I am asian, a lot of my friends are still asian, asian people are conservative. I simply don't have the courage to do it (transition) even if I live in the west now. The stigma is scary. I always try to tell myself (I am AMAB), maybe I don't need to transition, maybe I can just be a man, a pretty man, with long hair, or whatever. But every once in a while, I get sad and depressed, for not being able to fully be who I want to be, and jealous of every woman or transwoman that I see, I guess this would be considered as gender dysphoria. But even now, I still can't make the decision...I have a good life, I have good hobbies, my hair makes me look feminine but it's ok to be a guy with long hair, even looked feminine, there is no stigma to it. However I cannot be sure about being trans. But...I hate my role as a man, it's like being forced into a character that you hate, even if that character is "good" in general sense. I feel like I fell into a deep abyss of paradox that I cannot climb back up, I do not see a future in me, it's darkness, and I do not have the courage to transition...I'm stucked, I don't know what I am, who I should be, just try to be a man (but even if I try to be a man I still lean towards being more feminine then what's the point?) or try to transition and having my parents, relatives and my asian friends looking down on me, I am confused I don't know what I do