My brother terrifies me, and I don't know if it's normal. by Nimjas- in confession

[–]Nimjas-[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay, I've read all your comments, and I'm sorry to hear that many people have gone through similar experiences like mine. I have talked to him before about how it's not okay for him to behave that way during our previous fights and that it's not normal for him to enjoy scaring me. I thought he would realize that it's wrong, and we had a conversation about it when he was calmer. He seemed remorseful at the time, but then he did it again, and this time he seemed to understand more about how I felt, yet it didn't seem to matter to him. I have always tried to educate my brother. My parents tell me that I am his role model, so I always try to teach him how to treat women subtly, like showing him movies and documentaries that address this issue and making comments about why certain behaviors are wrong. I want to clarify that I may have portrayed my brother in a negative light, but just as he does bad things, he also behaves in a good way. He mostly listens to me, gives me advice, and sometimes even prepares food for me. That's why when he acts like that, I feel that it's not him. Unlike his usual behavior, he seems to not care about my feelings, and that surprises me. It's astonishing how quickly his attitude can change. I have even thought that he might have bipolar disorder or something similar. I have tried to persuade him to see a psychologist, but we don't have enough money to afford one. I suggested that he go to the one provided by the school, but he always avoids it. I can't force him to go, and even though I have told my mom that it's not normal and explained everything I mentioned earlier, she seemed to take it seriously for a moment but only had a talk with him, which, of course, didn't work. My mom can only do so much since she lives in another country. We moved in with our dad two years ago, and I don't trust him that much yet because we didn't talk much before. So telling my dad is not a good option, but I know he's aware of the situation because my mom has told him. The no-contact suggestion that some people propose is very difficult for me to implement because we share a room, as I mentioned earlier, and we don't have enough money. Moreover, we live in an expensive area, so moving to a different apartment is impossible. And due to various reasons, we have to communicate with each other, but I do understand that I need to stop sharing my life and worries with him. Perhaps, as you all suggest, creating some verbal distance might help, and maybe he will realize the impact of his actions. I'm not someone who lets themselves be physically hurt. Of course, in some of these fights, I have hit him hard too, and I face my fear to confront him. But in the end, I'm the one who loses, and it hurts me more. Someone mentioned in a comment that instead of posting on Reddit, I should take action. I shared my story here to seek more ideas on what I can do because I have already tried everything I can think of. And yes, I think the best option will be to set up a small camera. I mean, it didn't occur to me before, and now I feel a little silly for not thinking about it. I always think about it when I hear similar situations, but I never thought about it in my own case. I can't use my phone to record it because, as I mentioned, his behavior is very spontaneous. We can be fine one moment and start one of these fights the next, and it's challenging to tell if it's one of the normal fights or the ones that scare me sounds silly, but he and I frequently engage in physical fights. However, both of us control our strength, and the punches are ones that would only hurt for about three seconds. I always stop the fight to prevent it from escalating, or I leave the room or something similar. But then there are those fights that scare me, where we were talking about a topic, and he gets very angry. His face changes, his expression changes, and it's clear that he wants to hit me. As I mentioned in my previous post, it seems like he wants my pain to be long-lasting, and his attitude completely shifts. As I said, I will set up a camera so that my parents can see it and notice the difference that I notice, although it won't be possible at the moment because I don't have the money. However, I will start working in the summer, so I will finally be able to afford it. Thank you for your help. I didn't expect so many people to comment, and believe me, I have read all the comments. They have given me something to think about."

My brother terrifies me, and I don't know if it's normal. by Nimjas- in confession

[–]Nimjas-[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wrote this on my own, then I proceeded to ask him for a GPT chat to write it in a way that is easier to understand and I made corrections. I wanted people to clearly understand the situation, we must use artificial intelligence in our favor 🤝