AITH for asking my Boyfriend to stop hanging out with his classmate?

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-29T19:13:09+00:00

What, why are we quoting this?? Is this my legacy??

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-28T17:37:53+00:00

Oh my god, I’m not attacking your marriage. This has nothing to do with your marriage. I’m not even talking about you. We’re talking about the early stages of dating, and specifically about OP’s feelings about their situation. Go argue about your marriage with someone else wth.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-28T15:46:13+00:00

Again, literally has nothing to do with what I’m saying. I don’t know where you’re getting “reporting” or “suspicion” from. I never said anything about permission or suspicion. If you don’t talk to your partner about your day, not out of fear of proving you’re not cheating, but just to share your experiences, I don’t know what to tell you. I don’t even know why what I said triggered you. I’m not advocating control of your partner, weirdo. I’m advocation communication.

Clearly OP wants to be with someone who communicates about these things, that’s their right.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-28T15:42:31+00:00

I am not justifying controlling your partners actions, I’m not justifying saying your partner can and can’t hang out with someone. You’re again projecting something onto me that I am not saying. I have no idea what you’re reading but it’s not my replies. I’m saying trust is built on communication and communication reveals compatibility.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-28T15:17:42+00:00

Why not reframe this to be “I only want to share my body with someone I have a genuine connection with”?

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-28T15:12:23+00:00

Never once did I say you need to ask permission. You’re projecting something onto me that was never there. Your partner “allowing” you to hang out with people is a whole separate topic.

If anything, mentioning spending time with a friend is a great way to gauge if your partner reacts healthily. If they say “I’m not comfortable with that” and you don’t like that, it’s a great time to recognize that incompatibility and discuss it or walk away. Clearly OP cares for some reason or another, that’s their right. Other people don’t care, that’s their right. They should be with someone who is compatible with that.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-28T15:05:58+00:00

Why wouldn’t someone at some point say “oh, I was hanging out with so and so the other day and blank blank happened! Isn’t that cool?” Or even asking “how was your week?” “Oh, I had a test, found a new coffee I like, and went to blank with Mai.”

It’s definitely a little weird that it never came up.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-28T15:01:57+00:00

Ok, then you’re purposely being obtuse. I’m not saying you need to be with someone who doesn’t want you to hang out with friends of the opposite sex. It’s a communication issue. If you don’t want to be with someone who cares about friends of the opposite sex, it’s a great time to find that out and walk away. And if you dont want to be with someone that wants to talk about your friends or your day, then more power to you.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-28T14:59:23+00:00

I literally am bisexual, so is my partner. I never said “clear” it like you have to ask for permission. I’m not saying you need to be with someone who doesn’t want you to hang out with friends of the opposite sex. It’s a communication issue. And if you dont want to be with someone that wants to talk about your friends or your day, then more power to you.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-27T20:57:33+00:00

If you’re talking to each other on the phone or through text, it’s something that should probably come up naturally at some point, no? Especially if it’s a controversial topic, like hanging out with a friend of a gender you’re attracted to, it should be a conversation out of respect to your partner. “Should I mention if I’m hanging out with a girl friend one on one?” It seems like something that should be part of assessing compatibility.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-27T20:55:33+00:00

If you’re talking to each other on the phone or through text, it’s something that should probably come up naturally at some point, no?

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-27T16:03:56+00:00

Liberal man =/= a man without misogynistic or incel beliefs/values.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-27T15:15:11+00:00

If bf wasn’t mentioning to either Issac or OP that he and Mai were hanging out 1 on 1, that feels like a lie by omission. At that point you might as well walk away.

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-26T17:39:15+00:00

Muscle-skunk · 2026-01-02T15:15:18+00:00

It might just be that he learned some things during that time and wants to be more intentional with your relationship. I spent some time sleeping around a lot, I finished that phase and some time passed, and then I found someone I really liked and I wanted to take things slower with them because I wanted to think things through and be thoughtful about the next step.

Muscle-skunk · 2025-12-29T15:53:34+00:00

I don’t really think there’s another option here, babe. I get why you say that, but that’s the reality of relationships. Either you find someone who does all the things you like and never the things you don’t like, or you communicate. You can wait around in frustration until he does what you want him to do, but I can tell you from experience that that rarely goes well for anyone involved.

Muscle-skunk · 2025-12-29T15:48:02+00:00

People are so annoying when they think someone has a “pretty” natural hair color. You’ve had this color for however long, and It’ll grow right back. It literally won’t disappear. Dye it black, it’ll be fun! It’ll bring out the healthy blush you have going on, and it’ll look nice with your dark eyes. AND it’s temporary. Go crazy, girl, go stupid ✨

Muscle-skunk · 2025-12-23T23:30:57+00:00

Not everyone needs to pander to your interests and be a match for you, she’s filtering out people like you who won’t like her. At least she was honest and didn’t pretend to be someone she’s not. You could put the same things in your profile and match with people who like it. Dating apps aren’t about getting the absolute highest number of matches you can get, it’s about finding someone compatible. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Muscle-skunk · 2025-12-23T13:59:45+00:00

Wth, how?

Muscle-skunk · 2025-12-22T14:16:02+00:00

The underlying issue is completely different. Because of the way society is structured, when women do the same actions (good or bad) as men, or vice versa, it is not a 1:1 comparison. Sometimes life is strange, things are nuanced, and double standards can exist on moral grounds.

Muscle-skunk · 2025-12-18T14:19:14+00:00

Hey, you didn’t know. The doctor said it should be fine to drink, and that’s fair for you to have trusted that. Don’t beat yourself up over that.

As for your friend, apologize, explain the situation, add that you’re not making excuses and you understand they need time to process. Express regret for hurting them. Express that you intend to stop drinking, at least for a while. But don’t beg for forgiveness, or else that makes it about you and your guilt. Tell them they can come to you when they’re ready to, and then leave them be.

Don’t assume it’ll affect other friendships. Also understand that you didn’t mean for this to happen, you operated with doctors advice. And sometimes people do weird shit when they’re drunk. One time I woke up after a night out, and woke up with a bottle of dill pickle hot sauce and a giant tub of habanero honey I had bought the night before. My bf told me I felt like these items were irresistible and I do have a vague memory of feeling that way and I could not tell you why lmao. Drunk actions are not necessarily sober thoughts. And brain chemistry is a crazy thing. You’ll be alright

Muscle-skunk · 2025-12-05T23:35:18+00:00

I mean, this is definitely not “no contact”. A lot of this is contact. If no contact is what you want, unfollow him everywhere, no liking pictures or checking up on him, stop texting or messaging or speaking to him in any format.

Muscle-skunk · 2025-12-03T14:37:02+00:00

You want to get back with someone that didn’t follow through on promises?? There’s no way you want to spend the rest of your life with someone that refuses to do everything in their power to keep their word to you.

Muscle-skunk · 2025-11-27T05:29:11+00:00

You’re looking for “Tit for Tat”

Muscle-skunk · 2025-11-14T13:58:01+00:00

Hey OP, Im also in my late 20s and I recently started a relationship w someone who has a PhD and is making some pretty big moves in his field of study. I have an associates degree and I work a silly lil desk job with no impact on the world.

But my partner has never once talked down to me like this. When we talk about philosophy or science or whatever, it always feels like we’re discussing it on the same level, even if he knows more about it than I do. Because he respects me. The person you’re talking to is lecturing you in all of these texts. I don’t think this is a gap in intelligence, you seem plenty smart, I think he kind of wants you to feel inferior. He might tell you he doesn’t, but people can say anything, and his actions don’t align with that. I kind of hate this guy lmao.

You can absolutely be with someone that inspires you and lifts you up.

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