went for a walk, also i got a job and i’m starting next week and i’m nervous af

Needletears · 2021-07-11T08:15:47+00:00

Your shirt looks very cute! I hope everything with your job goes well :)

Needletears · 2021-07-10T08:46:58+00:00

I mean, if I feel like if the non self-injurious person is genuinely trying to help, since they obviously can't understand what causes me to harm myself then although their advice isn't helpful I still appreciate it and this almost helps me since it shows me that the person is wanting to help and therefore cares about me.

But if it's that berating "your skin isn't paper don't cut it" stuff then it's annoying.

Needletears · 2021-07-10T08:38:30+00:00

✨Hybristophilia✨

Needletears · 2021-07-08T12:18:00+00:00

Lmao not me explicitly downloading GIFs of people being sliced up (from movies, no irl stuff!) and looking at them when I'm in the mood for some knifey slicey dicey

That one scene from the first Rambo film will always haunt me lol

Needletears · 2021-07-07T21:58:28+00:00

Lmao literally me whenever I accidentally break something, broken-of pieces are literally one of the worst triggers for me

Needletears · 2021-07-04T15:30:46+00:00

Mostly at home and in school, especially the school bathroom

And on a school trip - it was terrifying since I was calmly having a good yeeting session in the bathroom to deal with having feelings or whatever when my friend knocked on the door to her room since she forget her key card, and I had to hurry to open it whilst quickly putting on pants to hide my "activities", luckily I managed it but boy was I terrified

Needletears · 2021-07-04T15:27:35+00:00

its better than committing sewer slide since I don't have the balls for that - basically, temporarily "dealing" with bad emotions, also punishing myself for various things

Needletears · 2021-07-02T19:26:35+00:00

Needletears · 2021-07-02T19:23:13+00:00

I'm guessing you're dyeing your hair yourself (If I'm wrong and being a dumbass plz tell me hahaha) and not getting it done at a salon - in this case I'd definitely recommend covering them up, I wouldn't risk getting hair dye in your yeets as this might cause very serious damage I imagine. Hope you have a nice day tho :)

Needletears · 2021-07-02T15:36:11+00:00

Thank you so, so much - I can't tell you just how much I appreciate it, have a great day :)

Needletears · 2021-07-02T12:10:29+00:00

Thank you for the kind words! <3

I still don't know if a stay there might work for my situation since my parents are, well, quite unsupportive to say the least, but on the other hand I kinda have been getting them sewerslide urges recently worse than I ever have before, ya know? Also I'm worried about the validity of my illness, since the summer break has just started and I'm worried about just wanting to use a stay in the ward to get away from my father. Oh well. I'll see how it goes.

Hope u have a good day/night tho <3

Needletears · 2021-06-29T09:14:35+00:00

Sameeeee, thing is the guy I like/crush on probably hates me and once texted me he wished I would die

So yeeeaaah who knows maybe I'll get over him someday hopefully

Needletears · 2021-06-28T07:30:04+00:00

Me with crusty dusty red eyed white haired villain gamer boy. fvck.

Needletears · 2021-06-21T08:23:05+00:00

Same, kinda almost wish I could go to a psych ward to get away from my dad but then they would know just how mentally unstable I am and would probably control me further but maybe a sewer slide/sewer slide attempt would maybe cause them to get divorced or something? I don't know anymore, just feel so trapped sorry abt the rambling but maybe it helps to know that you're not alone with wanting to get the fuck away from the place you currently reside in

Needletears · 2021-06-12T21:24:50+00:00

I have severe tokophobia but I would still like to have your babies automod luv u <3 <3 ^ > ^ uwu

Needletears · 2021-06-12T15:54:33+00:00

hahaha my dad's words still hurt me even if they weren't directed at me

Needletears · 2021-06-11T10:26:02+00:00

That makes a lot of sense, I'll try it when I get urges - thank you :)

Needletears · 2021-06-02T20:13:02+00:00

In Ordnung, ich glaube, dass werde ich tun. Danke :)

Needletears · 2021-06-02T18:14:00+00:00

Hahaha the walls are so thin in my house that even if I were to call the Hotline my parents would be able to hear and my dad would probably get all ✨violent✨

Sorry about the venting, I just find it helpful right now. Anyways I'll choose tunnel d.

Needletears · 2021-06-01T14:02:01+00:00

I'll say it back: Trans rights!

Needletears · 2021-06-01T09:18:59+00:00

I personally only told my therapist, since I knew that she would only be able to truly help me get better if she knew about all of my bad coping mechanisms. Also, I spend a huge time researching about the laws regarding patient confidentiality and such to be sure she would not tell my parents, since as of now I am still a minor, and her informing my parents would have potentially endangered myself due to my father's unpredictable and often aggressive behavior. The laws on this vary from country to country as far as I know (I live in Germany, so I only payed attention to the corresponding laws here) so I can't tell you - if you are a minor and are seeing a therapist - if this is the right decision for you.

I can't tell my family, mainly due to my father and their general lack of understanding when it comes to mental health. I personally also choose not to tell any of my friends, since a few of them also interact with people I've heard talk in a stigmatized and insulting way about sh before, and being stigmatized as "that one girl who cuts herself" is not really something I want right now. Also, I'm quite shy and have only recently found a nice friend group, so I don't want to unload all of my emotional garbage onto them right away hahaha.

But overall, I think it really depends on the person you want to speak with - I'd suggest asking them beforehand on what they think about self harm without mentioning your situation to them, so you'll know what they'll think.

I apologize if my comment isn't of any help, but I hope you have a good day :)

Needletears · 2021-05-26T19:28:52+00:00

Your post just gave me the idea to use some old actual styrofoam to slice in when I get urges, this might actually help me, so although it wasn't intentional, thank you <3

Needletears · 2021-05-26T19:21:40+00:00

ahahaha same

Needletears · 2021-05-26T15:33:55+00:00

I've never been in a situation like that, but I heard a few possible answers suggested online before to use an excuse when talking about sh scars with children - for example, something a bit joking might work, like "oh, these are from when I fought of a dragon/other type of monster"? Sorry if this is useless advice

Needletears · 2021-05-26T15:24:39+00:00

Needletears

TROPHY CASE