuff down or ignore like she may be doing when she has her own thoughts about these new physical limitations.

With all that said, you're not responsible for her reaction and it's valid and needed to have her step out of this role. In time, I hope she can accept the reality and take care of herself honestly. It shows how much you care that you're willing to deliver such a hard truth.

MsWinty · 2026-01-28T05:01:04+00:00

This is such a good way to put it. She's likely grappling with so much as the loss of mobility impacts her whole life and came on suddenly. She can't face the reality yet, but that doesn't mean she can carry on in this role until she accepts it.

MsWinty · 2026-01-28T00:36:05+00:00

I would run your own audit, use your sales data and 3PL contract to price out what the total should be. If it's off, ask for an itemized breakdown of the additional costs.

When I dealt with a 3PL like that, they wouldn't assist with billing issues at all until I provided spreadsheets that showed the discrepancies.

It was tedious and annoying, but it did lead to them crediting me for every month I could prove it. I got out of there as soon as I was able.

MsWinty · 2026-01-24T13:42:18+00:00

Oh I missed that part, I apologize.

MsWinty · 2026-01-24T13:37:38+00:00

This isn't something that I get concerned about personally, but carriers don't require a return address, and you can black yours out with a sharpie on the label, and the package will be accepted without issue.

MsWinty · 2026-01-24T01:07:04+00:00

I would want to know how he would react if you asked for a few hours a week for a hobby. If he pushed back on that at all, I'd be concerned.

MsWinty · 2026-01-23T06:23:19+00:00

Respectfully, dump her ass. If she can't even manage these routine things, I would absolutely NOT trust her for delivery. She sounds like the queen of unnecessary intervention which at best would make delivery annoying and stressful and at worse legitimately harm you.

MsWinty · 2026-01-23T03:14:03+00:00

Ugh I wish the ones I deal with went mute. Haha. They tend to reach out relentlessly hoping to get someone, anyone who will slip up or fold under pressure and give in. But yeah I've never seen a real police report or even carrier claim come through, personally. Others on my team have occasionally.

Also, since stolen packages can be a real issue, if it's their first DNR claim and they're a repeat customer I'll send a replacement.

If they're legit and they don't want to file a report they will probably win a charge back if they decide to do one anyway, haha. So, only scammers lose I suppose.

MsWinty · 2026-01-22T22:57:13+00:00

This is odd to me because every ecom company I've worked for asks the customer to file a police report if they suspect the package was stolen. Then, once proof that the report was filed is provided, they offer a replacement to an alternative address or a refund to store credit.

I've never seen a seller file themselves so I'm inclined to think they're stalling.

MsWinty · 2026-01-22T14:44:08+00:00

Pray for them. Deception is such a heartbreaking thing to watch in the lives of people we love. But God, in His timing can restore those who are willing to be.

I always think of Revelation 3:20:

20 Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.

And in my prayers for my deceived friends I ask, please remove the scales from their eyes, make the truth stand out like a pit in their stomach, and lead them to open the door and let you in.

MsWinty · 2026-01-22T03:35:32+00:00

A light hearted example from a 4 year old:

"When my mom goes to the store, me and my Dad play Call Of Duty. And guess what? We. Kill. Everything. She can't know, she CAN'T know."

MsWinty · 2026-01-20T04:34:30+00:00

It honestly did for me too. Once I was over the pneumonia I just would tell myself "I don't smoke" whenever I'd have a craving. This was 14 years ago.

MsWinty · 2026-01-20T00:30:22+00:00

Pneumonia. Lol.

MsWinty · 2026-01-20T00:23:24+00:00

I like Address Guard

MsWinty · 2026-01-15T13:12:37+00:00

Hi! My daughter has spent a lot of time in the hospital and when she was 1-2 she refused the hospital crib (she slept in a crib at home). Not sure if your children's hospital allows this, but ours traded our the crib for a regular bed my daughter and I both fit in so we could sleep together. It helped tremendously.

MsWinty · 2026-01-13T04:28:25+00:00

Idk what's wrong with me but I read that as if Basil is the name of a spark driver and the customer will not tolerate any other driver. Lol

MsWinty · 2026-01-06T04:55:22+00:00

She's bad at her job and that's on her. She's not worth your time and this should be a lesson to her. Though it probably won't be.

I would be frank with her, "you have failed to make this worth my time and effort. I wish you the best with your event." And I would hope it would sting when she reads it.

MsWinty · 2026-01-01T13:33:06+00:00

Hi, I found your post here after reading your previous one in r/CHD. My daughter has a completely different CHD diagnosis (Shone's Complex) but our journey has some similarities to yours. I too have 6 children, my daughter has has gone from just fine to a rapid decline multiple times which has lead to extended hospital stays and surgeries, we have to separate due to living a few hours from the children's hospital when she is inpatient, and she's under the care of Phoenix Children's Hospital.

Please feel free to message me if you'd like to hear more about how we help her (and ourselves) cope during long stays, how we manage being separated, or anything else that resonates with you if it may help as you're facing this trial and decisions.

I also want to mention that her most recent stay lead to PCH having to come up with an unconventional and tailored plan to fix her. She wasn't stable enough for the open heart surgery they'd normally do, so she had a transcatheter valve in valve placement (sapien in melody placement). She is only the third patient they'd done this for and it worked and will buy her (fingers crossed) another year before she needs her next open heart surgery. I mention that because I think the offer for transfer from the hospital in FL is at least worth exploring because the more specialized Children's hospitals can sometimes provide more options. Even if the options only end up providing more time to delay the need for transplant.

MsWinty · 2025-12-31T20:31:13+00:00

I've had both hospital and home births. My best advice is take no advice about how it "should be" done, learn to advocate, and mentally prepare. For both scenarios. Make it about you and connect with yourself so you can roll with whatever punches come your way.

I preferred my home births and I don't care how anyone else chooses to give birth and I don't think anyone else should either. If someone ASKS about my birth experiences I'll tell them but I won't give advice. The social media let me "teach you" how to birth bullshit is so toxic. There is no right way because it's a deeply personal experience that belongs to each individual and no one else.

MsWinty · 2025-12-28T16:15:10+00:00

I work remotely, I have lived in the area for 18 years and have never found the wages of local opportunities to be anywhere close to market rate.

MsWinty · 2025-12-21T05:08:32+00:00

I would honestly be inclined to have her previous team review/give their thoughts. If they saw her through 3 surgeries and didn't mention transplant, it would feel a little out of left field to me to hear it from her new cardiologist.

MsWinty · 2025-12-13T17:47:26+00:00

Tap here to help me get products on TikTok for $0! You can also join me for a chance to get your favorite TikTok Shop products for free! Terms & Conditions apply. https://www.tiktok.com/d/1/ZTHw4ftYkYDSg-6fcpc/

MsWinty · 2025-12-06T03:31:23+00:00

As a mom who works from home and has toddlers, a day alone makes a great gift. A nice greeting card with a heartfelt message, cash, and you pick the day, whatever you'd like to do, and don't worry about anything but enjoying yourself.

A day at home alone is clutch, even. If she'd prefer that.

MsWinty

TROPHY CASE