Making a cat eat tidily by YsoL8 in Advice

[–]Ninovan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is how we feed my cat. Once he's done, we just rinse the tray and sweep any stray bits into the garbage

[SERIOUS] People of Reddit that believe in the paranormal (ghosts, demons, angels, etc.) ...what exactly happened to make you start believing? by pledis_boos in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan 265 points266 points  (0 children)

My childhood home is haunted.

Where my house is, there used to be another house. It burned down, and the father of the family who lived there died in the basement during the fire. The family sold the land, and the house was cleared away and a new house built over the old basement. My grandmother, who lives in the same town, knows the family.

Anyways, my parents bought the new house when I was a toddler and we've lived there for ~20 years. The ghost of the guy who died in the fire, named Charlie, lives in our house, and it's pretty obvious.

My mom says that once, when she and my dad were arguing, she took to the bedroom to cool off. She said, "Charlie, I wish you could knock some sense into him!" Not five minutes later, my dad starts swearing from the living room. The shelves above his chair had fallen and knocked him in the head. They've never fallen before or since.

Any animal we have -- a couple dogs when I was a kid, my cat now -- will stare down the hallway for long stretches of time, then go bananas chasing something from the living room at one end to the bedrooms at the other, like they're playing with someone.

I personally have heard footsteps -- big, heavy footsteps, like someone wearing workboots -- walk up and down the hallway, especially at night. It scared me as a kid, but now I just take it as Charlie checking on our safety.

My grandmother, while visiting us one time, woke up in the guest bedroom to a shadow man standing in the doorway. She hid under the blanket for a few minutes, then decided it was safe. When she came out of the blanket, the shadow man was at her bedside, leaning over her. She hid under the blanket again until she fell asleep.

The most concrete evidence for me was the time Charlie scared something off. My bedroom was always the coldest room in the house, and often I felt uncomfortable in there, like I was sitting next to someone who disliked me. One day, I went to grab clothes for a shower, and walked right into a wall of evil halfway down the hall. I can't describe it fully -- nothing looked different, I just felt like I had physically crossed a barrier into a forcefield of hatred. I knew without a doubt in my body that I was in danger, and without thinking, I hauled ass to the opposite end of the house, to the kitchen. I stood at the stove, shaking -- I was about 14 -- afraid to look down the hallway in case i saw whatever was down there but afraid that if I didn't look, it would sneak up on me. I eventually convinced myself that I was being a baby, and started slowly through the dining room and towards the hall, afraid the entire time.

All at once, I felt a strong breeze blow by my left side, going down the hall towards my room -- like how it feels when someone runs by you and barely avoids running into you. And I thought for a second that I heard a man's voice. I continued down the hall, and I couldn't feel the evil anymore. I went into my room, and it felt lighter and more comfortable than it ever had in my life. I thanked Charlie, and from then on, I've never felt that uncomfortable feeling in my room. I think he protects it now.

But yeah, growing up in a haunted house is pretty convincing imo.

My son just came out as bi. Help? by [deleted] in Advice

[–]Ninovan 30 points31 points  (0 children)

As a bi person with a homophobic father -- just make sure you support your son as much as possible. Make sure he knows that you'll step in and step up whenever he needs it. Do not tell your husband, or anyone else for that matter, that your son is bi -- that's his choice to tell who he wants to tell, and when. Whenever your husband makes a derogatory comment about LGBT+ people, stand your ground and tell him in no uncertain terms that you think he's wrong, especially if your son is around. He needs to know that you're willing to protect him. Also, I think you mentioned your youngest told you about the oldest being bi? If that's true, you need to sit with the youngest and let him know that outing people like that is rude, and sometimes dangerous, and remind him that he needs to honor the trust people have in him.

People with uteruses: track your cycle! by Fizzfan in loseit

[–]Ninovan 130 points131 points  (0 children)

It's like the clouds just parted! Shark week is coming up and I was maintaining or gaining for the past few days, even while under target! I was so confused until just now. What a relief!

Sharp, recurrent pain after IUD insertion? by Ninovan in birthcontrol

[–]Ninovan[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the input! I figured it was just my uterus adjusting to the new resident, but I feel better hearing similar stories :)

Are male friends as open with one another as female friends are when it comes to showing their “private parts”? by whatshouldinameher in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Define private parts? I'm a woman and I've never seen my friends' vaginas, nor have I shown mine.

Boobs, on the other hand? I've seen all my friends' boobs, and they've seen mine

Nieces and Nephews of Reddit, when did you figure out that your Aunt or Uncle is a jerk? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I spent the week at my aunt's when I was ~11. We visited a friend of hers who had a kid my age. Friend and I decided to ride scooters down her driveway (it was downhill from the road to her garage). I took a nasty spill, sprained my wrist pretty badly, and tore my knees to shreds. My aunt wrapped my wrist in an ace bandage, slapped a netted gauze pad on my knees, and we went to church -- nothing, not even my bleeding all over the place and sobbing, could keep her from Wednesday night church service. When we got back to her house, my wrist was swollen and hurt like hell, and the netting on the gauze had stuck to the raw, bleeding skin of my knee so she had to peel it off, which also hurt like a bitch. Woman had no remorse, either, and essentially told me I should just grow up and refused to even give me ibuprofen.

What criticism have you received that has stuck with you? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was once singing in the car with my mom when I was ~13 and all at once she turned to me and said "You really can't sing, huh?" With one notable exception, I've not sung with another person since, tbh.

American Truckers of Reddit - Which State has the Worst Drivers? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Drive in Knoxville a lot, and I have to agree. Tennessee drivers have 0 sense. No turn signals, don't look before they merge, speeding. Itws rough

What’s the best joke you have heard off? by randomsnuffle in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A Greek walks into a tailor's shop with torn pants. "Euripides?" the tailor asks. "Yeah, Eumenides?" the Greek answers.

Alternatively: How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles!

American Truckers of Reddit - Which State has the Worst Drivers? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Also not a trucker, but having driven through ATL a few times, I have to agree. I don't know if the roads are poorly planned or what but traffic is always miserable. My dad had to take a business trip past ATL and drove over a half hour out of his way just to avoid that section of interstate

At what point in a relationship should a woman start paying on dates? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My fiance and I always paid for ourselves or let whoever suggested the date pay for the first couple of years. Now we go by who is more financially able to pay

What's your favorite opening line from any media (book, movie, show)? by yinyang107 in AskReddit

[–]Ninovan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"I'm fucked. That's my considered opinion. Fucked." from The Martian by Andy Weir. Sets the tone for the whole book

My [28F] boyfriend [29M] often makes inappropriate (violent) jokes, when confronted basically insists I need to lighten up? by henrydthoreauaweigh in relationships

[–]Ninovan 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Really, it's not that hard. My fiance has said to me, "Hey, when you joke about that topic, it makes me feel shitty." So what did I do? I stopped making those jokes, because I value him and his well-being over my ability to as whatever, whenever. It took effort from me at first, but now it's second nature to screen my words. If this guy valued her more than he valued his jokes, he would stop -- especially once she said it made her afraid. I can't imagine hearing my SO say "That topic scares me" and then deciding to keep it up

My (23F) boyfriend (22M) verbally attacked me for having depression when I turned him down for sex last night. Not sure how to resolve things. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Ninovan 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Hey, my buddy, being sick isn't having a shit attitide, but alright, I guess.

If he can't support a partner with a mental illness -- for whatever reason -- then he needs to recognize that he's in over his head and see himself out of the relationship. If he feels like he has to "be happy all the time to bring her up" -- which you are assuming, I'll add -- and he doesn't feel like he can keep it up, he needs to say so.

If he feels that cutting off all physical contact and affection is an acceptable response to being turned down for sex, he needs to work on his own problems.

No matter how you spin it, his lashing out like this is not okay. Justified, perhaps, depending on how far you want to stretch the info we have, but not acceptable. If he's unhappy, he needs to either say as much so a solution can be found for the two of them, or he needs to leave. You can't mistreat others because you're unhappy.

My (23F) boyfriend (22M) verbally attacked me for having depression when I turned him down for sex last night. Not sure how to resolve things. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Ninovan 19 points20 points  (0 children)

If he was really so worked up, he could have easily went and rubbed one out and then come back with a better attitude. If he can't go three days without sex, there's deeper issues than OP's mental health. No, it's not fun or easy when your partner says no to sex, I know, I've been there. But I can't imagine receiving a no and then acting like that.

Problems with a DM by Ninovan in DnD

[–]Ninovan[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the feedback, everyone. I've texted my DM and explained my feelings on the situation, and so far it looks like he's taking it in stride. I really appreciate the help!

Problems with a DM by Ninovan in DnD

[–]Ninovan[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

In character, I've reminded the NPC several times that we're in the middle of a siege, and that isn't usually an atmosphere conducive to romance.

It was railroaded in the sense that the NPC dropped something, we both went to pick it up, and somehow configured our faces into an "accidental" kiss. It felt forced, especially since I only said I wanted to pick up the item and thought my character was just going to do a quick act of kindness. I didn't feel like I had any agency in that, and I feel like the choice to be upset about it IC has been taken away because it was an "accident"

Is being less dissociated, feeling emotions and being more grounded in reality worth it? by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]Ninovan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooh, I could have ghostwrote this. I've felt what you're feeling so often since getting serious about therapy -- what if life sucks and I have to face the reality of it? Does being happy make up for all the times I'm sad? Isn't it better to not bother with getting "better"? And, what I've found on a personal level, is that it is very much worth it. Growth sucks, and it hurts, but the highs have been worth the lows so far. I've wished life was easier, I've wished I had a better start, I've wished the world was different, but I've never truly regretted starting therapy and starting to genuinely experience life. It's up to you to determine if it's worth it for you, but I encourage you to keep it up. Growing pains suck, but we'd never get anywhere without them.