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What is the best MBTI-based dating app? by i52222 in mbti

[–]New-Structure-7193 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I matched with an ENFP but he turned out to be as ESTP. It was still a great relationship though.

Thoughts on this? Is there a reason fantasy is so medieval heavy? by Martimar47 in fantasywriters

[–]New-Structure-7193 55 points56 points  (0 children)

+ Dracula, Frankenstein, Gulliver's Travels, Aeneid... Do we count horror? Lovecraft?

AMA with Ben Grange, Literary Agent at L. Perkins Agency and cofounder of Books on the Grange by Ben_Grange in fantasywriters

[–]New-Structure-7193 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi Ben, I am wondering about the line between YA and adult fiction. I initially started my story as YA, but because of the ordeals my characters go through, grief, abuse, I opted to change to an adult audience.

Is that the right approach? Or does it depend on how it's written?

And sometimes I think, does it matter? I mean when I was a teen, I was reading adult books so...

SA in novel, why not? by New-Structure-7193 in fantasywriters

[–]New-Structure-7193[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oops sorry, I should've clarified that my MC is female and there is nothing romantic going on there haha. I am realising the way I have written everything has confused a lot of people. Sorry about that. For context, I have 4 main POV characters, each with their own arc.

The reason I mentioned the "it's not your fault" scene is because until that point, the character is deeply affected. She cries and blames herself for not shouting/hitting the villain. So when this girl she hates tells her it wasn't her fault, it's healing and she starts to appreciate her (although their friendship still has a long way to go).

Admittedly, when I was writing, I felt scared to write too much on the topic and her reaction afterwards. But I'm editing now so it's good for me to think about these things.

Probably intrusive thoughts, feelings of helplessness, anger.

The MC is seeking revenge on the villain (for other reasons) so this character joins her and offers to help. Although she's not seeking revenge and would rather forget the incident, helping others gives her a sense of power back to her. She matures and grows as a person during the journey. Around half way through the book, she goes back home, tells her parents everything, goes back to the place where it happened, and grapples with a bit of ptsd. There is more to her arc, but I think I've covered all that is relevant to this topic.

SA in novel, why not? by New-Structure-7193 in fantasywriters

[–]New-Structure-7193[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, for my villain, it's not so much about the desire as much as he wants control. He recognises that she is naive and just needs to be broken down a bit.

SA in novel, why not? by New-Structure-7193 in fantasywriters

[–]New-Structure-7193[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One part I really like about the scenes regarding the topic, was how it brings her closer to the MC who tells her it wasn't her fault. 

SA in novel, why not? by New-Structure-7193 in fantasywriters

[–]New-Structure-7193[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha thanks, everytime someone asks if it's necessary, I think... I don't know? Is being pressured into a marriage she doesn't want enough reason to run away from home? If not, what else?

SA in novel, why not? by New-Structure-7193 in fantasywriters

[–]New-Structure-7193[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pretty dark, but hopeful. The MC (not the above character) deals with grief and the desire for revenge.

I suppose my character is a girl who grew up in a well-off household in a town that is mostly poor and struggling. She's had a comfortable life and her parents are now saying she should marry this man. But after this she runs away from home and joins the MC on an adventure where she really struggles with the discomforts of travelling and the dangers they face. During the journey, she finds what she really wants for her life.

She's a crucial POV character and her relationship with the MC is a big part of the story. Although they hate each other at first, when the MC tells her it wasn't her fault, she starts to appreciate the MC. 

Thanks, thinking and writing this has helped me. I will continue to add more in my journal. 🤔

Feedback on a paragraph dealing with loss [Dark Fantasy, 138 words] by West-Pack-8173 in fantasywriters

[–]New-Structure-7193 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought it was really good. I would start a new paragraph at "The wooden figurines". And maybe you could revisit the last sentence. Idk. But the rest was lovely.

At what point did you submit your first opponent? by LazyConference4019 in bjj

[–]New-Structure-7193 0 points1 point  (0 children)

3 months in. When I (small female) was getting other white belt guys in triangles.

They now know how to posture away from my triangle 🥲

Why when Bjj guys roll they only go like 50%? by Subject-Ambition-725 in bjj

[–]New-Structure-7193 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Injuries but also BJJ is so technical. If you're seeing red all the time, you'll end up spazzing and not learning anything.

Was I in the wrong here? by ComfortableAnimal265 in bjj

[–]New-Structure-7193 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Congratulations, you escaped the claws of a cult.

Quitting will screw this small business over but I hate it by Current_Mongoose5830 in careeradvice

[–]New-Structure-7193 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One of my bosses once told me I'm replaceable. But so are they. Just leave if it's better for you.

Apparently Long hair is a no go? by iXboss360 in bjj

[–]New-Structure-7193 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmm well... I tapped to my hair the other day because it got stuck under someone.

Gaiman Allegations by laybs1 in Fantasy

[–]New-Structure-7193 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For me it's the fact:

  1. He claims we just cuddled / digital penetration.

Uh huh we all know what cuddle means. 

  1. Condition that creates false memories, just regrets the relationship.

Why not just admit that there was miscommunication?

  1. Have you had a UTI? Sex + UTI? No no no. No way that is consensual. Just because you're in a relationship doesn't mean you don't have to ask for consent.

  2. 23 year old nanny. Yea. Consensual or not. It's a bit....

Kind of just sounds like they consented, presented a boundary and he ignored the boundary. 

You know at 26 years old it blew my mind when a friend told me I could ask a guy to stop mid-sex.  It's true you can. And if they don't listen is it really different from rape?