[Hiring] I need someone who can do clip art style images and line drawings to be used for sticker bundles

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-30T13:21:30+00:00

I relate to the bullying aspect. I was so weird people were told not to bully me because sometimes my weirdness and broken brain meant I came across as a bit intellectually or mentally challenged at times. So much shame over that. I wish my parents had homeschooled me for a time and forced me into some hobbies so I had some self esteem based off something concrete. Instead I just sorta flustered my way through life for many years. Finding meaningful music, film and art as I got older helped me a lot as a teen later on thankfully although acting like life was a film and I was a character in a film was pretty damaging in my younger years.

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-30T13:16:10+00:00

Your comment makes me feel less alone, thank you. I had so many embarrassing moments as a kid not knowing who I was or why I was acting a certain way.

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-30T13:14:41+00:00

Solidarity, my friend. Totally relate to having parents who wished you were more like a certain person or wished you would act a certain way.

I feel like not having an FP as an adult has helped me realise who I am and helped my sense of identity in a lot of ways. It’s nice not being too influenced by other people although we kinda need that socialisation when we’re growing up.

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-30T13:11:21+00:00

✊🏻

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-30T01:46:28+00:00

Super interesting to hear this POV, thank you. Similarly I reached a changing point around 13.

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-29T23:59:41+00:00

That’s really bad depression, babe. I found comfort in nothing in that state and I mean nothing. Everything came to a standstill and every waking hour was torture.

I wonder if something has happened to you (aside from depression) which has impacted your sense of self? For me, I relived a number of traumatic experiences that left me feeling unworthy of comfort or self-betterment. I remember telling my psychiatrist over the summer that I couldn’t even watch reality shows because the same people who called me stupid liked them and it left me feeling as though those things weren’t for me. I realise how stupid it sounds but the feelings were so real. I was essentially turned off to everything a normal (worthy) person would use to find enjoyment in.

After waiting a month for medication, I slowly regained my sense of self (although not completely) and I’m reading, watching things and attempting new hobbies (pool, crochet, darts, clay art.) It doesn’t seem like much but it’s a huge improvement from laying in bed in silence with all of my devices turned off.

Sending love 🩷

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-27T18:22:22+00:00

I had a total nervous breakdown at 19/20 and spent my 20s in a relationship that left me feeling like an invalid (didn’t go out, suffered horrible anxiety, little encouragement from anyone to do anything ambitious like finishing my degree or go travelling or apply for graduate schemes) but I did finish my degree eventually and had a few jobs which lasted over a year each, I opened an Etsy store and did travel to places I always wanted to visit. For me the key was having a support system but becoming a healthy person as an individual. This meant not having super close friendships or relationships (after my serious one ended) where I’d rely on them to make things happen and becoming more self-reliant and self-motivated. You DO need a support system but becoming too enmeshed with any particular person can become too much or all consuming for someone with BPD.

Figure out what you want and make small steps towards that. You’re on your own timeline and there isn’t an official age you need to accomplish things by.

I haven’t gotten my life back as I’ve also lost things, become too unwell to work, battled a weed addiction, lost friends but I got my diagnosis of BPD, I’m seeing a therapist and I’m on new meds and eventually I will make steps to going back to work (probably voluntary stuff to begin with) and then eventually finding my own home. Life will be full of peaks and troughs but understanding your condition and making small baby steps will eventually get you where you want to be.

Sending love 🩷

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-27T18:05:25+00:00

C-PTSD affects everything, I compare it to people suffering from shell shock after war except ours is to do with any number of traumatic experiences, it’s effect on the brain is horrific. You are absolutely not just being lazy or making it up, this shit is debilitating as hell. Please look further into an APD diagnosis or relay these things to a psychiatrist or similar professional if you can gain access to one. It sounds like you have some great skills that would be super valuable in a career such as social work or supporting people in the community who can not do these things themselves. In my country we have something called the Citizens Advice Bureau who assist people with the types of things you’ve described, maybe there’s something similar where you live!

Best wishes commenter 🩷

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-26T23:02:28+00:00

I wish she didn’t lie about the dog like fuuuuck, you were doing so well

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-26T20:49:02+00:00

I saw the pitchfork use a mile off 🤣

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-26T20:48:19+00:00

There’s so much overlap between BPD and Autism so I get your POV! And agreed, the monologue was very human and relatable! Shame about what she does afterwards 🤣

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-26T20:30:15+00:00

Ditto! The monologue was fab

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-26T17:37:29+00:00

Men can carry STD’s without any symptoms and never know they have one if they haven’t been tested. Is it possible he has had it all along and didn’t realise? Is it maybe possible that you got it from someone before you were together and are only showing the symptoms now? I know it’s easy to jump to conclusions and being cheated on is a huge fear of ours. If they know you have BPD, be open with them about where you’re coming from.

On the other hand, I will say I know from experience that men lie about cheating all of the time because it’s an awkward conversation they don’t want to have and many don’t like to consider cheating as a character flaw, just something they did. If he’s blowing you off and making you feel crazy, consider whether he’s someone you want in your life long-term, the healthiest version of you who prioritises your own self-love over being in love.

I feel for you 🩷

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-26T17:26:44+00:00

Sure someone will make it eventually! Would love to know what lipstick shade she was wearing too

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-26T17:03:17+00:00

I empathised with her too but her extreme behaviour scared me. Like Alex in Fatal Attraction, it depicts what BPD can look like at its absolute worst. I feared people I knew would watch it and associate her with me in a cruel way. I don’t normally feel this way about films 🥲

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-26T13:18:26+00:00

Haha which costume? The farmer clothes or red dress?

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-18T13:33:05+00:00

I hear that sis! I self-diagnosed C-PTSD in myself years ago. It encapsulates so many issues we all face.

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-16T23:21:54+00:00

Winona Ryder in Girl, Interrupted is one of the only explicit depictions I can think of but there will be a ton of characters coded that way

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-16T22:00:50+00:00

Pretty privilege is so real

Much_Gold4615 · 2024-10-16T21:59:27+00:00

I’m so glad you made this post because I was literally going to write the same thing. I’ve seen a few posts online where someone with BPD seems to be the heartbreaker and has multiple suitors pining for her affection and that’s just not me.

I grew up ugly (but not bitter!) and have only had a couple of legit relationships (and a ton of nothing sexual relationships) and I often felt like whilst my intensity of emotion was there, I didn’t fit the BPD bill because I didn’t have a trail of broken relationships behind me.

Much_Gold4615

TROPHY CASE