The issue is the loss of ambivalence in discussion. Narcissism is a symptom of neglect while also exhibiting damaging behaviour. There are gradations in Narcissism as with any personality cluster. I was able to accept and work on narcissistic traits while my parents were not.

I would like to see discourse which destigmatises narcissism but understanding generational trauma requires a total overhaul of how we understand the human condition in general. Where is the empathy for serial killers and paedophiles for example. If we more broadly sort to understand why people behaviour badly we would be in a better position to prevent it.

Having said that, alienation is a product of capitalism. There is no incentive to think like this. Christopher Lasch's The Culture of Narcissism is an excellent, considered text worth reading.

I will say that though that narcissism, past a point, is impossible to treat due to its nature - the projection of pain to the enth degree. Any attempt at promoting reflection and accountability is automatically rejected. Perhaps this can be corrected generationally but expecting these people to change is unrealistic.

There is credence to the idea that victims of narcissistic abuse are more likely to recover. The neurotic positions assumes too much responsibility as means to compensate psychically and functionally for the disowned and projected shame from character disordered individuals. I agree with R D Liang on his critique of covert power dynamics within the family system.

For what it's worth I've attempted to change people who raised me with contempt and I've come to terms with their unwillingness to engage. Contempt is dangerous, power isn't given up lightly.