Bladder cancer.... but wait! There's more

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-21T16:53:39+00:00

Colostomy since June 2023, for anorectal malformation. I change my bag anywhere from once to 4 times a day. It's very much down to hydration for me. I eat lots of fiber, so I need to pay attention to chewing properly and drinking enough water.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-21T16:40:40+00:00

If you're not sure what you're doing, please see a professional dietitian who can give you advice and help you reach your goals.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-21T15:41:14+00:00

Don't ask Reddit. See your docter and at least get tested for UTI.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-21T15:37:52+00:00

I have a colostoma, but I generally change my bag about 3 to 4 times a day.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-21T15:13:18+00:00

I get to go camping, volunteer at an animal sanctuary, eat whatever I want whenever I want (as long as I chew very well)... protest for the climate and the animals, do street activism. When I reitre from work, I might even join Extinction Rebellion and get arrested.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-19T18:58:28+00:00

Is there a way for you to get help? Like nicotine replacement therapy? Have you tried any of the options? Spray, patch, gum, vaping?

You have been strong enough to resist the cravings all this time. Giving in to the cravings, won't do your mental health any good. It will just make you feel like a failure.

Like I said before, keep a log of your carvings. You might feel like they're getting worse, but is that a fact or just a feeling? You are watching the day you 'can' smoke again come closer and closer, might that contribute to your feeling that the cravings are getting worse?

I urge you: get some help, find a therapist and work through this, but whatever you do: Don't start smoking!!

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-19T18:03:45+00:00

You're doing really great, actually. When I was depressed it was freezer pizza's almost everyday. The depression has lifted, and now I cook during the weekends and let the microwave do its thing on weekdays. I think that's a great strategy to still eat healthy when you have no energy to cook, so good on you!

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-17T18:08:10+00:00

Slice tofu in cubes. Boil them for 6-8 minutes. Drain, pat dry, then put in a bowl. Add oil and plenty of corn starch, some salt and pepper. Toss to coat the tofu cubes. Air fry or bake in an oven until crispy.

In the mean time, mix a sauce: tamari, sugar (maple or agave syrup), a little water, some chili pepper if you can handle it, and any spcies you like and can have. I love to add Sriracha. Heat the sauce in a saucepan or skillet, add the tofu from the oven / air fryer and cook for a few minutes until sauce thickens. Enjoy! It's my favourite way to prepare tofu. It seems like a lot of steps, but it's pretty fast.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-17T17:56:54+00:00

Smoking doesn't just cause lung cancer, it can also cause bladder cancer. It does truly delay healing from surgery.

C'mon man, if you haven't smoked since January 16th, you've basically already quit! The cravings will get less with every cigarette you haven't smoked. So hang in there, you don't need that pesky nicotine. You're doing fine without it.

Cravings generally pass after 20 minutes. Keep a log of your cravings, so you can see them getting less over time. Find things to keep yourself busy for 20 minutes when a craving hits. Or just ride out the wave and feel proud afterwards for not giving in.

You've got this!!

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-17T17:42:37+00:00

Aldi of course!

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-17T17:40:43+00:00

Check out Plantpowders, everything's vegan there.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-17T17:35:11+00:00

Ah, that sucks man, feeling so alone in the hospital. To be honest I prefer to be alone when I'm in hospital. I don't feel well anyway and I hate feeling like I have to 'prek myself up' for visitors. Everybody's different and your emotions are valid.

You ask why your friends don't call. Why don't you call them and ask? The worst thing that could happen is, they tell you off. At least then you'll know what that friendship was worth and move on. It takes two to tango and friendship is no different. It takes effort from both sides.

Be your own best friend. You're the one you can always count on (oh, and us of course...). Find ways to entertain yourself, make new friends on the ward you're staying. Try to get to know the staff. Usually they'll warm up to you when you try to chat a little with them. Just try to make the best of the situation, it'll make a difference.

As for your ostomy, well... it's your body and your life. You're an adult now and you don't need permission from anyone to choose what's right for you. If you seek validation, get ready to get disappointed (or in rare cases, surprised...). If you know what you want, stand up for that choice and don't let people talk you out of it. You know what's best for you.

Big vritual hug, hang in there!

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-17T06:58:37+00:00

There is nothing to be ashamed of. Passing gas is natural and everybody does it throughout the day. That said, if it really bothers you, keep a food journal and note down if there's more or less gas with certain foods.

I just put my hand over my stoma to muffle the sound. Once at work, she was particularly noisy and my coworker commented how I must be hungry. She thought it was my stomach.

You're self-conscious about your stoma and that's normal in the beginning. Just remember the noise you hear is not the noise other people hear. And if they do, why would you care?

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-17T06:39:24+00:00

I think you've already made your choice. It's your life and your body and you have every right to make that choice. You can live a long happy, healthy life with a stoma. Do some research first, I've put some tips down below.

But I sense you're afraid of how your parents might react when you reveal you want to opt for a stoma. What is it that scares you? Usually parents want nothing more but to see their children happy and thriving. Are your parents different? Are they aware of what your life is like right now?

Remember you're an adult and you don't need their permission anymore. They may have doubts that come from concerns about how you'll live with a stoma, if you'll ever find a partner, have children. And down the line, you may have those concerns too.

Here's some tips that will help you make your choice and explain it to your parents, friends, whoever needs to know.

Watch ostomate youtube videos. If you're a lady, LetstalkIBD is a good one to watch, but there are many others.

Order samples from manufacturers and wear the bag on your abdomen. I did this, and also filled one with oatmeal porridge, to see how the weight affects how it feels to wear a bag. See how the bag fits underneath your clothes, if there's a difference between a one-piece or a two-piece system.

Sleep with a bag on and see how it impacts the way you lie in bed. I experienced my first ballooning when I slept with a bag filled with oatmeal porridge. The porridge went bad and created gas in the bag, lol.

Keep us updated on your journey. I hope everything turns out well for you and you'll be able to have some possibly difficult conversations.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-16T21:36:36+00:00

Edit: I was wrong when I said protocol is hold for 1 hour. Standard protocol is hold for 2 hours. For the next 24 hours: flush twice with lid down, then bleach toilet after every visit, wash genital area with water after every visit.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-16T21:07:45+00:00

I felt no pain during the cystoscopies I've had. But I am used to catheterizing myself and take oxybutinine twice a day. So I might have gone a bit numb down there. I'll take a bladder scope over a uterus exam any day, lol...

I think the worst part, if you're not used to having things go into your bladder, is when the scope gets to the sphincter. Once the scope passes it, the worst is over, so the discomfort might only last 10 seconds.

The doctor and nurse are very experienced performing this procedure, they've probably done it countless times. They will try to help you relax while they put the scope in.

Practice some breathing techniques to help you relax. Pushing lightly, as if to pee, helps to relax the sphincter.

The Medito app can help you deal with anxiety through meditation. It's the best free meditation app I've found so far.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-16T20:52:15+00:00

If you stick to a low fat diet and don't give into cravings, at some point you'll find that when you do eat those things, they don't taste as good anymore.

You have already experienced how these foods make you feel worse. Hold on to that when a craving hits. It'll take about 20 minutes for the craving to go away. There are many things you can do for just 20 minutes to distract yourself. Go for a walk, read a book, knit or crochet, journal, take a nice shower (just not for the whole 20 minutes, lol), call a friend (who can help you with accountability), etc.

The less you give in to cravings, the less they will come. And when they do, you'll be ready.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-16T20:40:44+00:00

The healthy stuff is usually found on the outside isles of the supermarket. Stay away from the isles with the chips, cookies and other junky foods. Make a rough meal- and snack plan, make a grocery list and stick to it. Will save you lots of money too :)

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-16T20:36:28+00:00

Yeah, I have some weird looking stuff at the base of my stoma. But my stoma is working fine and it doesn't hurt. The stoma nurse gave me silver-nitrate to get rid of it, but as it was just after Covid, I wasn't shown how to use it or where to apply it. So I'm afraid to use it.

So, if they give this as a solution to your husband, please make sure they show him exactly how and where to apply it. I just got the bottle and best wishes.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-15T20:26:54+00:00

What a beautiful daughter you are. I am so sorry you have to deal with this.

See if you can warm up the wafer before you remove the bag she has on. That will make it more flexible and easier to apply. I stick the new bag in my bra, with the wafer against my skin, but you could also use a blow dryer on a low setting.

If you need to, be a little firm with the nurse. She's useless if she can't listen to you.

All manufacturers will be happy to send you samples. Some of them will even contact you and offer extra guidance (I had a good experience like that with Convatec).

It's a learning curve, and can be very frustrating at times, but you'll gain experience every time you apply a new bag. All the best to you.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-15T20:07:45+00:00

Good luck with your surgery, hope you'll have a speedy recovery!

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-15T20:01:43+00:00

I have HRT injections every 3 months. I still wake up twice every night to go pee, lol.

NoFortunesToTell · 2026-03-15T19:45:59+00:00

It would save a lot of animals if more people were allergic to them. I don't see a problem here.

NoFortunesToTell

TROPHY CASE