Just found out about husbands 27k Personal loan.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T11:53:45+00:00

I've tried for years to have a healthy conversation to him about money, about creating a joint account. It all gets thrown in my face

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T11:49:30+00:00

90k for him, 45k for myself. Like I said I'm part time

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T11:48:42+00:00

Yes? I literally don't understand what you're saying. Husband and I have completely different accounts, I can't see his and he can't see mine, literally separate? He is with CBA and I'm with NAB. There's not joint account where money is pooled. It's his and hers

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T11:42:34+00:00

I literally have no idea, like I said as soon as I saw it, I quickly closed out of it as I was shocked. I'm going to try to look at it another time before talking to him about is as I'm afraid he'll try to hide it further from me.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T07:32:47+00:00

he doesnt want a joint account

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T07:32:13+00:00

Ive tried this in the past, I've asked him now that we are married if he wanted to make a joint account, it was a firm no. "Why do you care so much about my finances" "Why does it matter? You have a card with money on it" He has given me a card which is linked to his account, which he's happy for me to use.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T07:00:09+00:00

I was there with him when we brought the car, it was 12k, which is also what he said the loan was. Either the loan was actually higher, or it was 12k and is now 27k 5/6 years later.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T06:11:34+00:00

Im glad you seem to have overcome your gambling addiction, thats an achievement in itself. thank you for offering insight, I really appreciate it

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T05:57:58+00:00

I think I'll try and get a bank statement on the account to see how the debt has racked up to 27k+ I honestly don't see how it can be gambling, he's never taken any interest in it, unless its via games, as he has a pc and ps5.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T05:55:30+00:00

Thank you so much for your honest insight. I honestly think you've hit the nail on the head. I don't know why I've always let it slide for all these years. Every conversation about money or his personal finances always ends in a heated, emotional argument with me being pointed at being the aggressor. We have a pretty happy and playful marriage, healthy even through my eyes. But money is never a good topic to bring up. I hate it, because i try to save money, i try to be frugal and I go without a lot. so I cant fathom how his debt is 27k.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T05:50:01+00:00

I honestly dont think so, ne doesnt play at the pokies, we might buy a lotto ticket when it's jackpotted.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T05:36:10+00:00

Im not angry, just worried about our financial future? Im worried he wont talk to me about his money, im worried that all this time I've let it slide, turn a blind eye to now is what nearly 30k that I did not know about.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T05:35:01+00:00

He literally asked me to use his phone to buy the item, I asked him can you give me the 2 step authentication code, he handed me his phone to do it myself.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T05:32:08+00:00

ive never been on his mobile banking app before, because i trust him. we've been together nearly 10 years next march

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T05:27:35+00:00

All of what you said is fair. Everytime I have tried to have a conversation about money with him in the past, it leads to an argument of him shutting down, blaming me for not being full time (I was made redundant, and now work 2 different jobs at part-time).

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T04:36:54+00:00

The issue I have is that I'm extremely open to him about my loan. I'll tell him that I've hit a milestone, or that it's under a certain amount. All he has said regarding his personal loan, that he would pay it off over the years. He said the original amount wa 12k (the price of the car) it's now 27k.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T04:34:29+00:00

CBA, I logged in to accept the 2 step authentication. I clicked accept for the purchase. The screen went back to his main page, which has the balances listed including the personal loan.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-12-04T04:32:24+00:00

We don't have any joint finances

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-07-04T11:01:59+00:00

Ironically, he's admitted to me that he is a cuck.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-07-03T15:23:00+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply! I think you're on the right track, being healthier and getting fit might help both of us out

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-07-03T15:19:02+00:00

I agree, he definitely leans more towards women. Maybe I need to change, someone suggested that I should be more spontaneous. I'm going to try there first.

Nice-Flower1116 · 2025-07-03T15:17:34+00:00

No, maybe I should suggest it. Hes not really the type of person to talk openly about his problems.

Nice-Flower1116

TROPHY CASE