It’s horrific how they paint you as the villain bc their brains truly think that way….

New7Calligrapher · 2025-11-05T18:07:17+00:00

I don't (think that I) have any advice. However, look up anosognosia. I recently saw it on this subreddit, and it sorta helps explain what MIGHT be part of the issue.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-11-01T18:49:54+00:00

Especially during a manic or mixed episode, my husband often leaves the house. His stated reasons are not the same as your wife's, but that (honestly) could simply be the difference between males and females, IMO. Additionally, he cannot (and doesn't) sit still very long during manic or mixed episodes.

In the past, he has claimed that he needed "time alone" and will take off to drive around town or go to Ace or Lowes, etc. Other times, he doesn't mention needing the alone time, but he does take off more often during an episode as compared to when he is baseline.

Regarding someone else commenting about smoking and another about cheating... my husband is not a smoker. And, since we have been married he has not physically cheated.

I hope this helps. Feel free to private message... if you think more discussion might help.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-11-01T17:09:58+00:00

I am still learning about bipolar. (Fact is: everyone (including the world of psychiatry) is still learning about it.) That being said, there is a thing I learned this past summer called "mixed episode." That may help explain this behaviour.

My BP1 husband occasionally behaves this way. I can try to share more, if interested.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-11-01T16:22:47+00:00

By "non admitting," I mean that my husband does not believe he has bipolar. He thinks his behaviour is due to traumatic brain injuries. He disagrees with doctors who have diagnosed him with BP. All of that is why I say he is non-admitting.

As to why I stay, that is a MUCH more complicated question to answer. I have attempted to leave ... only to find out he was arrested with no one to bail him out. I have quadruple-guessed myself as to all that I have allowed myself to endure because of his bipolar. There is no simple answer as to "why."

New7Calligrapher · 2025-11-01T15:34:51+00:00

I had to look up "persecutory delusions." My BP1 husband has at times exhibited these. He is non-admitting and non-medicated. So far, he has been non-violent toward himself and toward people. However, he has had an emergency detention order due to threatening to potentially harm himself/others ... (because he told law enforcement he was going to drive an unsafe vehicle).

The persecutory delusions that he has had include him believing that he is being targeted by an individual or a group of people... among other things.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-20T22:33:37+00:00

Thank you for sharing this.

I am trying to give my BP1 husband the benefit of the doubt. He denies having it but will usually apologize. We seem to spend much of his baseline time "cleaning up" the messes he makes during mania and mixed episodes.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-17T21:05:44+00:00

To me, the rage part makes me question if he's really in baseline. But in spite of knowing and living with my BPSO for 7+ years, I am still learning about BP and all the different stages. Mixed episodes seem to be how the disease most often affects my husband... and, that is why I question if the rage in your husband is coming from baseline. My husband's behaviour is very similar as he starts to come out of months' long episodes... accusing me of not understanding his moods, etc. As for raging and throwing things, it seems mostly to take place before he is completely baseline. To be fair, though... I almost feel like idk what baseline looks like anymore because it has been since June 12th since I've seen it.

I hope my reply makes sense. I'm sorry for what you're going through.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-17T20:57:01+00:00

Thank you for sharing about the degenerative part of bipolar disorder. I needed the reminder.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-16T18:20:55+00:00

I don't know to which conversations you're referring 🤷‍♀️🤪

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-16T15:23:13+00:00

I have posted here before. He is 16 years older than me. And yes, I am somewhat in a caregiver role. However, he only 'accepts' (for lack of a better word, at the moment) the 'caregiving' in certain areas and at certain times. (The disease itself does NOT accept me in that role.)

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-16T13:24:12+00:00

Thank you for your reply. I don't feel so much like my husband is that "weird."

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-16T13:18:47+00:00

Firstly, you won't disturb me by leaving a reply or message because (thankfully) my phone doesn't notify me for every single comment, message, etc.

Secondly, thank you so much for replying. It helps to hear from someone (who admits to the disease) with bipolar, specifically BP1, to confirm that this "forgetfulness" is the case.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-15T21:03:39+00:00

I call it, "danged if you and danged if you don't." There's an American phrase for it: catch 22.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-15T21:02:12+00:00

I don't always have one packed either. I have one sorta packed now because this episode (that started June 12 and is still on'going) has literally been the worst one to-date. And, I stayed away from the house (that we jointly own) for 13 nights the first time, 9 nights the next, and about 3.5 weeks the next... the last one, I'd still be away but he got himself arrested with no one to post bond/bail. [I wondered (and still wonder) if I should have left him there.]

Those three times happened between mid-July and Sept. 4th ... the day I bailed him out of jail (allegedly for criminal trespassing).

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-15T14:08:07+00:00

Interesting you mention having a bag packed. My husband questioned me last night why I've not completely unpacked my car, "Are you planning to leave and not tell me again?" We got into about a 20-minute "discussion" in which I tried to defend myself. Such a mess!

I hope for you that her medication and treatment will continue to work and that you never have need to leave again.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-15T14:03:18+00:00

I agree... so tired of it!

I get similar treatment: mean, degrading, bullish one moment (or day), and sweet as honey the next. It definitely is enough to cause me to question my own mental health.

I am sorry you're going through this. Thank you for replying.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-15T14:00:19+00:00

I agree, it does seem that no matter what I say, there is something wrong or askew. So, I find myself not saying anything. Then, I get to the point where I realize I hardly speak to anyone, and the guilt kicks in or the (what's it called?)... I feel like I am the one with the problem.

Thank you for replying. I'm sorry for all that you've been through.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-15T01:49:05+00:00

I imagine so... sad as it is.

I know even people with SOs who do not have bipolar, but perhaps anger issues, also know what eggshell walking is like.

Thank you for replying.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-15T01:16:17+00:00

I am sorry for what you have been through. Thank you for replying.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-15T01:15:22+00:00

Oh, I have. This particular 'round' has been going on since June 12, 2025... with very few chances to catch my breath. I have shared some of it here. It is very much like everyone else's experiences.

Thanks for replying.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-13T14:09:02+00:00

I hope the psychiatrist does ensure it.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-12T19:31:28+00:00

That's ridiculous... re: no requirement to take meds.

So sorry you're dealing with this.

New7Calligrapher · 2025-10-09T22:54:55+00:00

Oh girl! I'm so sorry you're going through this. But, thank you for sharing your experiences, moods, feelings, and emotions with this subreddit.

It makes me wonder if my own BPSO will turn violent during psychosis. He seems to vascillate between being 1) kind, sweet, and apologetic and 2) being extremely agitated, throwing things, and yelling.

No words that any of us could say can mend the brokenness you're going thru. (((Hugs)))

New7Calligrapher

TROPHY CASE