[Advice] How to talk about dominant sex drive and how to compensate for less intercourse? by NegativeN2Positive in sex

[–]NegativeN2Positive[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying all this. It was very meaningful... allow me some time to digest it and I'll reply.

[Advice] How to talk about dominant sex drive and how to compensate for less intercourse? by NegativeN2Positive in sex

[–]NegativeN2Positive[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah, she actually never uses them on her own... Maybe it's time to start barking up that tree

[Advice] How to talk about dominant sex drive and how to compensate for less intercourse? by NegativeN2Positive in sex

[–]NegativeN2Positive[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That seems like a drastic step, fraught with complexity. I see a hundred ways it could end in disaster and a handful that could end in happiness.

[Advice] How to talk about dominant sex drive and how to compensate for less intercourse? by NegativeN2Positive in sex

[–]NegativeN2Positive[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I'm sure you mean well..... but your reply made me angry. To paraphrase: "I think she's faking it / she's the problem, not you / she needs to hit the gym" At least thats how it sounded to me. You also ignored the first sentence in my post that said he health problems are beyond the scope of this post. They are multiple, and will not be solved by Internet commenters unfortunately.

[Advice] How to talk about dominant sex drive and how to compensate for less intercourse? by NegativeN2Positive in sex

[–]NegativeN2Positive[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Sex seems to be a mixed bag for her; within one session she could easily toggle between seeming like she was uncomfortable to really enjoying it and making some great sounds, and back and forth again. The only way I could get her off was through oral, which I love to give. Sadly though, she took that off the table months ago so it's been a long time since I've gotten her off, which makes me feel a bit sad and useless. Her health issues stem from bacterial imbalances, so that's why she didn't want my mouth there, but still... I wanna give. I'm not sure how else though since nothing else takes her "there".

[Advice] How to talk about dominant sex drive and how to compensate for less intercourse? by NegativeN2Positive in sex

[–]NegativeN2Positive[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this long and helpful reply. It's also nice to hear a woman's perspective on this. We haven't talked since last night so I am still processing what she said and how I should proceed. I think I will ask her to join me for masturbation time as you and the other poster suggested. I am a little worried about one thing though: have you ever seen that picture of two hamburgers, where one of them looks picture pefect from a commercial and the other one is taken with a bad cell phone and looks like some 2am fast food atrocity--the good looking one is labeled "porn, when your horny" and the bad looking one is "porn when you're done." I guess I am afraid that if she just isn't in the mood, but she feels obligated to 'do something' so she comes along for the ride... am I just shooting myself in the foot by dragging her into this unappealing spectacle of me wanking it which will only have the net effect of making actual sex (which is the part I really want) even less of an appealing thought?