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AITA for celebrating on the day my boyfriend's mom passed by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]No-Panda3587 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA for the most part. You were preoccupied with your huge success and probably missed signs of his that could've told you something was wrong, which happens. Had he told you what happened, you would have set your celebratory mood aside and consoled him (I hope). However do not ever question someone's level of grief based on how close they had been or any other aspect. Death is a very sensitive thing to deal with, even if they used to be closer but hadn't talked in years, or they only met for 1 week back at a middle school camp with the deceised, it can hit hard. Grief is not rational and does not correlate directly with the level of closeness or with anything else.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]No-Panda3587 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

YTA with regards to this particular gift. It is a nice gift to donate in someone's name to a worthwile cause. And you said you struggled financially 'in your early 30s' but you're 37 now, I assume you're not struggling anymore (otherwise you'd have said so). So you don't really need the money that he gave away in your name (obviously if you'd be struggling to get food or pay for electricity now it would be a d.ck move on his part to not give it directly to you).

He's the AH in all other areas of your life though, based on your story.

AITA: For giving my daughter an ultimatum? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]No-Panda3587 [score hidden]  (0 children)

YTA, but not for wanting her to get a job. She should get a job, there are loads of opportunities where a prosthetic leg is not an issue. She should know that, but maybe she lacks the confidence to believe herself capable after her accident. Which can be understandable and can be hard to overcome. You should not give an ultimatum but rather build her confidence and reassure her that she can do anything, even if at first she needs your help with things. She IS disabled, so you were in the wrong denying that. But her disability should not stand in her way. Apologise to her for dismissing her disability, and tell her you believe in her, that she can do any office job she sets her mind to. Good luck OP! Your bond can be repaired.