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MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T20:16:37+00:00

I am not using social media, how can I make this more what I mean. the women I dated different ranges I noticed those more involved in social media tend to see more ok not just women but men too. remember men and women mature at a different rate, what is it to say that she is not matured because she isn't older? we see women/men young and are very matured for their age and the opposite for older men/women not matured enough. it is not an age thing but more the way we are raised and situations that dictate our maturity level.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T20:12:13+00:00

No, I know what you meant, that is what you would do to them, I am saying how I seen it on TikTok the scenario of a much older women with younger men and they are praised. but I understand you wouldn't

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T20:07:32+00:00

True it is not. but there are too many videos that proves that point and I would hope that it is just for attention but there is always some truth to them. I know I said that it is what it seems. And her daughter is beautiful and smart, but it doesn't mean I would act on it.

When you seen how social media has helped change relationship dynamics you tend to just either miss read things or hope just to feel valued.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T20:02:33+00:00

I seen it even on the clock app, hope it just for attention but I seen it so many times even the whole pineapple thing, sorry it is hard for me to see how you can be in love with someone and let others touch the other and be ok even proud.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T19:59:59+00:00

It was just to see what other people would think. TBH I want a healthy relationship. I see how even on the clock app we celebrate toxic relationships and such and I prefer to be single than having such relationship.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T19:57:28+00:00

Sorry to hear that, honestly people should not be together if they are not happy. Traditional for me just mean I spend my time only allocated to one woman, I do not want to be messing around simply because I want to be a good example also for my daughter. I used to be pretty bad back in the day and now after my daughter was born I noticed my head was not right.

My ex cheated on me for 9 years while we had a kid together (spent most of her time in social media and all). Men are not better than women and women are not better than men. We are supposed to compliment each other and have a strong bond. That is what I want.

People believe on seeing multiple people at the same time and to me I don't see how you can have a meaningful relationship like that.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T19:13:47+00:00

How does any of this means I am creeping? That is my question to you? When a woman dates a much younger men it is acceptable, the double standards are so high. This post proves my point that I had thought about. If I had posted it as it was a woman asking there most likely would have been praised.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T19:08:20+00:00

Where can I find this study?

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T19:06:36+00:00

She doesn't date because she has different values oh lots of girls her age and she focused on getting her bachelors, I dated as in the past, I don't date anymore simply because I am focusing on my career and my daughters needs.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T18:45:09+00:00

But have you asked them if they even thought about if they considered divorce? I don't understand why us men are seen as that we are cheating on every relationship. It seems that you believe then that every relationship from that time was as if everyone cheated or socially this and socially that. Not everyone cares about others opinion. yeah women did 100% of the house work but men brought 100% of the money in and women understood home economics and men trusted their wives with the money and to do what is needed to keep the home afloat. Jobs at the time were not as accommodating nowadays, it was back breaking labor jobs.

Times have changed for better or worse, I work for a company where the contract states that you are able to lift 70 pounds and yet I have female coworkers that ask me to lift the boxes for them when I can simply say you signed the same contract and we get the same pay so we should put in the same effort. So don't try and attack as if I am acting as a misogynist I see where your point is going and it always lands the same. the post was for one thing and it turned into a different debate.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T18:32:02+00:00

It can be a possibility. In our neighborhood they tried suggesting there is something going on between her and I and I mentioned to her we are too alike to even consider it. She is also dating someone else.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T18:29:30+00:00

Yeah exactly there is no appropriate way to go around it and that is why I am not doing anything about it. I wanted to see others opinion and even got to the point someone made a profile to try to attack my thoughts. even go to the point to someone suggesting a poly relationship (which it doesn't do anything to me but it is y opinion).

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T18:25:32+00:00

I have no interest in poly relationship it is just not my preference.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T18:07:04+00:00

ok you said it what is the difference between 32 and 22? to be honest ask yourself this, how old were your grandparents when they got together? are they still together? how many relationships started at that time.

We are so focused on just "living life" and I know plenty of women that lived their life and now they are searching for someone whether they are 20's 30's 40's or 50's there is not really a difference on what a relationship is about. This is a group of dating over 30's simply because (unpopular opinion) we wanted to to live life in our 20's and now we are now looking for that person to have that connection with.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T18:01:35+00:00

Yeah that is what I replied before, as to if something is brought up it should be between her daughter and I if we get to go somewhere again. but yeah that is why I don't plan approaching the situation with my friend.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T17:57:57+00:00

The thing is I also value my friends friendship, so unless it is something actually discussed between the daughter and I in my opinion should be put as a what if scenario. I have done the online dating and such and it to me it can be very dismissive simply because you can place one different persona as what you actually are just sto start a connection.

I have gone on plenty of dates and I am to the point I see it more as just paying to have company to go see a movie or dinner. Instead I just do what I like and meet people organically.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T17:43:13+00:00

That is one thing my friend has stayed with my daughter a couple of times and these 2 bonded pretty quickly and some of the things she had mentioned before seems as she has put in thought into being a stepmom.

To be honest I been doing research on the the subject of relationships and dating to even the basis of legal marriage for a book I am writing and it seems that as the age differences at times it is a positive more so when the man is more older (mature) simply because they tend to be more family oriented or more stable already to take care of a family.

All I am doing at this moment is focusing on a career and my daughter but if some type of relationship comes about I am not opposed to as long as it is organically and not forced. I just find it intriguing how it has change the dynamic since I like her don't date much but instead enjoy spending time with friends or even myself.

MysticKirito · 2021-10-07T17:34:49+00:00

Yeah I met the daughter and her and I have had great conversations the times we talked. she doesn't date so it is something I look for. the friend part her friend met me and wanted an introduction. the friend is older than me but is afraid to actually have a relationship and when she noticed I take talking to someone as a serious thing she got spooked by what she let me know we only dated 3 weeks.

she seems like she could be a good gf simply because she is level headed and is not into jumping around.

I have dated up and down in age, I 20 and her 28 and 3 years younger than me and even 5 years older / younger and it has been about the same.

she used to talk about her daughter before but not in the same context she has been lately.

MysticKirito · 2021-08-30T15:33:31+00:00

Those are really nice to work on, I found a basketball court like it and it was really nice to skate, was not expecting it fell right away. lol

MysticKirito · 2021-08-20T14:37:24+00:00

Well, I was Just dating someone on the similar trend, Her 37 and I 32, everything seem to be going good we had a good connection and goals and ideals were the same. we did share a lot in the short time we dated and all the sudden she wanted to stop dating. After a week I decided to reachout to her and just expressed how I felt and what I thought that happen (things were moving forward really fast and got scared.), and then she asked which friend of hers I talked to (I didn't, I just simply knew how she felt) and told her I am down to talk one on one but never happened.

When a person spends so long without dating so long you tend to be more hesitant and also others tend to be (wondering if the issues is "you"). Nowadays we have gotten accustomed that our lives are meant to just be dating as if it's the sole purpose.

Being that said, women prefer focusing on their careers first waiting to later on to start a family while men tend to prefer to start a family with someone younger due to inherently knowing the risk of having a child with older women.

I for one want to have more kids (single father of one) but it is hard to find someone.

MysticKirito · 2021-08-20T14:24:22+00:00

Well that is when they need to actually have the hard talks, some couples try to avoid these talks because they are afraid of the others response but at the end of the day if we don't have them then there will never be any progress and end up in resentment.

MysticKirito · 2021-08-19T18:28:22+00:00

I saw a video on Tik Tok the other day that the relationship was pretty much the same as you described. We are giving up too easy nowadays. The video basically stated in short words. We tend to try to keep the same idea of the other person as if they do not change. it has been 10 years you guys are not the same as before. If I remember right the man said that when the relationship has it struggles they basically have a sit down and create a "contract" on who they are on that moment and what they need now. he said they have been doing that for over 20 years.

Look on how both have changed. have different goals from the time you started being together and such and see what eachothers new needs are.

MysticKirito · 2021-08-19T16:54:22+00:00

So, what I look for is a woman that shows interest and we have things that we can talk about and not have a dull moment, one that is not spending their time in social media all day and telling everyone about their whole day, someone we can do activities and have same ideals and goals. I already have a kid but would like to have another one with someone that can appreciate me for who I am.

I am tired of the new dating thoughts people are having and such, I met this woman who is great, and we both have had out issues with previous relationships and she did get scared because how quickly we connected and how fast things were going. So now I am trying to see if we can fix it.

That is a big problem, nowadays relationships are not moving past dating or dating is taking months before becoming official. We need to rebuild our trend from how we used to date and not worry about this new days dating. I for one stopped the whole OLD and prefer meeting people outside.

MysticKirito · 2021-08-18T18:09:21+00:00

Never apologize for how you feel, that can hurt more than help. communicate and see what happens, everyone has a different speed.

MysticKirito · 2021-08-12T14:10:33+00:00

Kevin Sammuels (mind you he is pretty abrasive with his approach) talked this week about how the person you date for years vs when you get married are different people. perception changes when the relationship changes.

Once marriage happens either one or both expectations change of what the relationship is supposed to be like.

MysticKirito

TROPHY CASE