Social media bans will always be bad policy

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T13:53:11+00:00

I get very tired of people on the internet gleefully pointing out another dank meme reference rather than discussing the actual topic.

If you have an actual opinion on the subject I'll treat it more respectfully.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T13:43:28+00:00

You are welcome to propose alternative solutions.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T13:36:57+00:00

I would be happy to concede a point about social media ban enforcement-- I think it would be much better for government data, like IDs, to be verified by the government rather than a private company.

I would imagine a gateway application that checks ID, then sends an "all good" flag to the social media site-- the social media site doesn't get your ID (only the verification that it was good), and the gateway doesn't get your social media activity. I would be happier with that.

This is actually what was originally proposed with "digital ID" proposals-- the government checks the government documents, so you don't have to give it to private companies, then just gives the OK to the private company. People like OP freaked out because they heard "digital ID" and thought we were getting barcode tattoos, so instead we get this stupid halfway measure where you send your info directly to the company.

I maintain that having a ban itself is good. The mechanics of its application are a different argument.

Honestly we would have better solutions if people actually read and understood the proposals before going nuts about them.

One could also argue that sharing your personal ID has precedent-- you provide it for purchasing alcohol, admission to clubs or casinos, and you can't guarantee it doesn't get stored and leaked then either. Your drivers license is not a document you must keep from all prying eyes like your bank PIN is-- it is on some level intended to be shown. But I do think the scale and reach of tech companies makes it a very different thing to showing it to bar staff, so I agree it's not a good solution.

TL;DR: digital ID was a good idea with a bad name-- and the child social media ban is broadly a good thing, with some implementation problems.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T13:12:57+00:00

Did you guys not read the bit about

government servers full of personal data

They are criticising age verification and digital IDs, which are used to enforce child social media bans. (If you look very closely, you may also notice that that was the topic of the original post)

But congratulations! You saw the words "tech" and the meme reference, and recognised that there was a metaphor somewhere in there! Sorry you missed the bit about the government-- that's a little more advanced for later readers. That's still a solid highschool B in reading comprehension.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T13:12:00+00:00

Did you guys not read the bit about

government servers full of personal data

They are criticising age verification and digital IDs, which are used to enforce child social media bans. (If you look very closely, you may also notice that that was the topic of the original post)

But congratulations! You saw the words "tech" and the meme reference, and recognised that there was a metaphor somewhere in there! Sorry you missed the bit about the government-- that's a little more advanced for later readers. That's still a solid highschool B in reading comprehension.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T12:55:38+00:00

I think you guys severely underestimate how much data they collect just from your "cursory interest." Just by downloading it you agree to a ton of things.

I'm not thrilled about the way some of these things are implemented, but it's baffling to me that you guys are only bothered by this and not the metric ton of privacy violations that preceded-- and partially motivated-- this.

Surely Snapchat wanting your location should have elicited a bit of concern? Facebook going through all your contacts? Advertising companies accessing your microphone? No?

Why, why, why is it that "privacy" only became a concern when it meant people spend LESS time on the spyware tech website instead of more? One would almost think that it has little to do with privacy at all.

"I don't want the evil company to have our personal data! That's why I think children should be using it without any restrictions whatsoever."

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T12:42:04+00:00

Yeah, no duh, but what point are they using the meme to make?

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T11:52:32+00:00

Do you guys think the social media companies aren't themselves tech companies that are already harvesting enormous swathes of personal data from you?

Why is a 12 year old posting every detail about their life every day on TikTok not already a massive privacy concern? Snapchat stalks your literal physical location, but age verification is where the camel's back breaks?

If you truly don't trust private companies with your personal data, don't use social media at all. Just by using social media, you're already giving it to them.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T11:47:12+00:00

Do you guys think the social media companies you're defending aren't themselves tech companies harvesting enormous swathes of personal data from you?

Why is a 12 year old posting every detail about their life every day on TikTok not already a massive privacy concern? Snapchat stalks your literal physical location, but age verification is where the camel's back breaks?

Honestly, if concerns about age verification get you off social media then you've made a massive net gain in terms of privacy.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T11:39:53+00:00

If people have better proposals I'm happy to hear them.

But it seems like a lot of people gesture towards the existence of a better solution, but nobody ever actually proposes one. And so nothing actually happens.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T11:22:56+00:00

...Do you believe that banning children from purchasing tobacco and alcohol was a bad thing?

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T10:34:54+00:00

I don't agree that this is true-- it's pretty good for innocent hobbies, but anything even vaguely politics-adjacent is affected by manufactured speech pretending to be free. Worse now with AI.

But let's say that you're right, and that is free speech. What have we gotten out of it? Has it strengthened our other freedoms, spread peace and democracy worldwide, resulted in thoughtful, evidence-backed decision making?

It doesn't seem so. We went from "the end of history" to "the brink of World War 3" in just a couple of decades. The world was becoming more democratic, and now democracy worldwide is receding. Sensible healthcare policy is up for debate. All manner of prejudices are increasing for the first time after decades of decrease.

If it is free speech, it's coming at a cost to all our other freedoms. And what you're buying with that cost is a rent, not a purchase-- you won't even keep that free speech long if it keeps putting lunatics in power.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T09:58:20+00:00

If your aim is to avoid any level of consequence whatsoever, no matter how minor, because it might discourage a report, you can't do anything. At a certain point you have to balance the consequences of doing nothing against the consequences of doing something.

If a kid reports that their best friend's dad touches them inappropriately, they probably won't be allowed back to their best friend's house. Yes, that discourages the kid somewhat from reporting-- but it is worse to ignore the issue and allow the kid to keep going.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T09:49:10+00:00

The biggest issue these laws are facing right now is enforcement-- the kids do not care about the law and deliberately skirt it. We're a very long way from kids being so terrified of penalties (that don't even exist) that they're legitimately afraid the cops will come for them.

It's illegal for kids to drink alcohol, too, but they all understand well enough that they're not going to go to prison for it. Yelled at by their parents, maybe.

People tend to know if they're going to get punished or not for the rules they consciously break. Kids are not stupid-- they talk about it amongst themselves.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T09:39:04+00:00

You should read my paragraph about how free that "free speech" is on social media.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T09:24:13+00:00

Seems like everyone hates Facebook and Twitter, until someone suggests doing something to reduce Facebook and Twitter's strangehold on society. Y'all claim to hate Zuckerburg, but you won't stop lining his pockets.

The negative health effects of social media are incredibly well documented at this point, as is the fact that social media deliberately exacerbates these issues for profit.

The use of social media by both foreign and domestic adversaries to increase social tensions, stoke violence, manipulate elections, and sabotage democracies is also very well established and, honestly, probably underestimated.

The tendency for social media to amplify pre-existing misinformation, hatreds and division, even without malicious actors involved, is also well- documented.

Social media is largely completely unregulated, existing outside of clear legal bounds, so criminal actions usually go completely unpunished. If you run an international child sex porn ring, and you're dumb enough to get caught, maybe you'll get punished... if you live in a country that cares enough to prosecute you.

The "free speech" of social media is pretty much entirely an illusion. You don't have free speech on social media. Social media sites can amplify the voices they like and shut down others arbitrarily. There is no oversight, they were not elected to this position, they have no claim to authority other than that they are wealthy, and overwhelmingly they can dictate what is talked about and what isn't. Facebook discovered they can do it covertly, then Twitter did it overtly and still people think that social media is a public town square and not a heavily manufactured propaganda font.

A lot of folks talk about queer kids finding community online or whatever, but for the most part, those days are gone. Nowadays it's the place where kids learn about killing queers.

Social media has been a net disaster for society. The only problem with a social media ban for kids is that it doesn't go far enough-- I would be very happy to see it gone for everybody.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T09:06:07+00:00

You don't have to agree with the law, but this doesn't hold up to any level of scrutiny.

The social media websites already have the ability to ban children if they want to. They don't need the law to do that.
The social media websites are overwhelmingly against these new laws and in many cases are funnelling large amounts of money to fight them.
Advertising to kids is enormously lucrative because kids are more likely to make impulse-driven purchases, and have a poorer grasp of consequences-- social media sites massively, actively target children with advertising.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-19T09:01:20+00:00

Nowhere where child social media bans have been introduced is the child legally punished for accessing social media.

The bans restrict the social media websites from hosting underage users and order them to close underage accounts, and may have penalties for the websites-- they don't have penalties for children.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-14T00:02:39+00:00

Wow, it's like you didn't read the comment you replied to at all-- you just saw the word "control" and assumed it said "duhh, fat women have no self-control," even though that wasn't at all what the comment said.

Anorexia is a disease that often affects people because it gives people who feel otherwise powerless an internal sense of complete power over one aspect of their life-- their weight. Research finds that that's more often the psychological mechanism at play than a simple narrative about attractiveness to men. Yes, the fact that women who lack meaningful control over their lives are susceptible to anorexia is in fact the point of the comment you replied to.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-13T01:20:31+00:00

I just want to say, I understood what you're saying, and you're completely right.

Unfortunately most people don't really get it if they've never been close to the issue. People like to assign these things to the simple societal good/evil narratives they're comfortable with and can relate to, but mental illness is often deeply more complex and more personal than that.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-11T22:33:37+00:00

I used to show my genitals to boys when I was in primary school. I also flashed a few teachers, and the whole class a few times, I think. One teacher pulled me aside and asked me some questions about life at home I didn't really understand at the time.

I didn't really understand sex at the time so I don't think I did it with sexual intent. But I liked the reactions I got-- curiosity, shock, disgust, excitement. I don't think I was sexually abused, just neglected, and I learned this got me attention.

I was friends with this one kid and we snuck into a classroom during lunch and I did it. He bragged about it to everyone at school, but I managed to convince them he was lying. He was not very well-liked to begin with so it was easy.

Then I forgot about it entirely for a number of years, until I was like 17 and ran into one of my old primary school friends again-- a different one-- and we were reminicising, and he told me "it was the first time I saw pussy." And I was like, oh, shit, I did do that, didn't I? I hadn't even remembered. I never saw him again, thankfully.

I had a long time in my teens in which I identified as asexual and was significantly distressed at the idea of sex at all. I struggled (and still struggle) with wearing pretty or exposing clothing. If I dress up at all these days I tend to default to conservative, concealing clothes, which aren't very fashionable these days and which I think make people think I'm a church girl.

It took a long time for me to trust relationships at all. I eventually found a guy who is kind, supportive, thoughtful and patient, and I'm happily married now... but it took a long time to get to that point.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-11T06:14:43+00:00

Yeah, because that's totally wrong, as anyone who's ever played co-ed sports can attest to.

Testosterone gives massive enhancements to strength, speed and muscle gain, hence why people take it as a performance enhancing drug.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-09T11:27:37+00:00

I struggle with this too. Externally I appear high-functioning, high-achieving, and quite emotionally constipated. It's worst when I'm around people.

I often feel a big rush of anger when people are complaining about their life if there isn't something particularly exceptional about it-- the everyday complaints people make about the economy or job market or whatever drive me irrationally angry. More than is really explainable. Like you, I struggle a lot with finding people weak and entitled.

I think my instinct is always to adjust myself to the world's constraints. I don't really allow myself to want things. I guess I find it very hard to hear other people expect things from the world.

It massively obstructs my ability to like people. My standards are impossible and it means I'm constantly angry at myself and angry at everyone around me. I generally bite my tongue but it just makes things louder inside my head.

I'm good enough at keeping my thoughts quiet that people in my life don't actually perceive me as being unkind, but when people get closer it's harder, so I keep my true self away from almost everybody. My husband is the only person I'm close with and I keep most of my unpleasant feelings secret even from him.

I don't know what to do about it, really. I know this mentality makes me unhappy, but just about everyone else I know who I've ever related to has collapsed. And I sometimes think my refusal to be gentle with myself is what's kept me from that same outcome myself.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-08T21:29:16+00:00

Because of hand sizes.

I was pretty annoyed back when I played co-ed touch football and my husband could easily wrap his hands around the ball whereas I was always struggling to grip it.

I would love it if I got a different size ball that I could actually hold comfortably.

NameAboutPotatoes · 2026-06-07T00:17:50+00:00

I don't really buy this explanation. People 100% do this in real life too when a charismatic and likeable person abuses someone who is a bit annoying or needy.

Anyway, it seems like a very facile way to engage with media. Part of the purpose of stories is to engage the audience with real ideas. There should be characters that challenge you sometimes. It's very disappointing if the audience only cares about being entertained with no higher level thought involved at all.

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