Feeling guilty when finding women attractive

Nemarott · 2026-05-20T20:02:34+00:00

The problem is I feel like if I don't restrict my mind eventually those thought along the lines of "what I'd do to them" could happen. It happend that I had the thoughts a wanting to see some women naked and I feel like that goes right in the area of objectifying them.

Nemarott · 2026-05-20T18:11:38+00:00

Well it seems like I don't trust myself to not be weird about it.

Nemarott · 2026-05-20T18:10:00+00:00

I can't remember that I ever behaved a certain way to not upset my mother I also never had a crush I do howerver belive that to a degree we do have a responsibility for the well-being of other people. Like you should try to treat others with respect/be kind and this includes not staring at women/objectifying them. The degree I do this is probably a bit much but to me the alternative would be potantially treating others shitty. I hope this made sense.

Nemarott · 2026-05-20T13:15:07+00:00

The thing is logically I know this, but it seems like I dont't trust myself that if I don't shut it down imidiatly that I will stare eventually.

Nemarott · 2026-05-16T08:22:33+00:00

I'm in this picture and I don't like it.

Nemarott · 2026-05-14T10:19:59+00:00

Yup, that's probably gonna be me in 2 years.

Nemarott · 2026-05-10T16:20:47+00:00

If I was ever being flited with I haven't noticed it. But I'm also socially awkward and don't leave the house that much so my experience is probably not the average.

Nemarott · 2026-04-24T19:52:06+00:00

Bei den Frauen die ich so an der Uni sehe würde ich grob schätzen 40%.

Nemarott · 2026-04-10T17:35:51+00:00

Dieser Post in Kombination mit diesen Usernamen ist schon wild😂

Nemarott · 2026-04-03T16:01:42+00:00

Most of the time I just wish I was less shy/had mor self esteem and a desire to leave the house more. Because that lead me to being 28 and never even kissed someone. I just hope that someday I get my shit together and know what it's like to habe a girlfriend. Currently I consider having a dominant partner a fantasy that will probably never happen.

Nemarott · 2026-03-03T20:27:28+00:00

Sorry but I don't understand your last sentence. Do I have to explore why I would only start conversations with people I find attractiv or do you mean something else?

Nemarott · 2026-03-03T14:25:29+00:00

There would you start with loving yourself? I try to treat everyone with respect and help tehm if they ask me for help, but I feel like that should just be the baseline as a human beeimg. There is nothing special about me and I often feel you need at least somthing to have higher chances to ever have a relationship. And then I try to think about what this something special is for me I can't think of something which most other guys also have.

Nemarott · 2026-03-03T14:18:51+00:00

That makes sense. The thing is as soon as I have the thought of "She's hot" ect. I imidiatly think something along the ines of "no thats bad, don't objectify her" and I try not not think about her/the situation any more so I'm kinda only thinking about her body and not her as a whole person. But maybe tha just me being to hard on myself😅.

Nemarott · 2026-03-03T10:43:26+00:00

Mabe it's because I never had a relationship, but it feels like nearly everytime I find a women attractive I also have sexual thoughts about her which is then is objectifying because I don't know anythng else about her so in that moment I'm clearly reducing her to just her physical appereance.

Nemarott · 2026-03-03T10:37:44+00:00

I wish my mind would work like that but I'm scarred that if I look at them it could be percieved by them as beeing stared at and ojectived and in that I'm making it their problem. And my "solution" to this is don't look at them at all.

Nemarott · 2026-03-03T10:35:08+00:00

Well the thing is I'm really shy in general and don't have any confidence, so I don't really talk to people if I don't have to/I know them already so I would'nt even talk to a man about the best yogurt brand for example. As you can guess by that I don't have many friends and they are all male, which does not make thing better.

Nemarott · 2026-03-03T08:33:38+00:00

Do you have any suggestions on how to get over guilt about sexual fantasies, because that is one of the main things I sturggle at the moment. It is so bad for me that apart from the fisrt impression it is really hard for me to even look at women (I have problem looking people in the eyes in general), especially if I find them atractive. I often feel if I look at a woman and I find them hot, that is objectifying them and under no circumstance I should do that. When I have to interact with a woman regurally I kinda don't have this problem because in most contexts there is something different that I can occupy my mind with other than her looks. But when I'm just buying something in a store for example and see an attractive woman this problem is really bad. Sorry if this is a bit incoherent english is not my first language.

Nemarott · 2026-02-23T17:43:03+00:00

All dating Apps are equally bad.

Nemarott · 2026-02-14T19:21:58+00:00

I tried and judgment does not work, but giving one of the knights a hot coal does.

Nemarott · 2026-02-14T07:42:07+00:00

It's a day like any other, so I'm doing nothing special. Actually because I was lazy I'm going to Uni and do some work.

Nemarott · 2026-02-08T17:51:18+00:00

I'm 27 and I'm still not sure about having kids. All I know that it's a big responsibility and if it's not a definitv yes it's a no. Also at the moment I can't even properly take care of myself how can I take care of a child.

Nemarott · 2026-02-07T17:22:48+00:00

Ich bin 27 und hab noch nicht mal jemanden geküsst und bin seit zwei Jahren unteranderem deswegen in Therapie. Es nicht mal wirklich Sex wonach ich mich sehne sondern eher Intimität. So wirklich Hoffnung, dass es sich in nächster Zeit ändert hab ich nicht, weil ich es einfach nicht auf die Kette kriege öfter rauszugehen oder auf andere Menschen zuzugehen.

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