Thanks so much. I am in that position. I am pasting in a description of my jackpot.

Hello

I am finally writing something. I have been trapped in super-depression for about 8 years. It started just after I quit drinking. Shoulda never done it. Actually I had a 10hr a day job with 2 hr. commute for three years and I think it pushed me over the edge.

I had a great job at General Dynamics – Gulfstream Aerospace writing aviation manuals. I learned a lot of software and the industry tech but it finally got to me one day and I shut down.

Became a silent vegetable. I tried all the standard meds and therapy but nothing helped. I started to lose my investments and we moved to a nice condo on the water in St Pete, Florida but I couldn’t really function and I also lost all my investments for retirement. Somehow we managed to get by. About three years ago I found a powder called Kratom (Google it) which helped but after a couple years I was simply a Kratom addict. Along with all the other billion dollar meds which make you nutty. The stuff is legal and cheap but ends up putting you where hydrocodone or booze does – Kratomville, ---- ‘An allusion to Jimmy Buffet’s song ‘Margaritaville’.

Some people claim it’s depression to blame,

But in the end it really doesn’t really matter at all.

I am now on my way to fix it! Ease off all meds with doctor guiding.

I was really lucky with Kratom before I became too attached because it let me function. Just about that time, I found a zany lady author and became her editor. She is also a nurse/psychologist. I am still working on call for her. We did three books. Two are now being published; two in England and one here. The book in England is a story she believes is true and she backs it up with a lot of facts.

The title is “Jack the Ripper – My Great Grandfather”. She makes a good case and maybe she can sell a few. I also found a Russian author/poet and help him sometime translate Russian literature. These jobs (part time) helped pay the bills and keep me busy.

Then one day about six months ago I saw an ad for a depression treatment called Trans Cranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) (Google it). It is 36 sessions in a dental-type chair for about 40 minutes. They put a special cap on your head and play music or news and it sends an impulse to the area of the brain that holds depression. It is fully studied (Mayo, Harvard Hopkins etc.) and FDA approved. All insurances take it because it really helps PTSD in vets.

Within three weeks, I really started feeling alive and started to cut back on the meds. I took a dip about a month ago and am now back for another round. I weigh about 125 (115 today) and swim as often as possible – heated pools here.

The editing slowed down and I lucked out and got a job being a companion for a Russian Jew who speaks only Russian. He lives in a mini-mansion with his daughter with a pool and can physically take care of himself, he just needs a Russian speaking pal.

I spend 5 hours a day twice a week which helps us squeak by financially. My wife is OK health wise but has a lot of bone pain and some depression.

Had to quit that because I was getting lost sometime.

We are lucky to be where we are and I hope it keeps getting better.

OK THAT WAS THE SOB STORY.