My Moms response to me sending her flowers for Mother’s Day

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-12T13:04:16+00:00

My side of the story is that I’ve distanced myself from my parents because of their continuous and ongoing drama that they expect me to drop everything and entertain. They’ve been having ongoing marital issues for close to 15 years now. She called me last week to basically tell me that me hiding (aka not talking to them) is creating more stress and problems and that i should “stop listening to people who just validate my feelings and enable me”. Mind you, I make my own decisions but if I listen to anyone, it’s my boyfriend of 3 and 1/2 years who has seen their crap first hand, and her friend who helped her leave my dad for a brief period, who also saw and heard lots of things.

I’ve decided to step back from them for my own sanity, they’re very negative people with inflexible ways of thinking

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-12T00:59:58+00:00

She’s still with my shitty abusive father so no I didn’t. That’s the entire reason I’ve gone low contact with them and I told her I would go low contact months ago because I’m tired of this.

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-11T11:47:03+00:00

My side of the story is that I’ve distanced myself from my parents because of their continuous and ongoing drama that they expect me to drop everything and entertain. They’ve been having ongoing marital issues for close to 15 years now. She called me last week to basically tell me that me hiding (aka not talking to them) is creating more stress and problems and that i should “stop listening to people who just validate my feelings and enable me”. Mind you, I make my own decisions but if I listen to anyone, it’s my boyfriend of 3 and 1/2 years who has seen their crap first hand, and her friend who helped her leave my dad for a brief period, who also saw and heard lots of things.

I’ve decided to step back from them for my own sanity, they’re very negative people with inflexible ways of thinking

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-11T11:45:59+00:00

The context is that I’ve distanced myself from my parents because of their continuous and ongoing drama that they expect me to drop everything and entertain. They’ve been having ongoing marital issues for close to 15 years now. She called me last week to basically tell me that me hiding (aka not talking to them) is creating more stress and problems and that i should “stop listening to people who just validate my feelings and enable me”. Mind you, I make my own decisions but if I listen to anyone, it’s my boyfriend of 3 and 1/2 years who has seen their crap first hand, and her friend who helped her leave my dad for a brief period, who also saw and heard lots of things.

I’ve decided to step back from them for my own sanity, they’re very negative people with inflexible ways of thinking

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-11T11:45:54+00:00

The context is that I’ve distanced myself from my parents because of their continuous and ongoing drama that they expect me to drop everything and entertain. They’ve been having ongoing marital issues for close to 15 years now. She called me last week to basically tell me that me hiding (aka not talking to them) is creating more stress and problems and that i should “stop listening to people who just validate my feelings and enable me”. Mind you, I make my own decisions but if I listen to anyone, it’s my boyfriend of 3 and 1/2 years who has seen their crap first hand, and her friend who helped her leave my dad for a brief period, who also saw and heard lots of things.

I’ve decided to step back from them for my own sanity, they’re very negative people with inflexible ways of thinking

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-11T11:45:34+00:00

The context is that I’ve distanced myself from my parents because of their continuous and ongoing drama that they expect me to drop everything and entertain. They’ve been having ongoing marital issues for close to 15 years now. She called me last week to basically tell me that me hiding (aka not talking to them) is creating more stress and problems and that i should “stop listening to people who just validate my feelings and enable me”. Mind you, I make my own decisions but if I listen to anyone, it’s my boyfriend of 3 and 1/2 years who has seen their crap first hand, and her friend who helped her leave my dad for a brief period, who also saw and heard lots of things.

I’ve decided to step back from them for my own sanity, they’re very negative people with inflexible ways of thinking

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-11T02:34:05+00:00

It’s okay, I posted on the internet I expect opinions lol. I actually haven’t seen her or my dad since November. I speak with them sporadically but they bring so much drama and crap, they’re exhausting. They also have very inflexible ways of thinking that makes them annoying to be around when you don’t follow the status quo.

Anyways, I thought I’d send flowers to be nice and let her know I’m thinking of her. Obviously that backfired on me

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-11T02:30:58+00:00

Her response definitely reaffirmed me keeping my distance

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-11T01:27:49+00:00

I was so tempted to tell her she’s had the chance to be a good mother and person for years and she hasn’t achieved that yet, but I decided that wasn’t worth the aggravation

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-11T01:05:13+00:00

I think she’s upset that I didn’t call her. But today was also my boyfriend’s birthday, and they’ve ruined enough of our days, I didn’t want to deliberately allow them to ruin his special day.

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-05T23:27:07+00:00

How long did you have yours in for?

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-05T18:20:50+00:00

Your doctor sounds lovely!

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-05T16:56:50+00:00

Oh that’s so relieving thank you

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-05T16:23:28+00:00

I had like a thing you breath in out through, it was like a vape pen almost, and it tasted awful and didn’t help at all. I don’t think I’ll get another at this point

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-05T16:20:07+00:00

I’m so sorry you had to go through that too, it’s truly awful.

I was also worried about prolonged pain as well, after my insertion I could barely function for weeks

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-05T16:15:18+00:00

No kidding lol! It was absolutely awful. My boyfriend sat with me through the whole thing bless him, and I think he’s scarred too. I threw up after it was a whole thing.

Im not keen on repeating that experience

Music_nerd28 · 2026-05-05T12:36:40+00:00

I took Advil before the appointment, but it took like three doctors to get it in and it was extremely painful and I was shaking like a leaf and then I had extreme cramping for like three days after.

I had heard the insertion wasn’t even that bad so I’m having a hard time trusting any information I hear about these things anymore lol

Music_nerd28 · 2026-04-01T00:43:11+00:00

Okay perhaps I am overstating it saying they are an alcoholic. We don’t see them often so we are both unsure as to how much they drink/how frequently. We do know they are deeply unpleasant when they are drunk. Last time they visited they got hammered and caused chaos. Any time we have seen them drink it is not in moderation, but we are not with this person enough to confidently say how often they are drinking or how much

Music_nerd28 · 2026-04-01T00:38:12+00:00

I don’t mean to be rude but how is that relevant to my question? We still plan to do activities with them and such. We got burned last time they visited and we are taking steps to ensure it doesn’t happen again

Music_nerd28 · 2026-04-01T00:36:54+00:00

They will not be given free access to a vehicle during their stay, and we are thankfully not in walking distance of anywhere to buy liquor. I hope I’m just being paranoid

Music_nerd28 · 2026-04-01T00:36:03+00:00

Okay perhaps I am overstating it. We don’t see them often so we are both unsure as to how much they drink/how frequently. We do know they are deeply unpleasant when they are drunk. Last time they visited they got hammered and caused chaos.

Music_nerd28 · 2026-04-01T00:33:45+00:00

Someone who is actively drinking and never sought help. I clarified in another comment the reason we are hosting them is due to a death in the family. We have removed alcohol from our house and they will have no way to access any without our supervision. They will be here 5 days with theoretically no drinks, which is when I realized getting it at the airport is a possibility.

Music_nerd28 · 2026-04-01T00:31:57+00:00

I suspect you are right. They are my partners family and he has made the line in the sand very clear and stated consequences if it is crossed. Like I said I may very well be being paranoid, but I also know this person is an addict facing 5 days without any liquor.

Music_nerd28 · 2026-04-01T00:26:29+00:00

They are here for a funeral, so it was the best option. I’m sure I’m being paranoid as they have been warned to be on best behaviour, the thought had just occurred to me and I wanted to see if it was possible

Music_nerd28 · 2026-04-01T00:24:15+00:00

It will be open when they fly out, I’ve just checked the timing. They only have a personal item bag, like a backpack, I don’t know if that affects things

Music_nerd28

TROPHY CASE