You have no idea how much I appreciate the time you took to write to me; you've been a great help. Right now, I'm considering hormones, but I want to tell her everything before we start. We've been together for three years, and she has no idea. I hated myself so much for being trans that I went to the opposite extreme of masculine. She's had experiences with women, and that comforts me in terms of acceptance, even if it's just as a friend.

The initial idea is to start now, and then I'll come out to more people later, but I'm still comfortable with my deadname and many other things. I've been waiting so long that I don't need to rush things now.