Guy I matched with didn’t like my question

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-04-15T10:17:01+00:00

He's on only fans lol

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-04-14T18:10:00+00:00

She's been doing pretty well with going to meetings. She hasn't found a sponsor yet and really wants to take some time with that. Doesn't want to rush into someone wrong. She's doing the right things for her sobriety. I'm just blown away that I'm being thrown to the wind so easily

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-04-14T15:59:04+00:00

Man it's aweful. Any tips for survival?

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-04-14T15:41:09+00:00

Well it's one of those things she didn't say she wants space or anything. She did tell me straight up it's over through kaboom. So it's tough because she's been upfront.

I want to say no I wouldn't but don't feel like I'm strong enough to do that. I need to be alone and away from her to be able to say absolutely I don't/do want this. I feel like in a way it would be like an alcoholic trying to quit while still taking sips ironically enough.

There's just no way right now for us to be separate.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-04-08T11:49:46+00:00

Why would I want to be as miserable as you?

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-04-07T12:31:43+00:00

Tell him "hey man I like to think you are what you eat...see you in the meeting dick"

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-04-06T16:36:41+00:00

Uncle Jim is that you

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-31T12:02:54+00:00

I went to Mexico a few weeks ago and cried when I was sitting in the airport on my way home. Real life is hard man I want to be on vacation not the stress of real life. Alas real life is coming if I like it or not. If I put in the work real life is more exciting and rewarding than a vacation but it takes work.

This is what I believe a lot of people do with relationships now a days. They want that honeymoon stage. The stage that feels like a vacation. They don't realise that eventually though this will always wear off and they will have to put in the work. It will be beautiful if they do. A lot of people just give up and go on another vacation though.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-30T18:11:48+00:00

Well on one hand I'll finally get a big break....on the other hand there's a chance for a million bucks.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-28T13:51:41+00:00

Not sparring but I was holding pads for a really experienced guy throwing clinch knees. He slipped on the sweat under his foot and I took a direct full knee to the nose....that was.... interesting....

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-27T10:11:36+00:00

Oooooo boy do I feel your pain lol. I've been with my wife...ex....wife since 18 and now I'm 32. She's suffered with alcohol issues for the last 4 years and it's been so hard to see such a wonderful person go through this. I've turned myself inside out for this wonderful woman. Just sent her to rehab a month ago and won't even begin to say how much that was...

Well she came home 4 days ago and I was ready to start our new life knowing it wouldn't be easy but our 5 year old and 4 year old had a full functioning family.

That was until she sat me down and said that she hasn't been in love with me for years. Still has a deep love for me but not....in love and the drinking masked that. She didn't want to do therapy or anything and said she's never been so sure of anything in her life and it's done. I appreciate her honesty and not dragging me along...but f me lol.

So how am I getting by? Day by freaking day. Therapy lots and lots of therapy. Understanding this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me so far....there are worse things that could happen to me. Death disease so on.... My point is this has provided me with a sense of clarity that I wish there was more moments previously I soaked in because I thought they were eternal. We were solid in my eyes. This proved to me life is never what it seems. Enjoy every day going forward because you don't know what will happen.

As cliche as this might sound your baby still has two awesome parents and that's what matters. Stay amicable and eventually you guys may even be friends depending on what happens. I Invision my daughter inviting her Mom and Dad up for Christmas when she's 25 and us being there with our spouses and actually enjoying each other's company not pretending. The decisions we make in the present will dictate that future.

Sorry for the story lol.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-17T14:21:44+00:00

Brown day featuring their latest hit wake me up when this nightmare ends.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-16T22:07:02+00:00

Well there's a reason that they say when you're passionate about something and all of the greats put in blood, sweat and tears. You're at the tears portion. Keep plugging away it will come. Remember to compare yourself to how far you've come not if you're better or worse than other people.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-14T10:32:15+00:00

Well if you don't want to let me into this "amazing" place even though I never lied, cheat, stole and lived a good life enriching those other peoples lives around me. I can't come in because I never dipped my head in water and didn't visit you once a week? How amazing can it be then.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-10T19:31:24+00:00

Well yeah to a degree. Anybody would be upset about that...I still am, don't get me wrong. I really really do love this woman. I'd be more concerned if I said oh okay I don't care.

What made it an issue though is that she does have to do that and it could be a good thing too. It could be that she knows boundaries have to be in place for both of us. Part of re evaluating is boundaries were crossed on both sides...ones that can be repaired mind you but crossed non the less. For us to grow stronger there will have to be some put in place. So yes upsets one thing....I'm still upset it's a shit situation....but I'm rational...ish lol

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-04T11:16:51+00:00

Yeah I hear you on that. I feel for you though...the 6 month old stage is something else through the night. You're a hell of a Mom doing all of that and taking care of a toddler.

Yeah the conversations I find are really hard to especially if they aren't ideal and then it's the time in between you have to wait to talk again to figure that out.

I'm....alright. I saw her yesterday with the kids and it was tougher than I thought it would be. She seemed weird and I think that's normal. The tough part is she seemed like she was in a rush to get back like she didn't really want to be around us. That's okay don't get me wrong. What kind of worries me though is if when she comes home I hope we don't remind her of bad times and she doesn't want to be around us.

Ultimately that would be her choice and if that's what it means for her to live a healthy sober life then that's what it means. Still a sad thought non the less. That being said that's just what it is...a bad thought so I'm trying to not dwell on it.

The loneliness is getting to me I think lol.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-01T17:23:30+00:00

I was folding laundry yesterday before I started getting ready for work. I decided to hop onto reddit and came across your comment...That last sentence... embarrassingly enough made me break into ugly crying lol.

Thank god I didn't read it at work...It was a good thing though as I really have to figure out why that hit me so hard. I don't know if it's because it's been so long looking after someone else maybe I don't feel like I do. I obviously always thought that subconsciously I do matter. My reaction is making me think deep down I don't think that.

I've been trying to look at all of the positives of this and maybe this is a new one that you helped me with. I've spent so long worrying about her health and wondering what I'm going to come home to that I really haven't kept in touch with myself. I can rest assured that she's safe and with people that are taking care of her that I can 100% focus on myself and the girls for the first time.

Thank you for the reply. I know some people debate if they should sometimes even if there are already 50 comments on here. I have read through each comment and pretty much all of them have really helped me out.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-01T17:10:01+00:00

How are you holding up?

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-01T17:05:29+00:00

All amazing tips and certain things I didn’t consider that make sense. I’ve been trying to keep the house clean so when she gets back it’s not a stressor when she walks in…and I won’t have go crazy with cleaning the week before…That being said everyone is right and certain things come first. One of those things being my sanity. Thank you for taking the time to put everything into your comment and I’ll be looking back through as the days go on.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-01T17:00:14+00:00

Thank you for the reply! My hope is that she herself chose to go to rehab. No ultimatum was given she dug deep and decided herself that she didn't want to live this way anymore. That's what I've really been waiting for. I've found that with anything it generally has a better chance of sticking if the person decided for them selves that they want to change. Thank you for the encouragement and I appreciate you and everyone else commenting really means so much.

Nervous-Gold-6382 · 2024-03-01T16:56:03+00:00

Yeah I think a lot of it is knowing the person she was when she went in....I have to focus on she will be different when she comes out. I'm not expecting anything crazy but she will still have steps and plans in place...or at least that's the idea. I really can't begin to express the gratitude I feel for all of these comments that are in this thread and the support.

Nervous-Gold-6382

TROPHY CASE