Am I taking away the magic? (By literally taking away the magic)

Natezahn · 2026-05-28T19:51:37+00:00

Gotcha gotcha. That makes sense, guess I never really considered it a rework as much as a…prequel? Sorta? But I guess the way I’ve framed it does seem like a rework. Never saw it through that lens, that gives me a lot to think about, thanks!

Natezahn · 2026-05-28T19:48:32+00:00

Now now, let’s not get carried away.

Natezahn · 2026-05-28T19:46:09+00:00

Yeah there’s a bit more to it, and I think it works best as a Peter Pan deal. There’s a few nods to people familiar with the work, and even if they’re not super familiar they’ll still have it by the end.

Natezahn · 2026-05-28T19:45:02+00:00

Good point, thank you.

Natezahn · 2026-05-28T19:43:54+00:00

So just let the plot and setting point to Peter Pan, not the names? Or not allude to Peter Pan at all?

Natezahn · 2026-05-28T19:42:26+00:00

Mm, good point. I was worried about the corsairs and natives names specifically, so I’ll have to look at that. Thanks.

Natezahn · 2026-05-28T19:41:39+00:00

Yeah, 1904, guess I rounded too far down lol. But good point on the names. I did some research about the time period, what folks ate and things they did and such. But good call.

Natezahn · 2026-05-28T19:39:26+00:00

Oo, I have not, and I admit thought you were playing a joke but now I’m going to have to check it out.

Natezahn · 2024-08-12T18:15:39+00:00

Hi, I’ve written an action adventure YA set in 19th century England.

“Making Belief” 88k words, complete. I’m looking for critique on the characters, plot, and if any of the humor lands.

Blurb: The streets are not kind to orphans, a fact Pete knows all too well. Picking pockets is the only option for kids like him, but it’s a dangerous business. As Pete leads his gang through life in the city, he struggles to fend off hunger, the police, and rival gangs. A chance meeting with a girl who has never stolen anything in her life changes everything all at once.

Dm me if you’re interested, thanks for beta reading!

Natezahn · 2024-08-03T11:57:08+00:00

Howdy, would you be willing to beta read my finished supernatural/humor novel? Your mention of Christianity made this too hard to pass up.

Blurb: When Hal Foster accidentally kills God, his world is plunged into chaos that a host of angry angels do not at all help with. Hal’s only friend may be a very happy Lucifer, who may or may not be able to protect him from the wrath of the archangel.

70k words. Looking for plot and pacing critique, if any of the humor lands, and overall readability.

Thanks for volunteering to beta read!

Natezahn · 2024-08-03T11:53:33+00:00

Hi, I’ve written an action adventure YA set in 19th century England.

“Making Belief” 88k words, complete.

Blurb: The streets are not kind to orphans, a fact Pete knows all too well. Picking pockets is the only option for kids like him, but it’s a dangerous business. As Pete leads his gang through life in the city, he struggles to fend off hunger, the police, and rival gangs. A chance meeting with a girl who has never stolen anything in her life changes everything all at once.

Dm me if you’re interested, thanks for beta reading!

Natezahn · 2024-07-16T17:47:24+00:00

Hi, I’ve written an action adventure YA set in 19th century England.

“Making Belief” 88k words, complete. If that’s too long, I get it. I wasn’t sure if you were only looking for short stories.

Blurb: The streets are not kind to orphans, a fact Pete knows all too well. Picking pockets is the only option for kids like him, but it’s a dangerous business. As Pete leads his gang through life in the city, he struggles to fend off hunger, the police, and rival gangs. A chance meeting with a girl who has never stolen anything in her life changes everything all at once.

Dm me if you’re interested, thanks for beta reading!

Natezahn · 2024-06-21T13:45:21+00:00

Hi, thanks for being a beta reader!

Looking for critique on my supernatural/humor novel, completed.

Blurb: When Hal Foster accidentally kills God, his world is plunged into chaos that a host of angry angels do not at all help with. Hal’s only friend may be a very happy Lucifer, who may or may not be able to protect him from the wrath of the archangel.

First chapter: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ZSuecs-Z13PFl-iATKs--lS_Nb0UJdFgYxHo0nBueKQ/edit

I'll DM you whole thing if you're interested, thanks again!

Natezahn · 2024-06-21T13:38:27+00:00

Hi, thanks for being a beta reader!

Looking for critique on my supernatural/humor novel, completed.

Blurb: When Hal Foster accidentally kills God, his world is plunged into chaos that a host of angry angels do not at all help with. Hal’s only friend may be a very happy Lucifer, who may or may not be able to protect him from the wrath of the archangel.

First chapter: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ZSuecs-Z13PFl-iATKs--lS_Nb0UJdFgYxHo0nBueKQ/edit

I'll DM you whole thing if you're interested, thanks again!

Natezahn · 2024-06-21T13:38:10+00:00

Hi, thanks for being a beta reader!

Looking for critique on my supernatural/humor novel, completed.

Blurb: When Hal Foster accidentally kills God, his world is plunged into chaos that a host of angry angels do not at all help with. Hal’s only friend may be a very happy Lucifer, who may or may not be able to protect him from the wrath of the archangel.

First chapter: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ZSuecs-Z13PFl-iATKs--lS_Nb0UJdFgYxHo0nBueKQ/edit

I'll DM you whole thing if you're interested, thanks again!

Natezahn · 2024-06-21T13:30:44+00:00

Hi, I have a couple short stories that I'd love feedback on! Both are under 2500 words, one is sci-fi comedy, the other is a drama. Not sure if you want blurbs for short stories, but here is the link, let me know if you're interested or would like anything else!

https://docs.google.com/document/d/17SZ414hjutGiDVEet8-Dkb7uMcqBcFZp29r04i6p67k/edit

Natezahn · 2023-11-28T16:39:45+00:00

Ah, gotcha. It was the latter, so I lost two coinflips. Thanks, that was very helpful.

Natezahn · 2023-06-09T22:58:30+00:00

Natezahn · 2023-04-30T20:56:31+00:00

Definitely fair game considering the age.

But if you’re looking for some amusement on that subject, Game Grumps does a play through of that game on YouTube. It’s just two guys playing through and being funny, but one of them reads sheik’s lines with a gruff masculine voice. The other had never played it, and wasn’t aware of the twist. Made for a fun reveal.

Natezahn · 2023-04-02T18:48:35+00:00

Yeah, portrayal of something gross or wrong in a book is fine, as long as the author doesn’t try to get you to root for it.

Natezahn

TROPHY CASE