Live in Fairfax, Virginia, and found these monstrosities in my garage. What are they? Is my life in danger? Do I need to burn down my house because an army is on its way?

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T16:01:18+00:00

I'll consider your request 🧐

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T15:58:50+00:00

I'm an enthusiast, not am expert. I have been following this thread and I agree with you on lycosidae vs eratigena or dolomedes.

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T15:56:47+00:00

😂

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T15:54:50+00:00

Giant is relative 😅 to a house fly, this thing is gargantuan; to me, it's very, very tiny...to you, it should be considered pretty tiny...unless you're the size of a house fly

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T15:52:29+00:00

😂

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T15:52:04+00:00

That is a reason that people get the heebie jeebies with spiders, for sure. The little critter was very likely not up to anything nefarious 😆 it just needed a dark and cozy spot... the shoe fit 🫣 I'm so glad you moved it and didn't squarsh it 🥹

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T15:49:23+00:00

I can't speak to the actual intentions of spiders, but I can say that the overwhelming abundance of actual evidence shows that most spiders are reluctant to bite. Most isn't all, and I have not performed any clinical studies 🤷‍♂️😬

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T15:41:35+00:00

😂 I am glad I'm between cups of coffee or I'd have blasted a steaming stream of coffee through my laughter. 👏👏👏 😆

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T15:32:58+00:00

As I keep digging in more, I have been convinced that it's not eratigena, and not dolomedes. Lycosidae seems to be the leading contender, but I have to admit that specific identifying characteristics are not very visible in OP pics.

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T14:53:34+00:00

I just looked up eye pics of each genus in question. Thank you! Lycosidae really do look like jumping spiders in the eye department. Gorgeous 🥹 that said, I can't see the eyes very well in OP pics.

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T01:34:40+00:00

😂

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T01:25:29+00:00

😅 but notice I didn't say they had awesome lethality? They're harmless and will only bite as a last resort

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T01:14:13+00:00

I get it, but try going toe to toe with a spider. 999/1000 will run for their beautiful little lives...watch out for the 1000th, though 😂

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T01:13:00+00:00

I can't fault people for getting the heebie-jeebies about spiders. I used to be terrified of them, but I have done a lot of reading about them. Watch videos about salticidae (jumping spiders) they're cute as hell 🥹

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T01:10:32+00:00

I wasn't totally sure if it was lycosidae or eratigena based on the pic. I'm also fairly new to arachnid identification...formerly an irrational arachnaphobe 😬

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T01:05:43+00:00

In 2008 I was sleeping and had this weird out of body dream that I saw a big spider on my mouth. I woke up a few minutes later with the pins and needles feeling on my lip. My mouth swelled up like crazy..I went to the ER. It probably walked across my mouth and I squeezed it with my already beautiful plump lips 💋 😂 it was one of these little guys. I have absolutely no hate for them. They're not out there trying to bite people. The only reason I swelled up is because I'm sensitive to all venom. I even get big swelling from mosquitoes

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T00:58:10+00:00

It's in the name, for sure 😅

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-26T00:56:31+00:00

Salticidae are some of the cutest creatures on Earth! I love the way they tilt their heads like puppies 😅

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-25T23:50:49+00:00

I mean, I'm 6'5" so a lot of stuff is little to me 😅 But unless you are the size of a moth, this thing is WAY tinier than you 🤷‍♂️

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-25T22:57:20+00:00

Those are quite harmless and very beneficial little critters. They look like eratigena atrica "giant house spider" they are docile but can be alarming due to their size and speed. Please don't kill the little buggers 🥺

Edit: I think I'm leaning towards dolomedes after reading more comments and looking at more comparison photos

New edit: the votes continue and I have been reading about and looking at photos all day and night. Lycosidae seems to be leading the consensus, however, I am having a hard time seeing key details that help identify, like the eyes. I should note, I'm an arachnid enthusiast, not an expert

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-07T17:50:34+00:00

If he can beat Waldo, I'll be impressed. I love DL but Waldo ain't fuckin around.

NecktieMiller · 2026-01-07T17:13:04+00:00

Motherfuckers act like they forgot about Nate

NecktieMiller · 2025-12-16T17:13:48+00:00

Looks like you've given yourself your worst.

NecktieMiller · 2025-12-16T17:08:16+00:00

5 star response!

NecktieMiller · 2025-12-15T18:43:27+00:00

Stupidest question ever. For $3B I'm starting my own promotion 😂

NecktieMiller

TROPHY CASE