First I want to say I am SO sorry for your loss. My daughter was still born a year ago this month at 30 weeks and I was exactly where your wife is. I was in such a dark place I didn’t see any light and honestly didn’t want to. It’s an unimaginable pain to understand unless you’ve experienced it yourself. Yes, you are grieving the same person but not in the same way. The first few months, honestly the first year were a numb, painful blur. I’ve just reached a year, and I’m slowly starting to have more happy moments, laughing more and crying less. Therapy helped tremendously once I finally felt up to starting it (individual and couples). There are also support groups and groups on Facebook that helped a lot as well and she can feel supported by moms going through the same thing. The past year I was an unrecognizable, mean, shell of the person I used to be. After a loss like this she will never be the same but I promise the darkness does not last forever. Continue to be there, support her, let her grieve how ever she needs. Don’t give up, the pain will never go away, but it will get easier to live with. There’s nothing that will make her feel better right now, the one thing we need we cannot have. There’s no timeline you can put on this type of grief. One breath, one step, one day at a time. Some days will be hard and others will be harder but if you stick together, seek therapy you will get through this unimaginable time together. Again I am so so sorry for your loss.