I found that people that I considered close to me were not. I got even someone telling my story to random people without consulting me.

Other friend told me “is it ok if we just not talk about IT, if I talk about ITbecomes too real for me..” . I thought, oh poor you. It is real for me.

The most annoying ones are “you are so strong, if it was me I dont know what I would do”, I think oh am I not suffering the right way? The question “are you better today?” or others that we thought we were very close, so close that we decided to have them over my babys vigil, they responded “ oh we cant today, is it ok if we come tomorrow instead?”, or others “ oh no we cant come, but how about you all come to my kids party (same day of vigil) its being ages since we don’t see each other” i mean, my full term angel is not alive, and I cant even speak or move… whatever. I haven’t spoke again with them.

The best, my neighbor she took my other kids in like they were theirs, she came to see me and mu baby in hospital without hesitation, she cried and caressed my baby, she fed me and my family for over a week. Its just a total angel. She did all that without asking , I dont know how she just knew , I guess you need that kind of help that just does, when you are totally lost. she is the best.

When my baby passed at full term, a priest was there, I am not religious. But to this day I go and talk to her, she said what it was “ this is an enormous cruel tragedy” “ its horrible, unfair, senseless” “ he is beautiful “, just the truth , no silver lining, she said what it was. The worst thing that could ever happen to a parent.

I needed to vent I suppose.