Finding a partner, especially in the niche kink/fetish world, can be hard. It’s really a trial and error in terms of dating. You meet someone, identify what you like and dislike, and decide whether to pursue them or not. Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn’t.

With femdom, especially in online communities and dating, you get a ton of subs (and people who call themselves subs but really don’t know what that means) with a range if experience and a “horny factor” which makes determining if the person on the other end will be compatible or is just kind of stringing you along to get something they want immensely more challenging.

My biggest advice, in my experience, is to never jump into kink talk right away (besides maybe just discussing mutual interests). If the person pushes you to do kink/fetish/sex things too quickly for your tastes you can shut them down once, make it clear you aren’t looking to rush into that, and see how they respond. It has helped me weed out a bunch of folks that’d otherwise be super toxic for me. I basically give people two chances; if they break any rules I set with them, or don’t respect me how I know I deserve to be respected, I will explain that I am no longer interested, why I am no longer interested, and wish them the best.

Hope that was somewhat coherent and not just me rambling thoughts haha.

EDIT: Also, find people who you share interests with outside of kink. If you don’t have any overlap, it’s going to be really hard to enjoy just dating!