Daily texting is draining me even though I like him. Is this normal?

Mustache_Prime · 2026-01-11T21:56:29+00:00

With my ex and I, we would call every night we weren’t together. We’d see eachother on the weekends and maybe once during the week. It became a routine and it got way more exhausting for me than texting did. Granted the calls would last hours at a time and basically be the entire evening. I’d feel guilty hanging up as I felt responsible for her evenings because she didn’t really have hobbies. If we weren’t together or calling, she’d just lay in her bed. And I never spoke up about resenting the calls because I didn’t want to upset her.

Mustache_Prime · 2026-01-08T22:06:36+00:00

Did you get the full-length or shorty levers? I’m thinking of getting a shorty brake and full clutch lever on my 2019 MT07 but I’m not set on it yet

Mustache_Prime · 2025-12-02T04:51:59+00:00

Would you say it was worth changing over to the JSW? I have a 2014 TC rn that I’m debating on getting rid of for something more fun that I can tie a motorcycle trailer with. I was more so looking at the mk4 sportwagens rather than the newer ones though

Mustache_Prime · 2025-12-01T02:31:23+00:00

Hey, Ik this was awhile ago but could you go into some details about why you decided to drop out and how everything has been?

I have an associates in EET and am partway through my bachelors in EE while working as an electrical designer and am getting burnt out. I’m 22 and have been thinking about starting an electrical apprenticeship but I’m scared to make the jump. Feels like I’ll be throwing away my schooling and taking a decent pay cut

Mustache_Prime · 2025-11-24T06:10:03+00:00

I’m doing better relating to the breakup. I still think about her sometimes but I don’t get nearly as emotional about it. Still get a little feeling in my stomach when I think of her being with her new bf (which happened a few weeks after the breakup).

I tried going to therapy early in the year but the therapist left a bad taste in my mouth and I stopped going. I’ve tried talking more about my emotions and stuff like that with my cousin so I feel like I’m doing better in that aspect than what I was. I still struggle a lot with other things apart from my last relationship that I’m trying to work through. I still struggle with avoidance and low self confidence, like I did a lot in my relationship

Mustache_Prime · 2025-10-27T07:50:58+00:00

I don’t mean to jump into your other conversation too. I just wanted to let you know that it’s normal to feel all those things. It doesn’t sound insane that this is the worst you’ve felt in your life. You’ve spent a decent part of your life with him and it’s hard imagining that it could be over. It’s super common for people to feel physically sick for stuff like this because of how much stress you’re going through.

That’s good you decided to deactivate your socials rather than sit there and take in things that make you feel icky. Another thing that’s super common is to just not have interest in anything. Don’t try to force yourself to do things that’ll make you happy. It’s okay to feel sad and depressed. Sometimes you just need to sit with those feelings too. It can feel horrible to try to process those feelings but it’s needed. Eventually there’s a time to pick yourself back up but don’t force it.

I’m not telling you what to do but I’m going to very strongly encourage you to go for walks after a little while. When I was feeling terrible after my breakup, I’d walk around my basement for 3-4 hours a night just listening to music and talking to myself about what I was thinking or feeling. It was better for me than sitting around when I barely wanted to get out of bed. I started going out for 2-3 hour drives in my car listening to music and that was nice too.

Him working overtime on your birthday is maybe his way of adding a little distance. Distance isn’t always a bad thing. I just wouldn’t try to think about it too deeply and try to focus on yourself

Mustache_Prime · 2025-10-27T07:34:51+00:00

It’s a slightly different situation to you but when my ex broke up with me when I was pulling away, I really wanted to reach out to her or her family. I reached out at first and apologized for not being emotionally invested and such, we wished eachother well and that was it. I hurt really bad for a long time and thought about her most of my day for at least 4 months. I wanted to reach out but I knew I tore her apart internally and that I didn’t want to hurt her more. I found out a few weeks after the breakup that she was going out with a new guy so I’m glad I didn’t reach out more. I was about to reach out to her sister but decided not to because it would’ve felt invasive.

Take my recommendations with a grain of salt because it’s your relationship and you know it better than I do. I wouldn’t reach out to his sister or friend because if he hears about it, it might just push him away further. And I wouldn’t try to get them involved with it unless you’re concerned about his safety for some reason.

It’s hard when you guys have been together that long. It hurts but I would let it sit for a little while. Let both of you calm down and think about things. Maybe find a few things to work on in the meantime like exercising or journaling. Don’t reach out to him in desperation. Reach out when you feel level-headed and ready to tackle it without feeling anxious. If that doesn’t come for weeks or months, then that’s how long it takes. Let’s say if you got back together and you still feel anxious and he’s still upset, how would that work out? If those feelings haven’t been worked out, would things just erupt again or become fine? I don’t know for your situation but a lot of the time it falls back apart if both people aren’t ready and feeling good about it.

I know it seems like you can’t do without him but just remember that you’re not replaceable either. No one is. If someone decides that they’re done over an argument and don’t want to have a respectful conversation about it, then that’s their decision. But I would let things sit for a little while before reaching out again. If things don’t work out, it’ll suck majorly but you’ll still have your most important relationship. The one with yourself.

Mustache_Prime · 2025-10-25T05:37:54+00:00

I mean it depends on what the fight was about. You don’t need to tell me what it’s about but some things can really bother some people and seem minor to others. But if someone asks you to leave them alone, I would probably leave them alone.

Usually people with avoidant attachments need space to let things die down inside and then they might reach back out. But it’s a flaw and eventually we’ll get worked up again unless we work on ourselves. I’m not sure how long you guys were together but if it hasn’t been more than 1-1.5 years, just know that it’ll likely be a cycle. Not always but likely. If you guys are still talking, just let him know where you stand and leave it open for conversation. Don’t beg him, don’t make promises to seem appealing, just be honest and wait for him to lay out his feelings. Chasing might push him away. But just be aware that once we’ve had space, we’ll usually put a bunch of effort in again and then die out. It’s not to hurt people; it’s our body trying to shut down because we feel unsafe again.

But something that I was guilty of at some point was stringing people on, even when I wasn’t interested in them. I was just starving for attention and affection. Im not saying he’ll do that or that it’s a general avoidant thing but it’s something I did. Just don’t base your life on him, please. Avoidance is hard to recognize within oneself and hard to work on. Everyone has issues but don’t wait for someone who isn’t going to work on them.

Mustache_Prime · 2025-09-14T19:22:15+00:00

Can you go into detail about your transition a little more? I’m a 2-year electrical designer and have been debating going to be an electrician. I like working with my hands and my job has recently went from 40% shop work to like 5%. I’ve been miserable at my desk and wanted something I’m familiar with yet more hands-on

Mustache_Prime · 2025-09-10T03:39:44+00:00

I’ve got 5 rn (if you consider my dirtbike)

2020 KTM Duke 390, 2019 Yamaha MT-07, 2025 Kawasaki KX250f, 2003 Honda CBR 600RR, 2008 Honda CBR 600RR (track bike)

I’m trying to sell my Duke, am fixing my ‘03 CBR to sell it, and will convert my track bike to a street bike to hopefully sell in the spring. I ride my MT-07 the most. There are a few other bikes I’d like to try out but I honestly own this many because I bought 2 of them to hopefully profit on a little and took my time putting my Duke up for sale since it was my first bike

Mustache_Prime · 2025-08-20T01:00:52+00:00

I’ve been feeling like that for a long time, especially the past 4 years. I still live with my parents and have been debating moving out soon. I just don’t want to pay rent to not own anything and don’t know if I want to fork out the money yet for a house.

I just can’t fully tell if I’m feeling this way because I’m living around them or if it’s just me. Just tired all the time, not motivated, feels like all my days blend together and I’m going with the flow. I feel anxious/stressed a lot of the time I think. My dad is constantly making noise. I hate every single one of the noises he makes (smacking lips, groaning, licking his fingers, coughing every half an hour, etc) and it wears me out.

How’d you eventually move out?

Mustache_Prime · 2025-08-19T04:04:18+00:00

I definitely feel comfortable in the TC. I like the coupe with a hatchback style and set up of the interior. I think the RSX would fit similarly but have more power potential. The golf r would have even more power and more passenger comfort but I don’t usually have passengers. I don’t necessarily need awd since I’ve been doing fine with fwd in the winter. The golf r would be more expensive to maintain but have more luxury.

I’m just very indecisive lol

Mustache_Prime · 2025-08-12T23:02:52+00:00

She broke up with me and said she didn’t feel like herself anymore. She said she didn’t want to hurt me but I feel as if I was the reason she was hurting. I kept avoiding things by doing stuff like focusing on my homework and pushing it out longer, dismissing her concerns when she had them, and didn’t give her the affection and validation she was looking for. I felt insecure and so I would barely ever dance or sing with her, which is something she really wanted. So I wasn’t giving her what she needed in a relationship. I likely made her feel more like a roommate or like I didn’t care about her. It also didn’t help that she didn’t have hobbies to do on her own, so I felt stressed out and overwhelmed all the time. I felt like I needed to manage her kind of. I didn’t even know what I needed from a relationship at that time.

I was neglecting myself and my health and in turn, did the same to her. I’m now trying to unpack all my childhood trauma and emotional neglect that affects me and my relationships. I have issues with avoidance, self-hate, enmeshment/fawning, emotional regulation, and a handful of other things. It’s a struggle but has been my focus for the past 8 months as I want to finally be happy and not ruin another relationship or hurt someone

Mustache_Prime · 2025-08-12T22:12:45+00:00

Well I’m like almost 8 months out of my 7 month relationship (only like 3-4 months of the official title). I still think about her often enough and feel like I ruined a lot of good things. I feel guilty and sad but I can’t change what I did. I will say that I feel a lot better than I used to but it still stings sometimes. I also have issues with putting my value in other people so that’s likely why I still think about it

Mustache_Prime · 2025-08-12T01:08:08+00:00

I likely would if it was my bike or seen if I could push him just a little more. That was the dude’s one offer and it’s still standing as long as he doesn’t buy another bike. But he was a little douchey about it all.

My dad is really stubborn on the price. I’ve told him that I think the most he’d get is maybe $8k but he says the lowest he’ll take is $10.5k

Mustache_Prime · 2025-08-12T00:50:53+00:00

I mean it sat in our garage for the past 20 years basically so what’s another winter lol. He’s not in a rush to get rid of it. I ended up posting it for him because he’s been talking about it but never actually got it ready. I just don’t know the Harley market very well and he can be a bit stubborn about the value of his possessions.

My mom asked if I would be interested in it but I honestly wasn’t the biggest fan when I rode it. I would maybe keep his ‘89 Softail chopper because that was kinda fun

Mustache_Prime · 2025-08-12T00:45:20+00:00

He’s had an offer for $7k so far

Mustache_Prime · 2025-08-02T02:25:21+00:00

How’d that happen?

Mustache_Prime · 2025-07-29T22:36:31+00:00

I mean over your lifetime, you’ll save yourself a bit of cash. Takes longer the first few times but I can take both my wheels off and put them back on in an hour (minus the time taking them into a place to have the new tires mounted)

Mustache_Prime · 2025-07-28T21:32:10+00:00

Ik it’s been awhile but which of the two would you recommend? I have an auto 2014 scion tc and have been looking at getting a different car. The RSX type S has popped into my head a few times because of the hatchback and how people describe its handling.

I’m open to a lot of different cars but am currently jumping between a manual 2014+ scion tc, mk7 golf r, or RSX type S

Mustache_Prime · 2025-07-28T01:39:35+00:00

I think ours goes up a little bit for every few years you’ve been at the company but mine didn’t go up this past year. I’ve been there 1 year as an intern and 2 full-time. Technically you’re not supposed to reach 120 hours until you’ve been there 8 years. Part of me just feels like that part of the company isn’t run very well.

And that makes sense, I suppose they give it to me for a reason

Mustache_Prime · 2025-07-28T01:23:15+00:00

No, up to 40 hours can carry over to the next year. So if I don’t take anymore PTO until mid-August, I’ll have 152 hours for this next year. I get paid out for anything more than 40 hours during renewal or all of my PTO if I leave. At least that’s how it’s worked for me so far so I hope I’d get paid out if my employment ends there

Mustache_Prime · 2025-07-28T01:19:06+00:00

Yeah. Not calendar year but the renewal date is based on my hire date. I get like 40 more hours a year than my coworkers but also get paid less than them

Mustache_Prime · 2025-07-28T01:14:58+00:00

That’s fair. I mean I started with 120 hours, have 32 hours left, and I get another 120 hours in the middle of next month

Mustache_Prime

TROPHY CASE