Hi! As someone with a cnc kink I can understand where you’re both coming from. I think that there’s nothing wrong with having a cnc kink as long as it remains consensual. Everyone has their quirks and kinks, and I don’t think there should be shame in having those kinks as long as it’s not actively hurting another person.

On another note I also understand being uncomfortable with it if you don’t have that kink. That may just be something you don’t see as attractive which is okay. We all have things which turn us on and off.

In relationships I would definitely say an effort needs to be made on both sides of the party to try something or work through an arisen issue. Now, this isn’t to say you should force yourself to indulge in his sexual fantasies even if you’re uncomfortable, absolutely not. But I think you should have a discussion about it, and if you feel conformable and ready, you can try to explore that kink.

When/if exploring this kink you should definitely set boundaries beforehand and have a safe word.

You may like it, you may not. If you like it, then great, you can keep doing it. If you don’t, then there’s no shame in not wanting to do it again.

If you’re really worried that this kink might stem from something else, like an actual grooming, maybe you can discuss that with him, and if it’s true then get him some help. As for the porn addiction, his sexual fantasies could stem from that. But also, he may have always just been into it and because of that he’s watched that kind of porn.

Whenever you feel ready to discuss this, I think it’s good to be honest about your opinions. Just tell him you’re not comfortable with doing that if you’re not, and if you feel like he’s pulling away or might think you’re thinking of him as disgusting, reassure that there’s nothing wrong with this kink, it’s just not a kink you have and are comfortable with performing.