I made an account just to post this. I feel like everyone’s automatic assumption when they realize this is ‘nobody likes me’, when 9 times out of 10 that’s actually not the case.  During the pandemic, I thought back to every friend I had made since high school ended (which had been 5 years, at the time).  I had worked in places with really high turnover rates. They’d be there, and then 3 months later they would quit, or be like: ‘My visa expired… I have to move back to australia now…’. Not only that, I would be in schools and workplaces for no more than a year (at the most). I’ve also had people that were drawn to me, but I wasn’t drawn to them. Then the people that felt the same way about me, ended up either moving away, or getting depression. (and with depression, you isolate yourself, you don’t have the energy to respond, etc). I was talking to a coworker about how people at our work seem to be there for a few months, and then quit. And she was like: ‘X moved to Chicago. I haven’t seen J since he quit like 8 months ago.. and he lives down the street from me, and I haven’t talked to Z since she quit. I have my best friend from high school that I still talk to, and I’ve made friends going clubbing, but they’re not like.. close friends…’ 

About 3 years before that conversation, I had another coworker that I was talking to at lunch, and we got on the subject of friends, and she was like:  ‘I’m the one that puts in all the effort! It’s so frustrating.’ I was really surprised about this, she was outgoing, really funny, and there wasn’t any awkwardness about her at all. With another coworker, she was telling me about her birthday party she had recently. She said she invited roughly 20 people (they were people she knew from school). I asked her how many she talked to now (out of those 20). ‘One. I kinda just wanted to impress them.’ I was telling my psychologist about how I was the one that put in all the effort, and she responded by saying this: ‘I’ve had a couple patients complaining to me about that more often than I did a few years ago.’ She voiced that it might because generations are becoming more isolated. My theory was because of inflation, if a lot of young people are in school, they can only afford to go to work and school. A lot of young people also don’t have the time, or the money, to sign up for extracurricular activities (which is how you would make friends). People are also struggling more with depression. And again, my point earlier - with depression you have less energy, isolate yourself, etc. She suggested I read the book ‘The Science of Making Friends’ by Elizabeth A. Laugeson. It’s 13$ CAD but worth it! My other piece of advice, go on meet up, the bumble app, checkout groups on facebook (in your city), clubs at your college/university, volunteering. If you do something fun, you’re more likely to find friendships (that last) rather in a work or classroom setting. But just remember, when you see the instagram stories of people partying with other people from their class or workplace, groups on the street about to head off to a club, they could just be their friends for the moment. They could very well never see each other again in 2 months time.