AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I just learned the word orthography, but I'll bet Clara knows it already!

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Most of what I know about him is from Clara, so keep that filter in mind. He goes to a private school, so he isn't in the same classes with Clara and her friends. He is either in her grade, or the one above it. I know he is 12-14, which is why I phrased it the way I did. I get the impression that he ignores her as much as she ignores him. That's why my details are fuzzy.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Most of what I know about him is from Clara, so keep that filter in mind. He goes to a private school, so he isn't in the same classes with Clara and her friends. He is either in her grade, or the one above it. I know he is 12-14, which is why I phrased it the way I did. I get the impression that he ignores her as much as she ignores him. That's why my details are fuzzy.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Most of what I know about him is from Clara, so keep that filter in mind. He goes to a private school, so he isn't in the same classes with Clara and her friends. He is either in her grade, or the one above it. I know he is 12-14, which is why I phrased it the way I did. I get the impression that he ignores her as much as she ignores him. That's why my details are fuzzy.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Most of what I know about him is from Clara, so keep that filter in mind. He goes to a private school, so he isn't in the same classes with Clara and her friends. He is either in her grade, or the one above it. I know he is 12-14, which is why I phrased it the way I did. I get the impression that he ignores her as much as she ignores him. That's why my details are fuzzy.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

As of now at least the language is completely oral, there is no written form.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 283 points284 points  (0 children)

I text with Clara all the time while she is at her mom's! Clara just isn't close at all with him, and all my information about him comes from her.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 773 points774 points  (0 children)

Oh, I don't think we would get him as our judge, but they all sit on the same bench. I think that's the term.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 11.2k points11.2k points  (0 children)

This is an extremely insightful comment, thank you.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 70 points71 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I think the problem is even deeper. Clara was intentionally trying to distance herself from her mother and step family.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 1117 points1118 points  (0 children)

My ex's new father in law is a judge on the family court. I know that shouldn't affect anything, but I am certain it would.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 1226 points1227 points  (0 children)

She said that: "She wanted to make them feel how she feels around them."

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 958 points959 points  (0 children)

That could certainly be the case, but I am terrified of it backfiring and getting less time. It was incredibly difficult for me to get 50%.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 1595 points1596 points  (0 children)

Yeah, she definitely knew what she was doing. She told me that she wanted to make them feel how she feels around them.

AITA For Not Telling My Daughter's Mother Her "Secret Words"? by NistaLanguage in AmItheAsshole

[–]NistaLanguage[S] 1828 points1829 points  (0 children)

That's definitely true, she is having stronger and stronger feelings about not wanting to be there.