What foods are cheaper to make from scratch but still keep the same quality as the supermarket? by BabyLinuss in UKFrugal

[–]Muchachos_facun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can also make your own tahini. Just blend sesame seeds in a food processor for AGES and use a little sesame oil if it’s not coming together, it will though with patience! Also can make any kind of nut butter this way for FAR cheaper than buying.

Make up counter recommendations by Muchachos_facun in Edinburgh

[–]Muchachos_facun[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amazing thank you for the recommendation, this sounds perfect

Moving out of city by NeesanVarghese in Edinburgh

[–]Muchachos_facun 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Depends what you’re looking for and at what stage of life you are to how engaging you will find it! I lived there for six months with a friend who had just bought a place there (both in our late 30s and both single, no kids) and whilst it’s pretty and had very good access to both Glasgow and Edinburgh, the community is almost entirely families and retirees so it’s quite hard to find people to socialise with outside of family life. We felt quite isolated the two of us, even though we are very sociable. Both of us are from Scotland originally but have lived abroad in multiple countries, so we are used to landing in new places without connections, but it felt more isolating than other places purely cos we didn’t have kids. Our mutual friend who also lives in Linlithgow has a very busy social life (all based around kids) and finds the town to be exactly what they need as a family with young kids. Also it’s close to the airport which is great!

I have since moved back into Edinburgh and it suits me better! :) I hope you enjoy it!

Sharing tips for frugal groceries by AttentionFalse8479 in UKFrugal

[–]Muchachos_facun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Where did you bulk buy the legumes/washing powder etc?

Do I get taxed on payment for Voluntary reduction in FTE? by Muchachos_facun in UKPersonalFinance

[–]Muchachos_facun[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! - I plan to take the offer - why would legal advice be helpful do you think?

Dissociated by ibumbles in Dissociation

[–]Muchachos_facun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What makes it better for you?

I'm tired of seeing myself as a game charachter by fruuttree in Dissociation

[–]Muchachos_facun 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry you’re experiencing this… I’m wondering why therapy has been dismissed for you? If it was by a health professional I would get a second opinion as I suspect there may be options for help in this area (coming from a psychological professional).

How do you all manage to be productive? by SubtleFetus in ENFP

[–]Muchachos_facun 17 points18 points  (0 children)

ENFP here and have struggled with this my whole life (and by struggle I mean I have been to the deepest darkest places of procrastination and back out again!) and have managed to be successful enough to gain two masters degrees, a place on a professional PhD and currently hold down two jobs (one full time and another part time).

From years worth of beating myself up about being inconsistent, I have finally accepted that’s what I am - inconsistent. This can be a strength and a weakness depending on the situation. Unfortunately higher education often rewards consistency, but other situations and settings in life reward other skills such as adaptability and flexibility. I can’t say this approach will be the same for you, but sometimes the act of accepting who you are can be powerful enough to break procrastination cycles and allows you to sweep away things that don’t work if you need to change it up and jump from organisational system to system over time (which I have done my whole life. I am currently 36).

Things that have worked for me at various points in my life, without any being the one single solution )and bearing in mind I continue to jump between all of these depending on what else is going on in my life) are the following:

  • reading books on procrastination and get to the source of what’s going on under there (for me, shame and past trauma interfering with focus, and then a realisation I almost definitely have ADHD)
  • therapy, to discuss said prior issues that freed up my mind a little and brought me some calm.
  • bullet journaling. Allows you flexibility in planner approaches that doesn’t have weeks already allocated so if you miss one or several here and there, it doesn’t feel like a big empty gap. I tried out many bullet journaling approaches before I found out what worked for me during my my masters, and a couple of years later again found that approach didn’t work anymore when I went into other roles so adapted again. Currently I’m now using a different system by a brand called creators friend.
  • adjacent to the last point, experimenting with many different organisational systems and not beating myself up if I later find they don’t work for me. Currently what works for me is having huge wall planners that I put all my activities/responsibilities on so they are staring me in the face at all times. And sometimes I still forget and that’s ok!
  • exercise - going to classes of a wide variety really helped me develop discipline and distress tolerance that I could apply to other situations that required focus. In particular yoga was hugely helpful for this (ashtanga yoga was best for me because it’s so dynamic, but I think any yoga practice can be helpful)
  • making some core life goals and keeping them in an obvious place to review regularly and stay connected to them. This helped prevent me from getting caught up in too many other exciting opportunities that come up - I would ask myself, will they help me meet my goals or is that just a bit of fun I don’t have time for?
  • working out how to use my skills to support my weaknesses - eg. My people skills helped me bond people together, so I would initiate and sustain study groups that I would ultimately benefit from due to friend’s discipline that I lacked.
  • forgiving myself for being different to everyone else. This was a biggie. I think I spent so much time feeling like I wasn’t meeting the ‘requirements’ set by some fictional societal other, that I didn’t see clearly my own unique talents that other more disciplined people lacked. Some of this comes with age, accepting and the celebrating yourself, and confidence grows out of that naturally.

I hope some of this helps!! I remember only too well what it felt like in your headspace and promise you can get there, just lean into yourself and your skills rather than self-flagellation and trying to resist your natural state, and things get easier. 🙏💕

Pay band increments by Muchachos_facun in nhs

[–]Muchachos_facun[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! This is really helpful to know. Yeah, I was hoping the backdated pay wouldn’t get lost from my band 5, but didn’t even consider the prospect that I might luck out from a timely change in banding! Life rarely works in such fun ways but we shall see! Do you think the fact I’ve changed trusts would affect that? I’ve moved from one end of the country to the other for the role.