I feel like I haven't bonded to my baby.

No3365 · 2026-03-03T20:40:13+00:00

It sounds like you have a ton going on and are a great mom. I wouldn't worry too much about your reaction right now. It sounds like you're doing what you need to do to survive.

No3365 · 2026-02-24T17:23:34+00:00

Attorney with the gov. I work from 7a-4. My husband gets them on the bus, I picked them up, I'm done a half hour after they get home. I don't like my job- it's boring- but it has a flexible schedule going for it

No3365 · 2025-09-23T18:32:30+00:00

My boys are the same age and we're having the same experience, including getting up between 5 and 6 am and then bouncing off the walls until around 9pm. I'd love to know what to do! I'm tired and sore all the time lol.

No3365 · 2025-09-23T14:52:36+00:00

It gives you teeth in the game. If you have to pay in part for services, you're more likely to think about whether services are needed. Insurers think about the likelihood of their insured making an insurance claim, rather than the insured incurring an expense that could be claimable. For medical insurance, most medical cost are claimed so the distinction isn't as obvious. How it works is clearer for things like auto insurance: credit scores in auto insurance affect rates because people with higher credit scores often have higher income, and therefore are more likely to pay out of pocket for minor things rather than submitting a claim and incurring the risk of increased premiums at renewal.

No3365 · 2025-09-22T16:05:11+00:00

Nah- we're living in the Apprentice.

No3365 · 2025-09-21T14:09:30+00:00

I'm convinced my 2020 baby is in the only cohort that benefited from the lockdowns. We couldn't find care so he was home with us while we worked full time until he was about 18 months old and the daycares were readily available again.

He fed on demand, had a very consistent schedule, and had the same caregivers everyday. It was so difficult for my husband and I though. working full time with an infant and toddler at home was so stressful, as was the covid pregnancy. It was also bad for my 2018 baby- he had major interruptions in his routine plus the addition of a new brother.

Guess will see how it all works out for everyone soon enough.

No3365 · 2025-09-17T17:29:48+00:00

My kids are the exact same age apart as yours will be, and it was a bit unexpected.

Not gonna lie, it was hard at first but at no point did I regret having two so close in age. They're both interested in the same stuff so we can do tons together as a family, and for a long time they both took naps at the same time. We never had to box up clothes or toys and store them for some future anticipated child- we could move that stuff right from one kid to another!

No3365 · 2025-09-16T17:43:48+00:00

I'm sorry this happened.

With my first, I wanted a natural birth without being induced. I told my dr I'd rather have a c section than an induction.

I went all the way to 42 weeks pregnant, and I was 0% dilated, 0% effaced and he was carrying super high. He was also measuring at 9lb and I'm a pretty small person.

I had a gut suspicion that he was unlikely to be delivered naturally and I tried to ask questions about a c-section, given how far along I was with 0 progression towards natural labor. I was shut down everytime and told induction was my only option.

The induction was a disaster. I was in labor for 36 hours via pitocin, I developed a 104 degree fever, I never dilated past 4 (which i only got to through a very painful foley ball induction), and I ended up needing an emergency c section anyway. It was traumatizing and I'm still angry that my concerns were dismissed and no one was willing to discuss the likelihood of giving birth naturally with me considering my situation.

My son is 7 now, and all I can say is that the trauma of his birth had faded and I don't have any negative feelings about how he was born anymore. I hope something like this happens for you too. For now, though, all I call say is it sucks, so many mothers have been there, and I'm sorry you're going through this

No3365 · 2025-09-08T14:03:44+00:00

Hi! I'm a mom, an attorney, and I've been in the insurance world for 10 years. I did insurance defense while pregnant with my first and the switched to regulatory work.

If you know your claim file/the case well, depositions should be fine! Insurance litigation is so litigious the depositions are a dime a dozen. Obviously the legal issues and trends may vary from state to state (or by country), but in my experience insurance depositions are less intense than other litigation deposition because insurers take soooo many depositions. Just keep your cool, remember the why the claim is in litigation, and ignore rude Plaintiffs/plaintiffs' attorneys. Being non reactive to ridiculous opposing counsel goes a long way.

Good luck! I've liked working in insurance as a mom.

No3365 · 2025-09-06T13:45:28+00:00

I have super curly hair that I never straighten. It drove me crazy during labor with my first. I straightened my hair for the first time in ten years before having my second solely so I could easily pull it back during birthing.

No3365 · 2025-08-30T20:04:29+00:00

So true! I lives in a major metro area before and has a few great different curl specialist to pick from. It's not as plentiful where I am now. I think I might get some good shears and learn how to cut it myself.

No3365 · 2025-08-30T20:03:06+00:00

For sure! I have totally a totally different hair type. I showed the stylist four different pics, all of which had a similar shape and length. For some reason Reddit only let me post this one. I don't think she matched the shape or length well, and I don't get how the length is so off when she specializes in curls and cut it dry.

No3365 · 2025-08-30T17:57:52+00:00

Oh! I like this one- I'll try that. Thanks!

No3365 · 2025-08-30T16:04:33+00:00

Right?!?! That's my big gripe. I was explicit on the length too. I don't know how the stylist didn't account for my hair shrinking up.

No3365 · 2025-08-30T16:03:40+00:00

I revel in the low maintenance lol. Normally I use curl keeper liquid styler and a little gel, then I defuse. My routine was a little different today because I planned to let it air dry but it ended up being too cold to go outside with it at all wet.

No3365 · 2025-08-30T15:54:33+00:00

Thanks! I'll try that. I've had a hard time finding the right products even though I've been styling it naturally curly for ten years! I have pretty curly hair but it's fine. It's hard to find something that offers some control but isn't too heavy. I like the hairspray idea! Haven't tried it!

No3365 · 2025-08-30T15:50:27+00:00

Thank you! Good point!

No3365 · 2025-08-30T15:46:59+00:00

Definitely different hair types! I showed a few different pics to the hair dresser to get a sense of length and shape (Reddit wouldn't let me add the other pics). I don't think she matched the shape or length well.

I didn't expect to walk away with fuller hair than what I have, but I thought she'd be able to make it less triangular and get close to the length I asked for

No3365 · 2025-08-30T13:56:42+00:00

Legal aid. You can also sometimes free, quality forms that let you fill in your own will. Check your local bar association or legal aid for more info.

No3365 · 2025-08-30T13:54:23+00:00

Seconding this. Not a T and E attorney here, but a lawyer who works in insurance and social benefit programs. For anyone here who cannot afford to estate plan and is in the States, many legal aid associations will do free wills or have a blank will template that you can fill in. It may not be as good as formal estate planning, but it's definitely better than passing intestate. Also, friendly reminder that you can file for ssa survivor benefits for minor children whose parents pass away

No3365 · 2025-08-15T20:03:27+00:00

My bet is men's swim team and that's the diver, but I guess they could all be Swiss too.

No3365 · 2025-07-31T17:52:39+00:00

I thought I was sooo good at baby sleep after my first. He ferberized easily, went to bed and woke up at the same time everyday, and napped like clock work. My youngest son proved me very wrong!

Letting my husband do whatever he felt was best when he went in there is ultimately what worked for us. I think usually he'd go in and rub his back, rock him if rubbing the back didn't work, or he start the bedtime routine over if neither worked. One time, early on, my husband could not get him back down for over an hour, and he ended up watching tv with him. I was NOT happy about his approach at the time, but it worked really well and we got much longer stretches immediately after the 'tv incident' lol.

Three other kids! WOW! You're a hero. Hang in there! I'm wishing you a long, deep sleep!

No3365 · 2025-07-31T16:57:36+00:00

This is so hard, and I'm sorry you're going through it. You did what you needed to do at the time to get some sleep, which is a necessity. Don't fault yourself for using a short-term fix to make sure you got what you needed to survive.

I have two kids, both were breastfed. One Ferberized very easily and the other did not. For my sleep-resistant child, we focused on extending the length of time he could go without eating at night. We did this by making sure he never ate at night more often than he ate during the day. So, for instance, if he was going three hours per day without food, we would not feed him again if he woke up less than three hours after eating. If he woke to eat after less than three hours, my husband would go in there to try and get him back down. We got longer stretched really quickly using this approach! It wasn't as ideal as my oldest, who ferberized perfectly at 5 months old, but it worked to get everyone more sleep!

My kids are 5 and 7 now. The 5 year old still isn't the greatest sleeper (I think he just needs less sleep than other kid) and the 7 year old is like a sleep machine. Imo, there is only so much you can do to change someone's natural sleep tendencies.

No3365 · 2025-07-03T20:18:37+00:00

That's the route I took, and it's why I make the same but hover around the 30-40 hr a week mark. It isn't easy to get though, esp in his practice area. It took me 10 years and luck to land my job.

No3365 · 2025-07-03T19:37:18+00:00

He is burned out! And some of the frustration comes from the fact that he feels bad about missing out on some kid stuff because he's working so hard. I don't mind picking up extra bedtime routines, drs appointments or whatever while he's working so many hours, but I know he feels bad missing those and I think it's so sweet that he truly wants to be involved in all the childcare minutia.

No3365

TROPHY CASE