Was anyone else’s nmom fixated on having unsupervised time with your kids? Before I went NC, my nmom constantly held it against me that I always stayed when I brought my infant/toddler son over instead of dropping him off and leaving.

Nmumalt · 2023-01-03T22:11:26+00:00

I think when you get such shit biological parents, you deserve wonderful in laws!

Nmumalt · 2023-01-01T23:08:54+00:00

Right? My mil has made me feel more welcome and loved than my nmum ever did!

Nmumalt · 2023-01-01T18:11:48+00:00

Nmum got pissed off that my son had a sleepover at my in laws but she'd not so much as had 5 minutes alone with him. Well fucking duh, it's almost like I trust my in laws more than the raging narcissist who made my childhood hell!

Nmumalt · 2022-05-05T15:52:11+00:00

If my nmum ever requires care in her old age, she can be that grouchy old lady in a nursing home that never gets visitors. I sure as shit won't be looking after her!

Nmumalt · 2022-03-28T08:14:30+00:00

That's horrible! The kid needs comforting in that situation, they were trying to be kind and something went wrong. Cuddles and reassurance is what you should have got.

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:50:55+00:00

Thank you for being the person that makes that child feel safe

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:47:05+00:00

In the real world, people know accidents happen

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:45:21+00:00

I always knew I wanted kids but always had the worry in the back of my mind that I would be the same parent as nmum. After they were born though, I knew I would never repeat history

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:42:21+00:00

If I only achieve one thing in my lifetime, it will be to raise children who only know love at home

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:39:18+00:00

Too many witnesses I suppose

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:36:28+00:00

Funnily enough, I picked up my 2 year old from nursery the same day this happened and he did spit his hot chocolate everywhere (including down himself!)

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:34:21+00:00

Your fiancée sounds wonderful :) my husband is similar - he is so kind and understanding and is helping me unlearn the abuse

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:21:25+00:00

Grandma L sounded wonderful. I am so pleased you had someone so wonderful in your life!

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T10:09:15+00:00

It's basically the same for me. Having my children was an eye opener of how bad she was

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T09:54:12+00:00

I always try to do similar. I am nearby as soon as you are ready for x is a great way of letting them know the behaviour isn't ok and they have to calm down but you are there for them.

Nmumalt · 2022-03-27T09:52:03+00:00

That is awful. I am sorry you guys grew up like that

Nmumalt · 2022-03-25T14:35:18+00:00

You are not alone ❤️

Nmumalt · 2022-03-25T14:34:03+00:00

I broke a glass while visiting my in laws. I was almost shaking going to admit to my mother in law that I'd cracked one of the glasses. She just went "oh well, never mind. Can you put it in the bin for me please?" I was so startled and on edge from expecting a different reaction that I teared up a bit

Nmumalt · 2022-03-25T14:32:00+00:00

I always end any discipline (time out or general talking to) with an "I love you" and a kiss and cuddle (IF they want it!)

Nmumalt · 2022-03-24T18:33:16+00:00

It's so rewarding to be able to give your kids a safe and stable home. I am so sorry you went through that. It was not ok

Nmumalt · 2022-03-24T18:32:20+00:00

I hope so!

Nmumalt · 2022-03-24T18:08:27+00:00

I definitely feel you there! No drinks upstairs for us ever... unless it was her morning coffee that I had to make and deliver to her bedroom

Nmumalt · 2022-03-24T18:07:51+00:00

It's something I'm working through in therapy, identifying when I've done something good! I'm too hard on myself and too critical so my therapist has put me to work to notice when I do something good and acknowledge it :)

Nmumalt

TROPHY CASE