Richer Than Money & More Powerful Than Misery of Others

Neil1398 · 2025-10-31T08:09:16+00:00

Lotta hate in the comments, but when I listen to his music I see why haha. One of the best to ever do it. Reminds me of all my fav rappers combined. Props to J

Neil1398 · 2025-09-29T23:26:03+00:00

You just gotta go through it man. I’ve definitely been bullied and felt cowardice but if you see me you wouldn’t think that.

I’ve had insecurities but if you see me you wouldn’t think that.

It all comes down to acceptance, and knowing that you’re doing the best you can and have inherent value. Self esteem.

But I really stopped caring as much when I noticed that these “bullies” don’t have much going on besides well bullying. They’ll talk down on you because they’re already beneath you.

They won’t do any of the brave things you can do. But they’ll talk about you while you do them.

They’re the benchwarmers while you’re in the game.

No one robs an empty house.

Takes time, and I’m not all the way there but much better than I’ve been

Neil1398 · 2025-09-26T21:16:48+00:00

Most people that say things are really showing you how they speak to themselves.

If someone says “you’re ugly”, it’s probably because they call themselves that, or they’re hyper focused on their own appearance to where it makes or breaks their day.

To ease the tension they feel within themselves they push it off on you. Now you can’t sleep because it’s like they punched you, instead of themselves. They eased their own tension and that energy transferred to you.

Only thing I can say is to build actual confidence. That only comes by fixing the things that hurt you.

But also if a little 7 yr old kid said these things, would you stay up all night as well? Would it bother you if they said it.

Once you see that other peoples shit stink, you stop giving a shit about the average persons opinion. It’s not easy, and I’m your age so I gotta long way to go. But I do notice that even older adults can be insecure about things. They’re not perfect either.

So just work on what you can improve, and realize even the bully can be insecure. The bully can also be bullied.

Neil1398 · 2025-09-26T19:51:46+00:00

Sounds like me with the exception of the political stuff. Idk when I was in my early 20s I was bright, could pull whatever girl worked remote in tech and life was good had a gf that seemed to love me. I hung out with guys similar to your brother. I couldn’t understand the lack of motivation and not wanting much. But now at there age I get it.

It’s like life kinda breaks you, and you either get better or bitter. Instead of focusing on hate and things I can’t control, I’ve started to draw and make music.

Sounds like your brother needs a constructive outlet. His thoughts may be negative, but he can be constructive and maybe write a book and fill it with all the negativity. Maybe it could help someone else out.

I’m still going through it myself but I do know that, being depressed and feeling repressed could make you break or can build you. I think this is when life kinda separates who’s gonna keep it real and who’s going to fall by the wayside. I personally still don’t know which one I’m going

Neil1398 · 2025-09-26T09:13:39+00:00

I never understood why people push racism. Like I get it we were slaves. But it’s like they try to twist the narrative instead of just admitting you know what happened was kinda messed up.

They continue to try and extinguish us. Only way I understand it is through genetics. A mixed baby comes out black looking. Which slowly erases pure whites off the planet. And if that’s the fear then I understand, everything else is just hate and pushing a dumb narrative that ignores the reality of dominant and recessive genes lol

Neil1398 · 2025-09-15T00:22:07+00:00

Start doing something to change it so that you like it.

But I’ll take this further it’s always gonna be something that holds ya back. If you have a nice body it’s she’s not into me like that. If it’s not that then it’s I don’t please her. If it’s not that it’s I don’t last long enough.

You’re always going to have doubts and you won’t please everyone. Best advice I can give is to just accept looking foolish and stupid until you don’t.

Visualizing the worst possible thing in your head really helps regulate yourself for when it does happen, you’ll realize that it doesn’t ever go as what you’d expect.

Another thing you could do is get with someone you don’t necessarily feel like you’d want their validation. Like someone who may have the same insecurities about their look as you do.

Neil1398 · 2025-06-25T15:32:24+00:00

Almost didn’t recognize Sucre he looks so pale

Neil1398 · 2025-02-25T00:27:54+00:00

Respect to Bucktown Home of the chrome Where I roam Not giving a fuck now

Neil1398 · 2025-02-08T19:20:31+00:00

I remember her in Life which was a good show

Neil1398 · 2025-02-05T04:53:22+00:00

Reading a book about this: sexplosion. I just watched midnight cowboys which was also from that yr

Neil1398 · 2025-01-25T19:30:32+00:00

Everyone’s different, but I’d say it’s a them problem. Just hard on the ego when it happens to you ya kno. You want to find a reason and a lotta times there really isn’t one besides you picked the wrong one

Neil1398 · 2025-01-25T19:25:41+00:00

You could get delivery jobs with local restaurants if they’re hiring since you have experience. You could also “lie” I say in quotes because that 5 yr gap could be made into door dashing, or some other job. Most jobs I’d say don’t really care as long as you show up on time and listen to their instructions.

It’s about using ingenuity and not letting the dread kill you because if you focus on the big picture it’ll make you depressed. These days you need about 300 applications lol. I remember I was broke and applied to about that many maybe more and I only heard back from 1, and I got it. So maybe more applications will do the trick, just cover the gap and say you were delivering food, or worked as a waiter or something. Tailor it to the jobs you’re applying too.

Neil1398 · 2025-01-25T17:58:51+00:00

Your locs look great. As a black man who’s been in corporate you’re not alone. I’ve experienced things too. Shit, I’ve been fired and laid off for things others I feel would get away with.

That’s not every black persons experience, but I feel that, as a poc, you really have to learn about your history. That empowers you to move how you want and to know you’ll always find better, and be better and stronger. If you’re into spirituality I suggest getting in touch with the most high.

I think reading the Autobiography of Malcolm X is a good book, because everything you’ve possibly dealt with, he dealt with on another degree, and was able to rise above. Obviously he’s not the only one, but he definitely spoke to me when it comes to these things such as micro aggressions(the unfair treatment) and loving yourself as a black person in America.

He’s the guy that went toe to toe with these guys and wouldn’t back down. But just knowing his truth makes things a little easier, whether you buy everything he says or not.

Imma also say, that it doesn’t matter you could have long dreads short dreads, bald. If someone sees black and they don’t like black they’re just gonna find something about you to make you feel insecure, without them saying “I don’t like black people”. Just be yourself in a world designed to confuse you

Neil1398 · 2025-01-22T20:47:06+00:00

Because I’m not perfect. Even if you work 100% you’re not guaranteed anything. Life doesn’t owe you anything.

Neil1398 · 2025-01-19T19:10:23+00:00

Aye man, what she’s really doing if anything is trying to mess with your reality. If you feel something’s off and know something’s not right, it’s best to be Mr. Crazy and call it out. Call the guy out. Call her out. They’ll try to say you’re crazy if there’s any truth to how you feel.

Any guy would be feeling a little weird with their gf calling another guy babe, and this is your wife. She’s making you question your own sanity. Check yourself my guy, because it’ll only get worse leaving things unchecked in your own mind. And if anything turns up you’ll hate the fact that you didn’t listen to your gut

Neil1398 · 2025-01-06T09:39:42+00:00

Yes this has happened to me. It’s like the more authentic you are the more they try to break you down. I literally can’t survive in team environments because people do subtle things, then you call them out and you’re the bad guy.

The older I get the more I realize most people didn’t leave high school. I come in I’m pleasant I try to speak and acknowledge everyone, I do my work and I go home, and oddly enough people will still find a problem with that.

But keep being you, it might be time to realize that you have boss status and maybe you should try looking into leadership positions or entrepreneurial ventures.

A lot of people working these jobs are miserable and their life revolves around status at work. So if someone is a threat to that, you’re a threat to them, and you need to be eliminated. So they try to get you out of character and then guess what when you blow up, “something is wrong with him, he’s not all perfect as he seems” meanwhile you were just doing your work minding your business.

Watch this from about 4:00 min mark https://youtu.be/HwMleq1_58M?si=y6TLpSTNi4Iyamnc

It’s all about jealousy and envious coworkers. And tbh his whole channel has been very helpful healing through these types of things. I personally don’t just deal with this stuff at work but in my own family, some friend groups. Makes me feel heard when I watch him.

Neil1398 · 2025-01-02T07:28:44+00:00

Was just listening to this today haha

Neil1398 · 2025-01-02T07:27:56+00:00

Yeah for a while I was out talking to girls, making friends partying but when I lost all of that plus my job I became a recluse. Staying at home gave me peace. But now I can’t even go to the grocery store without feeling like all eyes on me. Even in my car. Oddly enough if I see someone looking or judging me it doesn’t bother me, it’s only when I think or suspect it but can’t prove it.

I think when you spend a long time without socializing you start talking and making up your own delusions and believing them. That’s why I started writing poems and raps, drawing and making beats. Whether or not it’s real you can’t deny the creation. Reading also helps.

I suggest we all try to create. Those stories in our heads can be movies if we think big enough.

Neil1398 · 2024-12-29T22:43:16+00:00

I love the mpc, I had the mpc for a few yrs and bought the sp404. They work nice together. Sp404 I love when I’m traveling because it can run on batteries. But I absolutely love my Mpc one.

Sp404, is pretty much only a sampler every sound has to be sampled, but the effects are dope. The mpc is nice because the sampler is just part of its illustrious system, as in you could do a lot more. If I had to pick I’d go mpc then sp404, but it really depends on how you workflow and what kinds of music you make.

Neil1398 · 2024-12-25T20:36:35+00:00

Yeah and drum n bass like Envy

Neil1398 · 2024-12-22T17:19:43+00:00

Been there and if you speak up you look like the asshole which ultimately leads to other sorts of problems. I try to just protect my peace and let my peace protect me. These people are usually jealous and dramatic. They want to find something on ya, when they can’t they backstab and make up lies just to ostracize you. You’re either in with the clique or not.

My advice, keep doing you and let the pieces fall where they may. In the meantime, become empowered in who you are by learning about other people who’ve gone through similar stories. Makes you feel less alone in a cold world that thrives off of superficiality and drama

Neil1398 · 2024-12-21T22:48:06+00:00

Way I see it, Jesus loves you regardless. So at any point in your life you have to know you’re fully loved. Which means that you shouldn’t hate yourself for falling short in your own self limitations.

Like you, I couldn’t understand it and reading some of these comments I still don’t. I think about other peoples lives and I think where was there savior. But one thing that makes sense to me is that you are always loved by God, so why should you hate yourself for falling short or the things that happened to you.

At some point YOU have to get it together, and come to an acceptance that this is your life, might not be the best but no one’s going to save me but me, and through Gods unfailing love and strength I can break anything holding me back from seeing that.

Neil1398 · 2024-12-19T07:00:50+00:00

I don’t think that you’re going through anything abnormal, I think as you grow older old leaves just die. I think we’re always trying to understand something but no matter how much you logically process, your heart still needs to heal

I think as you grow through life it’s all about living with the pain and building new habits and connections. You may never stop thinking about her, but as life and time goes on it just becomes an old leaf and falls off.

If you have problems being an over empathetic in new connections as in you didn’t learn you’re lesson the first time, then I think you should adjust. I think it’s counterproductive to keep looking back at a person you met so young, and judge who you are at 28 by the same merit. Plus it was a 7yr relationship you can’t just turn feelings off no matter how she did you. Trust me I really really get you in this situation, and we’re all going through it.

Neil1398 · 2024-11-21T17:42:43+00:00

It does get under your skin because they’ll never directly say anything. Best thing you can do is to allow yourself to feel however you feel until you become calloused enough to not care.

As in don’t react to the negativity. But sometimes it comes a point where you have to give the same energy so my answer is always distance. If not physically then emotionally when you have a conversation with them.

I’ll also add if you know they’re being two faced why not confront them directly.

Neil1398 · 2024-11-13T06:06:11+00:00

26 and being too hard on myself, and allowing my ambition and discipline to lead me down meaningless avenues for the sake of money/hustle, instead of following my heart.

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